Welcome to The Carnival! {CoC #001} | 1359 words
Mar 20, 2021 7:29:30 GMT -5
Trey Bouchet and Johnny Bacchus like this
Post by Twiztid Insane on Mar 20, 2021 7:29:30 GMT -5
Kill Ya Homie: GUESS WHAT MUTHAFUCKO!
The scene kicks in with Kill Ya Homie bursting through the doors of an apartment, we can see to the left that Rist Kutta has just dropped a bottle of Faygo he just pulled out of the fridge.
Rist Kutta: Jesus Christ, Jay. You really gotta scare a homie like that?
The scene kicks in with Kill Ya Homie bursting through the doors of an apartment, we can see to the left that Rist Kutta has just dropped a bottle of Faygo he just pulled out of the fridge.
Rist Kutta: Jesus Christ, Jay. You really gotta scare a homie like that?
Kill Ya Homie: YOU WONT BE MAD AT ME IN A MINUTE YO! WE GOT BOOKED!
Rist Kutta instantly drops the demeanor and just starts laughing
Rist Kutta: Did we actually? Fuckin' aye! Look at us two, just a couple of homies finally getting their fuckin' shot in the big leagues. No more wrestlin' for a hotdog and a handshake. We in the big leagues now! They tell us who we where facing?
Rist Kutta instantly drops the demeanor and just starts laughing
Rist Kutta: Did we actually? Fuckin' aye! Look at us two, just a couple of homies finally getting their fuckin' shot in the big leagues. No more wrestlin' for a hotdog and a handshake. We in the big leagues now! They tell us who we where facing?
Kill Ya Homie:: Yeah it was... uhh...
An almost comical thought bubble pops up on screen as Kill Ya Homie thinks
Rist Kutta: Well? Who do we got?
An almost comical thought bubble pops up on screen as Kill Ya Homie thinks
Rist Kutta: Well? Who do we got?
Kill Ya Homie: I'm tryna think, man. Gimme a sec. Pineapple Pro... Prom...
Rist Kutta: Pineapple Prom?
Rist Kutta: Pineapple Prom?
Kill Ya Homie: Don't interrupt me man, you know words ain't my strong suit. What the fuck is that second word! FUCK!
Rist Kutta: Chill out homie, it ain't that deep. All that matters is that we booked! We got us a shot in the big leagues, AW ain't prepared to have a bunch of juggalos across two of their divisions. Next we gotta get us a fiiiiine juggalette to come with us to ringside.
Rist Kutta: Chill out homie, it ain't that deep. All that matters is that we booked! We got us a shot in the big leagues, AW ain't prepared to have a bunch of juggalos across two of their divisions. Next we gotta get us a fiiiiine juggalette to come with us to ringside.
Kill Ya Homie: Dude, it's twenty twenty-one. There ain't no juggalettes that'll be willin' to out themselves on national TV anymore. That's some wishful thinkin' right there.
Rist Kutta: Yee of lil faith. Imma make some calls. We gotta get our message out there and that, that's what the dudes in AW do, right?
Rist Kutta: Yee of lil faith. Imma make some calls. We gotta get our message out there and that, that's what the dudes in AW do, right?
Kill Ya Homie: You fuckin mark, of course they do. They cut these serious ass promos on eachother. Except for Twiz, man runs a news show, it's good shit. I reckon we'd be better off doin a serious one for a couple goes then goin and branchin' out with it. We gotta show peeps out there that... what the fuck 're we callin' our group again?
Rist Kutta: The Carnival of Carnage. I dunno man I panicked and didn't know what to call us. I think it works though, don't ya think?
Rist Kutta: The Carnival of Carnage. I dunno man I panicked and didn't know what to call us. I think it works though, don't ya think?
Kill Ya Homie: Ya know what? Yeah that ain't bad. Look, make your calls, we gotta get this promo shit sorted out, yo.
Kutta nods and walks out of frame, faintly in the background we can hear him talking to someone on the phone, in the foreground though we can see Kill Ya Homie still trying to remember the second word in Nidrah and Azurine Vebbins team name.
Rist Kutta: We're on! We gotta get there in halfa, you able to drive us there?
Kutta nods and walks out of frame, faintly in the background we can hear him talking to someone on the phone, in the foreground though we can see Kill Ya Homie still trying to remember the second word in Nidrah and Azurine Vebbins team name.
Rist Kutta: We're on! We gotta get there in halfa, you able to drive us there?
Kill Ya Homie: Of course I can. Lets fuckin get it.
(continuation from 'Juggalo TV: Championship Edition', go read that first.)
As the scene fades we can hear the same voice that NORMALLY opens up Juggalo TV.
"NOW PLEASE ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE TO YOU THE NEWEST MEMBERS OF THE JTV FAMILY. RIST KUTTA... KILL YA HOMIE... THE CARNIVAL OF CARNAGE!"
Now the scene has fully faded into a different studio, with the Hatchet Action News logo behind a bench where we can see The Carnival of Carnage sat wearing ridiculous suits and some not so subtle toupees.
Rist Kutta: Whoop Whoop Juggalos and Juggalettes, now I just wanna start off this program by thanking the reigning AW TV Champ, Twiztid Insane for allowing us to continue this program over in my studio... apartment here today.
(continuation from 'Juggalo TV: Championship Edition', go read that first.)
As the scene fades we can hear the same voice that NORMALLY opens up Juggalo TV.
"NOW PLEASE ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE TO YOU THE NEWEST MEMBERS OF THE JTV FAMILY. RIST KUTTA... KILL YA HOMIE... THE CARNIVAL OF CARNAGE!"
Now the scene has fully faded into a different studio, with the Hatchet Action News logo behind a bench where we can see The Carnival of Carnage sat wearing ridiculous suits and some not so subtle toupees.
Rist Kutta: Whoop Whoop Juggalos and Juggalettes, now I just wanna start off this program by thanking the reigning AW TV Champ, Twiztid Insane for allowing us to continue this program over in my studio... apartment here today.
Kill Ya Homie: We appreciate this chance to get our names out there, and who knows. If this goes well I reckon we'll be in his good books, this might become a permanent thing!
Rist Kutta: Now, onto the news!
The Hatchet Action News logo goes across the screen as it shows highlights from the most recent episode of CruiserClash.
Rist Kutta: In the opening contest we saw Flop pick up a decisive victory over the yogi, Shane Watson.
Rist Kutta: Now, onto the news!
The Hatchet Action News logo goes across the screen as it shows highlights from the most recent episode of CruiserClash.
Rist Kutta: In the opening contest we saw Flop pick up a decisive victory over the yogi, Shane Watson.
Kill Ya Homie: Next up we saw the returning Masuda Teijin pick up a W over Alex Scott, who knows where he's gonna go next!
Rist Kutta: Honestly, as long as it's away from us, I reckon we'll be right.
Rist Kutta: Honestly, as long as it's away from us, I reckon we'll be right.
Kill Ya Homie: Following that match we saw AW Hall of Famer Katta Pult take on... herself?
Rist Kutta: That's right, homie! In a great back and forth contest we saw- who the fuck am I kidding, this segment blew more than a two dollar hooker after the stimmies came in.
Kill Ya Homie starts laughing uncontrollably at that comment, trying his best not to crack himself up, Rist Kutta continues.
Rist Kutta: After that shit show we saw Minka Starr take on Tsukiko in what was ACTUALLY a back and forth contest, with Tsukiko picking up the win.
Rist Kutta: That's right, homie! In a great back and forth contest we saw- who the fuck am I kidding, this segment blew more than a two dollar hooker after the stimmies came in.
Kill Ya Homie starts laughing uncontrollably at that comment, trying his best not to crack himself up, Rist Kutta continues.
Rist Kutta: After that shit show we saw Minka Starr take on Tsukiko in what was ACTUALLY a back and forth contest, with Tsukiko picking up the win.
Kill Ya Homie: Afterwards we saw a St. Patricks Day Backstage Brawl! With Soldado Fortuna and CJ Phoenix duke it out like some real blokes would, which saw Soldado pick up the win.
Rist Kutta: Then in the main event we saw the Cruiserweight tag Titles on the line as the Two Gents took on the champs Pineapple Promenade.
Rist Kutta: Then in the main event we saw the Cruiserweight tag Titles on the line as the Two Gents took on the champs Pineapple Promenade.
Kill Ya Homie: PROMENADE! THAT WAS THE FUCKIN NAME!
Now Rist Kutta is the one cracking up in the news chair, forcing Kill Ya Homie to continue the story.
Now Rist Kutta is the one cracking up in the news chair, forcing Kill Ya Homie to continue the story.
Kill Ya Homie: So, to start the match off, yeah, both teams got smacked in the head with chairs! Fuckin' hell. Thats brutal. Anyways, the Two Gents won the belts back.
The camera cuts back to Rist Kutta, who's still cackling, Kill Ya Homie sighs and slaps him.
The camera cuts back to Rist Kutta, who's still cackling, Kill Ya Homie sighs and slaps him.
Kill Ya Homie: GET YA SHIT SORTED! We gotta cut a promo on Pineapple Lemonade now.
Rist Kutta: It's Promenade you fuckin' goof.
Rist Kutta: It's Promenade you fuckin' goof.
Kill Ya Homie: Ahh what the fuck ever. Lemme just talk to 'em for a minute here. Azurine Vebbins, Nidrah, I know the two of yous are still feeling the effects of getting smacked upside the dome with a couple of steel chairs, plus the beating the pair of yous took in your losin' effort to... am I readin' this right?
Rist Kutta: Yeah man, they only just won those fuckers, lost 'em in their first defence. So did the champs before them, it's just been short reign after short reign with those belts.
Rist Kutta: Yeah man, they only just won those fuckers, lost 'em in their first defence. So did the champs before them, it's just been short reign after short reign with those belts.
Kill Ya Homie: Damn, yo. That shits sad. But now we're here! The Carnival of Carnage is lookin' to take this bitch the fuck over! Our mission starts with you two. We get this win over yous and we look forward to the future, look to get ourselves a shot at the Cruiser Tag Titles. We ain't lookin just to take part in this division... nah fuck all of that.
Rist Kutta: We're lookin' to take over... and in our debut we're gonna come in, give one hundred and ten percent, walk out with the W... and make sure that this gig we got here in AW and on JTV is a permanent thing. Cause we don't wanna just be a couple of one hit wonders here. Fuck we sure as hell don't wanna be the guys that lost to the probably still concussed former champs. That might just put an asterisk next to our credibility as contenders to the tag belts... which is somethin' we don't want.
Rist Kutta: We're lookin' to take over... and in our debut we're gonna come in, give one hundred and ten percent, walk out with the W... and make sure that this gig we got here in AW and on JTV is a permanent thing. Cause we don't wanna just be a couple of one hit wonders here. Fuck we sure as hell don't wanna be the guys that lost to the probably still concussed former champs. That might just put an asterisk next to our credibility as contenders to the tag belts... which is somethin' we don't want.
Kill Ya Homie: So Pineapple Lemonade...
Rist Kutta: promenade...
Rist Kutta: promenade...
Kill Ya Homie: I hope y'all two muthafuckettes are ready for this match. Cause we're comin' into this match on the twenty-second with our sights set on showin' what we can do. What we're made of. That we still got what it takes to hang in the big leagues. That we still got the same hunger to thrive...
Rist Kutta: You better come into this match with the same intensity we're gonna.
Rist Kutta: You better come into this match with the same intensity we're gonna.
Kill Ya Homie: WHOOP WHOOP!
With those words, the scene fades to black. With the JTV logo being the last thing you see.
With those words, the scene fades to black. With the JTV logo being the last thing you see.