Which Seat Will She Take?
Apr 2, 2021 19:53:46 GMT -5
Johnny Bacchus, Katta Pult, and 1 more like this
Post by Minka Starr on Apr 2, 2021 19:53:46 GMT -5
Which Seat Will She Take?
Minka Svaatrinck, 14; limbs flailing as she shimmies to an overdubbed pop-synth beat in her bedroom. Her singing is alto-tuned:
“I May Be Home”
“But I’m Never Alone”
“Not when my Wi-Fi’s worrrrrrkkkkiiiiiiinnnnngggg-
She floomphs into a desk chair, primps, and powers up her iMac.
“Because I’ll Send a Signal”
“That lets me Mingle”
“My Circle of Friends is exxxxxxpppppaaannnnnndddddddiiiinnnnggggg!”
Minka pecks at her keyboard. The screen shows different teenagers vibing to the music:
“Chatrou-lette! Chatrou-lette!”
“The Wheel is Virtual”
“It’s Use is Invaluable”
“Chatrou-lette! Chatrou-lette!”
“Give it a Spin”
“Odds are you’ll Win”
“a Chance to meet your EVVVVERRRYYYYTTTHHHHIIINNNNGGGGG!!!”
Cut to a handsome lad grinning at Minka. She fans herself while simultaneously covering her webcam. Once regaining her composure, she unblocks the lens and coyly waves.
PAUSE.
The shot dollies back to show Minka Starr watching her past self on a monitor. She side-eyes the audience .
“I’ll spare you the rap interlude.”
Self-conscious smile. Hapless shrug.
“Oof. This was the result of seeing Rebecca Black’s ‘Friday’ and completely missing the point. I was a couple years removed from my first taste of fame; the wellspring dried up; leaving me thirsty. Not the blackest mark on my IMDB, but still humbling. I’m sharing this because people bring up my fame-seeking past.”
“Why?”
“I’ve embraced this cringey need to succeed knowing it’s what got me to this point.”
“It took more, ‘natch. I learned from mistakes like this video. There’s no shortcuts. I had to be willing to work.”
“That’s what I’ve done the last four years. Now, what I’ve been striving for is in reach.”
“Not notoriety.”
“Not just recognition.”
“Accomplishment.”
“Look at what I’ve managed in Action Wrestling with only a handful of matches.”
“Dissecting Flop physically and psychically.”
“Reminding Clash’s Trey Bouchet how right he was about CruiserClash being the A Show.”
“Giving CJ Phoenix a lesson in despair.”
“Outfoxing Tsukiko.”
“Becoming Number One Contender for the Cruiserweight Championship.”
“Quite the sizzle reel for the Greenhorn from Greenpoint.”
“‘Course, others can claim a similar pedigree; including the woman currently holding the strap.”
“Hiya, Regan.”
“We don’t have much in common besides our newbie ”It Girl” status. You’re the Rule 63 Hannibal Lecter with less misanthropic dietary habits; I’m the Manic Pixie Nightmare Girl to those who need putting in their place.”
“Does that include you?”
“Kinda sorta. Your place is behind me. I’ll prove that soon.”
“But should you be lumped in with chuds like Flop, Phoenix, and Jim Mud?”
“Imma reserve judgement for now. There’s business before our dance.”
“We got Spayde Martinez and Karlie Nash. The CC Main Event’s booked to ask ‘Can Champ and Challenger get along?’.”
“ I can only answer for myself. You’ll have to decide what kind of champion you are.:”
“One who’s defined by Philidor Holdings; receiving chairshots one week and tainted title wins the next?”
“Or one who works with her rival to murk two salty dogs dying to prove they don’t belong in their yard?”
“Those’re the stakes, Rea.”
“Together, we can beat those goons. Karlie’s not on our level. If Action thinks she deserves a spot on their Mount Rushmore that monument’s more problematic than Nathan Bedford Forrest on Horseback. How many times has she spit the bit when going for the top spot? Answer: Too many. Time to make Nash Brazzers Exclusive, and I say that as one who finds no shame in sex work.”
“And Spayde’s got no spine. She came in strong; claiming her Women’s Title was worth something. And for her it was when she could defend it against Karlie or Azurine Vebbins who’s too classy to stoop to her level.”
“But what happened when Martinez faced someone with skill and will?”
“The Ace of Spaydes said ‘Deuces, Bitch’.”
“Lissie Hope took her belt and Spayde did nothing about it. It wasn’t Katta Pult that made the Women’s Title a joke; Martinez did by being too chickenshit to force Lissie to defend it.”
“And you beat Lissie, Rea.”
“Karlie and Spayde have only one shot to win Monday: if we let the Cruiserweight Title get between us.”
“Prove you belong on the throne, and don’t.”