Choose Your Afterlife
Mar 14, 2021 22:57:57 GMT -5
Claire Hawkins, Orret the Match Writer, and 3 more like this
Post by Dionysus on Mar 14, 2021 22:57:57 GMT -5
"Come, weary traveler. Sit a spell by my fire and tell me of your journey.
Where are you?
Why, you sit alongside me in Purgatory, the realm in-between. Not quite alive, not quite dead. Think of it as a place you enter when you are on a high; a place your conscious can spread like water across a linoleum floor. Usually this ends up being a landing platform to your choice of afterlife: Heaven or Hell, if you'd believe the christians. Fairly simple to understand, though; should your life be full of righteous indignity, you're carted to paradise. Should it be filled with debauchery and sin, the flames guide your soul to the pit. Never did understand that strange dynamic; both sound awful, when you really think about it.
You're probably thinking, "Dionysus, paradise (or heaven, whichever sounds better for you) sounds pretty damn rad!" See, that's the problem with heaven; its filled with empty promise. Eternal paradise? A chorus of angels? Have you seen what angels look like?
Oh yeah, that's what I want to wake up to every morning; a flock of flying hemorrhoid doughnuts screeching eldritch nonsense until I end up wanting to rip my ears out, but realizing I can't because I'm in fucking paradise, apparently. See what I mean? Its absurd to expect anything from "paradise" when there's the potential of garbage like that. Its why I don't really bother buying what Mr. Abraham is selling when it comes to his brand of righteous indignation. At the end of the day, its the same parlor room talk of how its "oh, I'll bring the hand of God down upon him," all the while thinking about when he's next expecting to push his snake oil preaching style. Make no mistake; the preacher is a snake and it won't take long for that slimy exterior to shed, revealing the truly revolting essence of the man underneath.
...And you thought my analogy on realistic angels was leading to nowhere, didn't you?
Not to fear, I find Hell to be equally ridiculous. How so? In most cases, it is a realm of fire and brimstone, except for when a river runs through it filled with the souls of the damned, and you are able to cross but "for the love of god don't pay the ferryman" or something. I mean really, which is it? Fire or water? Powerful Satan, or "Power-bottom-to-a-cardboard-cutout-of-saddam-hussein" Satan? There's a reason I'm not given to temptation like Jayson Price is, and that's because the end result is just plain boring. Like milk, Price's time in Action Wrestling could be considered souring, past its prime, and has the uncanny smell of a rat dying inside an old jockstrap. And if we're being honest, even Hell wouldn't be free of that stench of mediocrity.
Its why I belong here, in Purgatory. Neither good nor evil, neither of law or of chaos; I simply exist. I am simply a presence, an enigma, a force that either stands as a bulwark or as the doorman to the next step. The expectation of being placed among the worthy of paradise or condemnation to the depths is something that is really beyond me. I exist in the now, standing between two gates and two gatekeepers. Among the pearls stands Mr. Abraham, fully intending to guide me down "his" path, not necessarily "the" path to paradise. Among the brimstone stands Jayson Price, having just clamored out from the depths only to be kicked down once more.
Why not make it easier for all involved? Go back beyond your gates, slam them closed, bar them from your end, and leave me on my merry way. I exist here, in Purgatory. This is my realm. If you think you belong here, you go through me first.
...What's that? You're wondering why you're here? Without me having to prove your worth first?
Why, dear listener, I always wanted you here. Who else would listen to my weird tale? Now you better enjoy that fire I made for you; I had to steal it from elsewhere, and I believe the powers that be do not like that.
Perhaps they won't notice...like they always have.
From the Desk of Dr. Jonas Elbrook Persons of Interest: Sophia Denise Necurat - 57, Mother of Dionysus. Former school teacher, retired after diagnosis of alzheimer's. Benjamin Jones - 62, Chairman of The Necurat Foundation, performer at The Dakota Jazz Club with "The Nice Guys Trio." William E. Ross - 24, personal assistant/bodyguard for Dionysus. Convincing body double, recent hire. Anton Heedon - 61, Uncle of Dionysus, brother-in-law of Sophia. Known criminal; current whereabouts unknown. Amy Esteed - 27, rehabilitation specialist. Former lover of Dionysus; no longer living in the area. Nakahara Junzo - 36, Business partner in Japan. Owner of the Temple of the Dragon Dojo. Limited contact. |