Juggalo TV Episode Four {#004} | 1000 words
Jan 9, 2021 1:22:14 GMT -5
Stuart Slane and Reo Raijin like this
Post by Twiztid Insane on Jan 9, 2021 1:22:14 GMT -5
"GATHER ROUND JUGGALOS AND JUGGALETTES FOR THE GREATEST SHOW IN TOWN! This right here is a special episode of Juggalo TV for all the homies out there... so prepare yourselves for one of, if not, the greatest internet talk shows that you will ever witness... and now... please allow me to introduce to you, your Ringmaster... TWIZTID... IN... SANEEEEEE!"
As the introduction finishes cameras fade in to a makeshift news room where we can see a man sat in an office chair, the man spins around to show us that it is indeed the Juggalo face painted, suit wearing, backyard legend himself, Twiztid Insane.
Twiztid Insane: Whoop Whoop Muthafuckos and Muthafuckettes, it's ya muthafuckin boy Twiztid Insane. Now today's show is something different, I put a tweet out a couple days ago askin' for some suggestions as to what you wanna see from me going into this episode, and with my next match in Action Wrestling being a massive shot for me and my homies, which I will get into later in the episode, I thought what better than debut a new segment on the show, called "Storytime with Charlie"! So now I'll send you over to the man behind this face paint, the man who made all of this possible... CHARLIE... EVANSSSS!
The scene faces to Charlie Evans, dressed in a fancy looking suit, sat in a fancy chair in front of an old TV playing a loop of a fireplace.
Charlie Evans: Oh, hi there Juggalos and Juggalettes, gather round! Imma tell y'all a story today, the story of how I got started with the Juggalo lifestyle... now buckle in, cause its quite the story...
Charlie reaches to the left of him, and picks up some reading glasses that don't actually have the glasses part of them in, and a book, which we can't see the title of, because it has "Story of Twiztid Insane" painted over it... and it's upside down.
Charlie Evans: 'Twas a typical thursday evening for young Charlie who was playing with his wrestling figures in 1997, when over his radio he heard "Halls of Illusions" by the Insane Clown Posse, which looking back on it, probably wasn't a good thing. As this was the version of the song that hadn't been censored yet, so it contained a lot of things that a 7 year old shouldn't have been listening to, but he became obsessed with ICP and the Juggalo life, buying all of their CDs, his room became covered in posters and paintings of ICP... from that point onwards, Young Charlie was engulfed in the Juggalo lifestyle, eventually meeting Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope and basing his entire wrestling career around his lifestyle choices. Sure, he may have gotten teased at school for doing so, but it didn't matter to him, to quote "Juggalo Homies' by Insane Clown Posse, "Well that's my home boys, excuse me, my family." They accepted him, while other may not.
Charlie then throws the book at the TV casually, turning to face the camera again.
Charlie Evans: Wow... how informative. So Young Charlie discovered the Juggalo life from a young age, and never looked back. Tune in next week for how Young Charlie got his start in backyard wrestling, now, back to you in the studio, Twiztid!
The camera cuts back to Twiztid who wipes a fake tear from his eye
Twiztid Insane: That was something else, homies... but anyways. Moving onto our next and final segment for tonight, a returning favourite... "Talk Shit, Get Hit"! Todays topic will be my opponent at the next Clash...
Twiztid clears his throat and the camera cuts, with Twiztid now wearing a bald cap, fake hair, baseball cap and big old dial up phone, and in his best manager who sounds like he would manage the next best thing voice, he says
Twiztid Insane: THE RRRREEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGNNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGG, DDDDDEEEEEFFFFFFFEEEEEENNNNNDDDDDIIIIINNNNNGGGGGG, ACTION WRESTLING TELEVISION CHAMPION..... DDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!
Twiztid clears his throat and shakes his head, going back to his regular self.
Twiztid Insane: Sorry bout that folks, not sure what came over me there. Anyways, yeah my next match is against the TV Champ Downfall in my first shot at a belt in Action Wrestling. Which is fucking awesome! I never thought in my short time here that I'd be deserving of a championship shot so quickly, so I'm grateful for this opportunity that I've been given here and against a guy like Downfall I know it'll be a tough fight. Tougher than I've had so far in my AW Career. Downfall has had a deathgrip on that TV title since the episode of Turmoil on the twenty-sixth of November, now while I can't claim to be as agile or as tough as I once was. But Downfall, homie. I've got just as much fight in me as I once did, and no matter how much you throw at me, I'll give it my all to throw it all back at you. I'm older than when I started in the backyards in the mid 2000's but I got a heart of gold and I'm not looking to choke on my first REAL shot here in Action Wrestling... and if you wanna bring all your boys to ringside cause you're scared that a thirty year old Juggalo has the chance to beat you and take your belt, then I guess that really shows your true colors, homie. So you can talk the shit you want, I'll be GLAD to knock you off your pedestal.
Twiztid then just gives a wicked smile to the camera, before going back to his normal self.
Twiztid Insane: So thanks for joining me on this episode of JTV, we've run out of time here homies! Make sure you watch Monday Night Clash to watch me smack the current TV champ about and hopefully winning me some gold! WHOOP WHOOP!
And with those words, the cameras in the studio fade to black, with the JTV logo being the last thing you see.
As the introduction finishes cameras fade in to a makeshift news room where we can see a man sat in an office chair, the man spins around to show us that it is indeed the Juggalo face painted, suit wearing, backyard legend himself, Twiztid Insane.
Twiztid Insane: Whoop Whoop Muthafuckos and Muthafuckettes, it's ya muthafuckin boy Twiztid Insane. Now today's show is something different, I put a tweet out a couple days ago askin' for some suggestions as to what you wanna see from me going into this episode, and with my next match in Action Wrestling being a massive shot for me and my homies, which I will get into later in the episode, I thought what better than debut a new segment on the show, called "Storytime with Charlie"! So now I'll send you over to the man behind this face paint, the man who made all of this possible... CHARLIE... EVANSSSS!
The scene faces to Charlie Evans, dressed in a fancy looking suit, sat in a fancy chair in front of an old TV playing a loop of a fireplace.
Charlie Evans: Oh, hi there Juggalos and Juggalettes, gather round! Imma tell y'all a story today, the story of how I got started with the Juggalo lifestyle... now buckle in, cause its quite the story...
Charlie reaches to the left of him, and picks up some reading glasses that don't actually have the glasses part of them in, and a book, which we can't see the title of, because it has "Story of Twiztid Insane" painted over it... and it's upside down.
Charlie Evans: 'Twas a typical thursday evening for young Charlie who was playing with his wrestling figures in 1997, when over his radio he heard "Halls of Illusions" by the Insane Clown Posse, which looking back on it, probably wasn't a good thing. As this was the version of the song that hadn't been censored yet, so it contained a lot of things that a 7 year old shouldn't have been listening to, but he became obsessed with ICP and the Juggalo life, buying all of their CDs, his room became covered in posters and paintings of ICP... from that point onwards, Young Charlie was engulfed in the Juggalo lifestyle, eventually meeting Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope and basing his entire wrestling career around his lifestyle choices. Sure, he may have gotten teased at school for doing so, but it didn't matter to him, to quote "Juggalo Homies' by Insane Clown Posse, "Well that's my home boys, excuse me, my family." They accepted him, while other may not.
Charlie then throws the book at the TV casually, turning to face the camera again.
Charlie Evans: Wow... how informative. So Young Charlie discovered the Juggalo life from a young age, and never looked back. Tune in next week for how Young Charlie got his start in backyard wrestling, now, back to you in the studio, Twiztid!
The camera cuts back to Twiztid who wipes a fake tear from his eye
Twiztid Insane: That was something else, homies... but anyways. Moving onto our next and final segment for tonight, a returning favourite... "Talk Shit, Get Hit"! Todays topic will be my opponent at the next Clash...
Twiztid clears his throat and the camera cuts, with Twiztid now wearing a bald cap, fake hair, baseball cap and big old dial up phone, and in his best manager who sounds like he would manage the next best thing voice, he says
Twiztid Insane: THE RRRREEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGNNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGG, DDDDDEEEEEFFFFFFFEEEEEENNNNNDDDDDIIIIINNNNNGGGGGG, ACTION WRESTLING TELEVISION CHAMPION..... DDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNFFFFFFFFFFAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!
Twiztid clears his throat and shakes his head, going back to his regular self.
Twiztid Insane: Sorry bout that folks, not sure what came over me there. Anyways, yeah my next match is against the TV Champ Downfall in my first shot at a belt in Action Wrestling. Which is fucking awesome! I never thought in my short time here that I'd be deserving of a championship shot so quickly, so I'm grateful for this opportunity that I've been given here and against a guy like Downfall I know it'll be a tough fight. Tougher than I've had so far in my AW Career. Downfall has had a deathgrip on that TV title since the episode of Turmoil on the twenty-sixth of November, now while I can't claim to be as agile or as tough as I once was. But Downfall, homie. I've got just as much fight in me as I once did, and no matter how much you throw at me, I'll give it my all to throw it all back at you. I'm older than when I started in the backyards in the mid 2000's but I got a heart of gold and I'm not looking to choke on my first REAL shot here in Action Wrestling... and if you wanna bring all your boys to ringside cause you're scared that a thirty year old Juggalo has the chance to beat you and take your belt, then I guess that really shows your true colors, homie. So you can talk the shit you want, I'll be GLAD to knock you off your pedestal.
Twiztid then just gives a wicked smile to the camera, before going back to his normal self.
Twiztid Insane: So thanks for joining me on this episode of JTV, we've run out of time here homies! Make sure you watch Monday Night Clash to watch me smack the current TV champ about and hopefully winning me some gold! WHOOP WHOOP!
And with those words, the cameras in the studio fade to black, with the JTV logo being the last thing you see.