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Post by "The Boy Named Sue" Sue Cooley on Aug 8, 2020 20:32:36 GMT -5
Somewhere just over the Kanasas state line your boi is hurled from the stopped 18 wheeler by a mad trucker who's had enough of the boy named Sue and his "trash juice" music. The fat ass trucker better be glad he's able to drive away before Sue can get up and collect himself after hitting dat pavement hard. The Boy Named Sue: Shoo, deese truckers be racist as fuck out hur. I can't wait to beat dat cape wearin' bitchboi on Clash so I can get dem green-backs and get my whip outta impound. He dusts himself off and starts walking down the small back-road shortcut the trucker was taking, with dat knee dipping thug swag in his walk. A few cars drive by and he throws out his thumb for a hitch-hike but they straight diss him by not picking up a thug. The Boy Named Sue: Aight den, I see how it be. He continues hitch-hiking with his thumb out and his other hand holding up his sagging thug pants. To be continued by anyone wanting to regret their decision of stopping for him. {Open thread cuz I'm bored}
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Post by Luke Force on Aug 8, 2020 23:05:03 GMT -5
Luke Force is driving his rental car on his way out of Wichita. He notices Sue Cooley walking on the side of the road. Luke remembers the blacked out tinted windows on the rental and rolls them up. Luke speeds up to swerve into the puddle on the side of the road. The muddy water soaks Sue Cooley and Luke drives off laughing.
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Post by "The Boy Named Sue" Sue Cooley on Aug 9, 2020 6:37:57 GMT -5
Sue fumbles around in his saggin pants for his gat and finally manages to whip it out but the half steppin' muthafucker who'd done the boy named Sue wrong is too far away so Sue starts poppin off rounds in the air.
The Boy named Sue: DATS RIGHT YOU DONT WANT DIS SMOKE! FLIP THAT BITCH! COME ON!
Now that his clothes are soaking wet his saggin' pants are harder to keep up but he does the best he can.
As if things couldn't get worse it start raining pretty bad.
The Boy Named Sue: Shoo, imma catch a cold out hur.
He puts his gat back in his pants.
TBC by anyone
(open thread)
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Post by Trey Bouchet on Aug 9, 2020 7:20:01 GMT -5
The Cajun Catapult is driving by when he sees Sue. He pulls over.
"Hey I recognize you! You're Sue Cooley! I saw you online tearing up that Taco Bell and I can relate. The way they gutted their menu is bogus! No Beefy Frito Burrito?! No Loaded Grillers!?! No Spicy Potato Soft Tacos?!?!? What were they thinking?! Hey you need a belt? I can loan you one of mine! You can return it after the show, uh, if you get there in time. I'd give you a ride, but um, you're really wet and the car's a rental y'know. Also I saw you shooting off that gun like you're Yosemite Sam and that makes me wonder about your rage issues. Even I can't suplex a bullet! Speaking of which, how come there's no suplexes listed on your Action Wrestling Profile Page? Don't you 'resplect the 'plex'? You should! Best move in wrestling! You should think about adding one to your moveset! Call it the Sue-plex, that's S-U-E-plex, on account of your name! Anyway, I'm running late but that offer for a belt still stands.
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Post by "The Boy Named Sue" Sue Cooley on Aug 9, 2020 23:06:16 GMT -5
The boy named Sue keeps getting more red faced as the man keeps doggin' him out with his side ways talk. When Trey mentions the suplex stuff Sue twitches a lot. His mind races back to the big bully Eddie Brown in 3rd grade who suplexed your boi Sue off the top of the monkey bars. it broke a few of his bones. Er' since then Sue been anti plex. It triggers a thug like him.
Sue starts banging angrily on the roof of Trey's car.
The Boy Named Sue: FUCK YO SUPLEX! FUCK YO SUPLEX MOFUCKA! I AIN'T LITTLE NO MO EDDIE!! I AIN'T GOTS NO ANGER ISSUE, I GOTS A ZERO TOLERANCE FOR BOOSHIT ISSUES!
Sue notices Trey was right about da belt tho. He sees a belt laying on some gear in the passenger seat so he grabs it and closes the ends together and starts whippin' Trey on the arm wid it.
The Boy Named Sue: YOU GONNA GIMME A RIDE MOFUCKA! GIMME DAT RIDE! IMMA CATCH A COLD OUT HUR!
Sue would just use his gat but he emptied the clip out in his anger a moment ago. He tries to open the passenger door but its locked so he begins the process of trying to climb into the car via the rolled down passenger window.
TBC by anyone
(open thread)
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Post by Trey Bouchet on Aug 9, 2020 23:35:35 GMT -5
Trey Bouchet in the face of this plextreme belligerance decides to retreat. He pushes Sue back out the window and burns rubber out of there. He does leave his belt behind though.
"Let someone else deal with that psycho," he mutters while rubbing the feeling back into his suplexing arm.
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Post by Carnivore on Aug 9, 2020 23:48:39 GMT -5
'Carnivore' Daniel Dream is seated in the back seat of a black car, his most loyal cultist is driving with a car full of cultists following close behind. Daniel stares out the car's window when he sees a drenched Sue, Daniel turns to his driver.
"Woah stop the car."
The driver looks out the window then turns to Carnivore.
"He can get in but you are paying for the seat."
Carnivore looks out the window, then back at the seat, then back at the drenched wannabe wrestler catching a cold about to die on the side of the street. A fate that the Cult Leader knows all too well. Daniel unrolls the window.
"Sue! Uh I mean Mr. Cooley! Get in!"
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