Post by Alice on Mar 31, 2020 17:07:15 GMT -5
Alice wanders the aisles at Walmart, she looks at her shopping list:
Tampons
Paracetamol
Vanilla Yogurt
Wesley, the man sized tampon of Action Wrestling. Why do I believe you resemble a feminine hygiene product? Well for starters you are great at absorbing menstrual flow like The Cool Kids! Your bitch Vayden was as much use as bloody discharge from a vagina, sitting on his arse unable to prevent Rion from being pinned, but ultimately it was you who made him weak. You soaked them in by proclaiming you were their Daddy, offering hope for their weak minds, hooking them into your mirage whilst you absorbed their potential, leaching off their success circa Estrella’s TV title reign. And now that you’ve absorbed all their potential and become US Champion, you have discarded them like you did Ariel Shadows. But I see past the act Daddy, you can’t absorb The Hard as Fuck Girl, my flow is too heavy for you, you need an ultra but yet your only a regular. Move out of the way and crawl back up that vagina you recently were pulled out of, or better yet flush yourself down the toilet and join your fellow IlluminGnarly family, discarded and all washed up.
Some feel paracetamol can help ease a hangover, not in this situation, as we continue to endure the hangover of ZMac’s former glory years from WCF and everywhere else. ZMac was once a fearsome warrior, but now he is much of an afterthought, similar to that of memories of a drunken night fading away through the suffering of a hangover. His regeneration skills though keep bringing him back, meaning we have to endure his fucked up riddles time and time again. It’s so draining that it makes you want to just take a handful of paracetamol just to avoid having to suffer watching or listening to any of his crap any further. But on second thought, I could just shove the paracetamol down your throat instead, though his stubborn ass would probably spit them out. The Hard as Fuck Girl will have to break your jaw so you don’t spit them out, you stupid dick, just die already.
And then there is Teo Blaze, the vanilla yogurt of Action Wrestling. For someone with such a colourful history, so many changes in “flavour”, you have still ended up as boring vanilla, practically flavourless, adding little to the Action Wrestling fan’s palette. You're versatile like yogurt, you accompany many others well, like my partner Corey Bull, you make the perfect whipping boy for him. But much like yogurt Teo, you have a short expiration date, and yours went off long ago, simply donning and removing your mask on and off won’t fix the problem sweetie, your fucked, your rancid and smell bad and need to be discarded as your not any use to anyone now. Good job The Hard as Fuck Girl is ready with my foot on the pedal of the bin ready to discard you.