Back from the Dead : Part 2
Feb 20, 2020 23:39:16 GMT -5
“The RevolutiDaddy” Wesley, Lissie Hope, and 4 more like this
Post by Geri Vayden on Feb 20, 2020 23:39:16 GMT -5
The funeral continues as Geri Miller steps up to the podium. She was outside and literally ran full speed ahead. Slightly out of breath, she speaks.
”Arnold was a dick.”
The crowd gasps as Geri laughs.
”Nah, I didn’t know the guy. He looks like a good enough guy but I am here to speak on someone I do know. Daniel Dream.”
Derrick makes a slashing motion with his hand on his throat.
”Oh right. I am here to speak on second comings. You see, when we die, do we truly die? Well, yes we do. However, career deaths can be overcome and I am living proof.”
Geri clears her throat as she grabs a bottle of Holy Water from the podium. She drinks it down and lets out a refreshed “Ahh” sound as the crowd looks on mortified. She looks out at the crowd with a look of wonder.
”What, I smoked a blunt and had some cotton mouth. Anyway, Lissie Hope had taken a liking to Estrella Luiz and Kennedy Matthews was beyond jealous. A plan was in place to use me as a pawn in the formation of the Royal Family and I could leave wrestling, no questions asked. That is when Lissie suggested me as a fourth member. I was always that, or so it felt. A final piece of a puzzle to make them look better.”
Geri takes the microphone and begins pacing the crowd. She has a seat next to Vayden as she smiles at him.
”I joined the Cruiserweight Division where I met the love of my life. We went from fighting to fucking to loving. Estrella joined up with us and I truly experienced life after death with the Cool Kidz and Ignarly.”
Geri kisses Derrick softly and then continues speaking.
”That brings me back to the MadClan. There was once a plan for me to join the MadClan. Then, I found out that they were frauds. I found out their leader, MadWoman Szalinski was simply cashing in off her brother’s name. There is one thing I can’t stand and that is a liar. So I bailed. Before long, MadWoman left because she couldn’t hack it in the lime light. Still, Raging Dead and Carnivore carry on the stolen identity. Carnivore needs to be locked away and the key needs to be destroyed so he can never get out. The man seems to find solace in the fact that his parents were murdered right in front of him, much like dear old Arnold here.”
She points at the casket as a very concerned voice can be heard from the crowd.
”Arnold was murdered?!”
Geri shrugs her shoulders.
”Yes. I mean, no. I mean, I don’t know. It has already been established that Derrick and I do not know Arnold, nor do we know any of you. We simply are here to let the truth be known. Now, if you could kindly shut up and let me talk. Where was I? Oh yes, Carnivore. Carnivore. Now, Carnivore is trying to be a fraud in another way. He now greets his fans by calling them the Cult of Carnivore. The MadClan has gone from formidable tag team to podcast hosts who do nothing more than fart jokes for no reason. Newsflash, Estrella Luiz YouTube Videos will forever be greater than MadClan Amateur Radio hour. I listened to the replay of the podcast you all did last week and all I can say is you are right. You and Dead can’t make things happen because, quite honestly, you are boring as all fuck. Action Wrestling had to put you across from the Cool Kidz simply to get a MadClan segment to be rated highly. ”
She laughs as she just can’t contain herself.
These wonderful people thought they were here for the funeral of Arnold but ther are witnessing the verbal massacre of the MadClan. They are watching as Derrick and myself expose the phonies for who they truly are. They are nothings and nobodies and anyone who can sit back and call themselves fans of the MadClan are nothings and nobodies right along with them. Trash begets more trash. Look at how fucked up the world is today. We allow the MadClan to keep filling the heads of our youth then who knows if there will even be a future. I am only twenty two, almost twenty three. I need to live long enough to have fucked up kids of my own that I won’t be able to afford counseling for.”
Geri sits down on the stage and shakes her head.
It is an absolute travesty that Action Wrestling will give anyone with a slight pulse a live microphone. We need more people to say “Fuck you that is quite enough” but no. Action Wrestling relies on people like the Cool Kidz for ratings and people like MadClan for internet meme material. Action believes all publicity is good publicity. Will it be good publicity when someone crazy like Carnivore loads up a bunch of AR15s and starts unloading? I think not. Why should we let it get to that point? Don’t worry Torture, Camilla, Gravedigger. The Cool Kidz have your back and will make sure the MadClan learns the error of their ways. We will use love to show how they are making a mockery of our home.”
Geri stands up and looks out at the crowd. She turns to a random page in the bible at the podium.
”I do not know much about the bible but I will say this. Eph...Ephes… E 1:7 states, and I am paraphrasing, In them we have redemption. Basically believe in the Cool Kidz and you will be redeemed. Believe in the MadClan and you can all go to hell with them! ”
Geri paces the church again. Looking at people as she speaks.
”Do you trust people who surround themselves with murderers, thieves, and common street thugs? ”
The people shake their heads no.
”Do you trust people who surround themselves with harlots and whores? ”
The crowd, again, shakes their heads no.
”Do you know who does? Daniel Dream. He surrounds himself with people who just think they are honest. The MadClan took away the name of a man who could not fight to keep it. They took away the vision of a world champion. And for what? Name recognition? You see, The Cool Kidz and IGnarly, we make names for ourselves. We do not live on the lies and tragedies of others. We do not piggyback on those who cannot stop us. Just like Daniel Dream should be locked away for conspiracy to commit murder, so shall the MadClan be cast aside with the lepers and the heretics. Let he without coolness be shot straight to the depths of Hell. Let the sinners be cursed and that includes the MadClan.”
Geri stops for a moment as she looks around. The jaws of the congregation are dropped to the floor.
”Just as each of you look right now, so do I look when I see that the MadClan is somehow at number two in the tag team rankings. With Rush right around the corner it should be us. The Cool Kidz vs FemDom is a dream match and there are but two obstacles in the way from letting that happen. One is a legit speedbump and the other is a mirage of circumstance. You see, last week, we did exactly as we said we would against Red, White, and Bruised. So, shall we do this week against the MadClan.”
Geri drops the microphone as she and Derrick run out the door and jump in the car. Geri laughs as they speed off.
”What a fucking rush that was!”
Derrick laughs as he replies.
"We need to keep showing this tag division exactly why we are the ones everyone wants to be. We are the Cool Kidz. This week, Estrella wins back her title and we take another step forward in the tag team rankings."
Geri grabs Derrick’s hand as he drives.
”In a few week’s it will make one year since I entered wrestling. A year ago, I didn’t think I would be here. I thought I would be dead or hooked on drugs like my mother. Here I am, I have the best guy by my side and a best friend who won’t give up on me.”
She fakes a cry as she laughs instead.
”Didn’t think I would get that sappy on ya did ya? Fact of the matter is that we will handle the Carnivore and Company just like we did Karlie Nash and Company last week. When we leave this week, Action will have to consider us for the tag team title match at Rush.”
Derrick pulls over at a restaurant. He looks deep into Geri’s eyes.
"Since we are all dressed up how about a date?"
Geri smiles from ear to ear as she kisses Derrick.
”You know I can’t say no to you.”
Derrick laughs again.
"You did with Flop the Cat."
She kisses him again.
”Just shut up and keep looking cute.”
The couple hold hands as they walk into the restaurant and the scene fades to black.