Addy A
CW/TV Champion
Posts: 254
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Post by Addy A on Jan 19, 2020 20:54:01 GMT -5
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Jacqui M
Professional Wrestler
Posts: 40
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Post by Jacqui M on Jan 22, 2020 14:23:43 GMT -5
The one thing I will say is, while I love Addy, I was able to predict the angle you were going to come at me from, and basically 8-Mile you with my own promo. As somebody who ALSO is guilty of predictable promos (hello Miles!), I just thought I'd point that out.
Also, bonus points for using my intentionally terrible attempt at shoot from when I first joined. That made me laugh. Props.
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Addy A
CW/TV Champion
Posts: 254
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Post by Addy A on Jan 31, 2020 18:45:10 GMT -5
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Post by Joey Flash on Feb 2, 2020 22:35:55 GMT -5
I read this!
Read your dialogue aloud to yourself and ask yourself if you've ever heard a person speak like that in real life.
Have you heard a three dimensional fully formed fictional character speak like that?
Has a wrestling promo you've ever heard sounded like that?
My biggest efedding pet peeve is unrealistic female portrayals. Not indicting you, if you're a woman and this is you expressing your vitriol and repressed sexuality - I'm down, but try manage it more.
If you're a man, come on, you can do better.
Talent is there, engage the reader rather than making them feel...dirty.
#yungodin
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