Post by Bad Ass Bob on Jan 16, 2020 20:56:57 GMT -5
Bad Ass Bob walks out into the middle of the busiest street in Columbus. Horns honk as Bob flips everyone off before speaking.
Here's how this is going to go. Because I am Bad Ass enough to literally stop traffic, and none of you are nearly Bad Ass enough to run me over then you are going to sit here and pay attention until I decide I've said my piece! You know why I did this?
Someone yells you're an asshole. Bob ignores him
I'm sick of being ignored. Old Bob would have just let it slide. Bad Ass Bob... I don't fucking think so! Bad Ass Bob does what he wants. Last week Action saw fit to not air my segment. That guy isn't a wrestler.. we could sue us They said. What a bunch of pussies. Bad Ass Bob does what Bad Ass Bob wants. I'll make sure next time Action can't leave me off the show by beating up everyone on the cruiserweight roster.
What better place to start with then Magic.. one of the guys who stole my opportunity to compete in the Havoc Rumble.. then did absolutely nothing with it! Last week you took a spot on that show that should have been mine. You did absolutely nothing with that too! I saw you getting your ass kicked. You were so pathetic your partner decided to no show rather then be associated with you! Smart move!
The only reason you even got in the rumble was because you're a cheap copy of Magic Maddox. People actually like that guy. For some reason. Nobody likes you though.. because you're like Criss Angel only somehow even lamer. I'm gonna do the world a favor and show you some real magic. I'm gonna make you disappear.. forever!
Either that.. or saw you in half. Nah.. then there would be two pieces of useless crap instead of one! You haven't won a single damn match in Action but they let you into the rumble. That pisses me off! I'm fixing to show the world what a mistake they made by beating your ass all over the ring! Bob is not a joke. Not anymore! You take something from Bob I'm damn well going to make you regret it. Especially if you're a rip-off piece of human garbage like Magic. Why don't you show the world a magic trick this week. You could lock yourself in a straight jacket.. then plunge into a tank of water.
Bob snorts.
You would just drown wouldn't you? Because you're as pathetic a magician as you are a wrestler! You know why I know you're a phoney. Because a real magician would at least have some pride in themselves. But you haven't said a word since you lost at the Rumble. You've been sulking. That's not Bad Ass.. that's not even half ass. you know what I did when I decided I deserved some respect? I fucking took it! Two weeks of CruiserClash.. two weeks Bob has shown up and kicked ass! I'm two and oh in the year 2020. You haven't so much as won a single match in AW. I'd say I was going to remain undefeated this week but I don't want to waste all these people's time with obvious shit. You had every opportunity to succeed and you failed each and every time! For me to get my shot I literally had to force my way on tv and kick the ass of any men who got in my way.
Now I ain't bitter about that. It made me the bad ass I am. See.. I had a choice.. I could remain a doormat.. a laughingstock.. or I could choose to do something about it. Magic.. on the other hand.. got handed everything on a silver platter.. he didn't have to work for it.. and it shows. Do yourself a favor.. don't pull the rabbit of a hat.. pull that silver spoon out of your ass and actually come to fight for a change. I'm going to kick your ass either way but at least you'll be able to hold your head up at the end of it that way.