Post by Ned the Intern on Jan 16, 2020 18:14:18 GMT -5
Chris and Ricky, the Schorg Bros… Action Wrestling's hottest new cruiserweight tag team… is ready for their upcoming debut. Today, they are in a small promo studio back home in Ozone Park trying to get in the groove.
"Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the Cruiserweight Division…"
"What are you talking about, Chris?"
"I was referencing Jaws, and trying to do a cool intro for us coming to Action Wrestling, Ricky. Just go with it."
"A little heads up would've been nice. You're so impulsive. If we're going to make it as a team, we've got to be on the same page."
"Same page. Got it. Same chapter. Same book. Same library. I'm with you, brother brother."
"Good. We officially debut next Monday. There's still a lot of work to do."
"Can't it wait until, like, Monday?"
"Monday is CruiserClash."
"But… we're really good at this, bro. It's in our blood."
"I set up a time to do a promo on the show, too. It's either live or a pretape. Just make sure you pack your gear this time."
"Chicago was an accident… and I made the best of it."
"You wrestled in jean shorts."
"The show must go on. My favorite four words."
"That's five words."
"You sure? Huh. I guess you're right."
"Are you high right now?"
"Mmmmmaaaaaaayyyyyyybe."
"Ugh. Come on, man. You know that stuff is bad for you."
"Is it though? Snoop Dogg and Willie Nelson seem to be doing just fine. Also, it's legal… basically everywhere now."
"Incorrect. The laws are tricky in Ohio, where we're going Monday."
"Then we're back in LA the next day… so it'll all be juuuuuust fine, my brother."
"You've got to focus, Chris. If you want to be the best, you've got to be your best."
"Now you sound like dad."
"Dad was right most of the time. He said if we stick together, we will be unstoppable. That's why now is the perfect time to sign up with Action Wrestling. They are bringing in a Cruiserweight Tag Team Championship that basically have our name on it."
"How many other cruiser tags are there?"
"SVS and VHS… Magic and Raab… Hobo and Cereal Guy… Kabukii and Eleanora… BdA and Psychopimp… HaVeN. It's a pretty stacked roster so far.
"Some of those don't sound right… but I get it. Big roster. We're going to have to come out swinging. We gotta show them what's what and who's who."
"What does that even mean?"
"I don't even know, bro. Ya think we can use any of this to get some content out?"
"Probably not. You didn't look over any of the notes I asked you to study before filming."
"I'm a pro wrestler, mmaaaaaann. I don't need a stupid script. I'm a shooter, bro. Just give me some targets and I'll get a touchdown."
"See what I mean. You're already butchering metaphors… and we haven't even debuted yet."
"S'all good, man. Whoa. I totally get it now. Saul Goodman. Mizind blizown."
"You're really too much sometime. Okay, let's get a little bit of usable content… and I'll just edit it to make sense. Cool?"
"Cool. "
Ricky looks directly at the camera.
"Good evening, Action Wrestling. We are the Schorg Bros. Our brother in law is the crazed monster Raging Dead. He's the reason we found out about this place. We've gone to a few shows, had a sweet tryout match… and here we are. We kick off 2020 on Monday in Columbus for tag team action packed action against Phoenix and Pandora… better known as HaVeN. Phoenix comes right out thinking she knows who we are and what we're about. She's already pinned us as a cookie cutter tag team… which is absolutely true. We were born into the world of wrestling and raised to so one thing: wrestle. We are identical twins, so it would make sense to use a cookie cutter. My ego tends to get the better of me… but Chris mellows me out. She has already attacked me for taking advantage of the weight limit."
"And I'm Chris!"
Das ende?
"Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the Cruiserweight Division…"
"What are you talking about, Chris?"
"I was referencing Jaws, and trying to do a cool intro for us coming to Action Wrestling, Ricky. Just go with it."
"A little heads up would've been nice. You're so impulsive. If we're going to make it as a team, we've got to be on the same page."
"Same page. Got it. Same chapter. Same book. Same library. I'm with you, brother brother."
"Good. We officially debut next Monday. There's still a lot of work to do."
"Can't it wait until, like, Monday?"
"Monday is CruiserClash."
"But… we're really good at this, bro. It's in our blood."
"I set up a time to do a promo on the show, too. It's either live or a pretape. Just make sure you pack your gear this time."
"Chicago was an accident… and I made the best of it."
"You wrestled in jean shorts."
"The show must go on. My favorite four words."
"That's five words."
"You sure? Huh. I guess you're right."
"Are you high right now?"
"Mmmmmaaaaaaayyyyyyybe."
"Ugh. Come on, man. You know that stuff is bad for you."
"Is it though? Snoop Dogg and Willie Nelson seem to be doing just fine. Also, it's legal… basically everywhere now."
"Incorrect. The laws are tricky in Ohio, where we're going Monday."
"Then we're back in LA the next day… so it'll all be juuuuuust fine, my brother."
"You've got to focus, Chris. If you want to be the best, you've got to be your best."
"Now you sound like dad."
"Dad was right most of the time. He said if we stick together, we will be unstoppable. That's why now is the perfect time to sign up with Action Wrestling. They are bringing in a Cruiserweight Tag Team Championship that basically have our name on it."
"How many other cruiser tags are there?"
"SVS and VHS… Magic and Raab… Hobo and Cereal Guy… Kabukii and Eleanora… BdA and Psychopimp… HaVeN. It's a pretty stacked roster so far.
"Some of those don't sound right… but I get it. Big roster. We're going to have to come out swinging. We gotta show them what's what and who's who."
"What does that even mean?"
"I don't even know, bro. Ya think we can use any of this to get some content out?"
"Probably not. You didn't look over any of the notes I asked you to study before filming."
"I'm a pro wrestler, mmaaaaaann. I don't need a stupid script. I'm a shooter, bro. Just give me some targets and I'll get a touchdown."
"See what I mean. You're already butchering metaphors… and we haven't even debuted yet."
"S'all good, man. Whoa. I totally get it now. Saul Goodman. Mizind blizown."
"You're really too much sometime. Okay, let's get a little bit of usable content… and I'll just edit it to make sense. Cool?"
"Cool. "
Ricky looks directly at the camera.
"Good evening, Action Wrestling. We are the Schorg Bros. Our brother in law is the crazed monster Raging Dead. He's the reason we found out about this place. We've gone to a few shows, had a sweet tryout match… and here we are. We kick off 2020 on Monday in Columbus for tag team action packed action against Phoenix and Pandora… better known as HaVeN. Phoenix comes right out thinking she knows who we are and what we're about. She's already pinned us as a cookie cutter tag team… which is absolutely true. We were born into the world of wrestling and raised to so one thing: wrestle. We are identical twins, so it would make sense to use a cookie cutter. My ego tends to get the better of me… but Chris mellows me out. She has already attacked me for taking advantage of the weight limit."
"And I'm Chris!"
Das ende?