Post by Teddy Geisel on Oct 26, 2018 13:02:50 GMT -5
Teddy Geisel is in his Washington DC apartment. He is writing a children’s book called “Dogs Don’t Eat Homework.” He has taken a break from writing and stepped into his home studio to reflect on this week’s six man tag match.
I’m in a ring
With five other guys, what do they bring?
Lopez brings nothing let’s make that clear.
In fact I’m not even sure that he will be there.
We probably don’t need him inside that square;
with the ropes surrounding my skill is astounding,
my partner’s a heartthrob, that means he’s heart pounding.
Your defeat is imminent it will be resounding.
You’ll be done for good, there is no rebounding.
It’s like your chance to win’s a car that we are impounding.
We take it in the middle of the night,
It in a yard with a dog, we lock it up tight.
What do you think will happen this Monday night?
Do you think your team is ready for this type of fight?
I don’t, now shut up and listen to why I’m right.
Let’s start with Roderick Cage, he’s your weakest link,
success in Europe? Mexico? You know what I think?
He’s had success nowhere and he’s trying to hoodwink,
he’s a liar, a phony, like a bad lip sync.
This is his first stop and his career will be a blink.
You know, it’s over before it started,
and it reeks like someone farted,
your look , your gimmick, your life, all retarded,
you’re a community college my ass is Harvard,
I’m so right you could call me starboard,
you’re like Uber, I’m a flight that’s chartered,
beware, your teammate, you may get Pearl Harbored.
Koji Iwatani; ching ling ding ding ding dow.
That’s Jap speak for, I wish it were Monday, I’d beat your ass now.
Your team can’t win, you just don’t know how,
Please, enter my ring and offer that Japanese bow.
Then I’ll make your head ring when it hits the mat, pow!
You’ll wish you had a helmet like this was ice hockey,
I’ll blow you up twice like Hiroshima Nagasaki,
then find a pale horse and make you the jockey,
I’ll skewer your ass like you were souvlaki,
or to honor your heritage, I may go teriyaki.
Either way your cooked, your match is done,
Cage is gone. You're gone, your team’s down to one.
Vasillis Knight, you’re a former champion, let’s have some fun.
My foot to your face, your bell just got rung,
Denada plus nil is what your teammates brung,
and now you have to face Thing 2 and Thing 1.
You haven’t a chance isn’t that obvious,
Youre better off to go hire a lobbyist,
to convince the bosses that youre not just a hobbyist,
the S in ASU it stands for Sloppiness,
The ASU crew is really lame
The ASU crew has got no game,
The ASU crew is only one ‘S’ from having ‘ass’ in your name,
I saw and I conquered just after I came,
not that kind of came, get your mind out the gutter,
the match took 9 seconds because the ref had a stutter,
to beat me is hard, like a diamond cutter,
to beat you was easy, like a hot knife through butter,
now walk to the back hang your head low and mutter,
how it wasn’t fair because your teammates blew head,
and how everything is true that I just said,
Cage is a ghost, it’s like he’s dead.
Iwatani, is he even in this fed?
They left you alone behind the proverbial woodshed,
and with Wilds and Geisel the damage is widespread.
Now that damage is done our victory complete,
your team was a joke and they got easily beat,
you’re not on our level, you can barely compete.
If we see each other again try to stay on your feet,
If we see each other again, it will be a repeat.
If we see each other again you’d be wise to retreat.
If we see each other again keep your ass kicking receipt.