Post by Kendra Watterson on Oct 15, 2018 0:32:16 GMT -5
"FIRE, RAIN AND ROTTEN BANANAS"
We see Kendra, Sam and their father Mr. Watterson in a dark smokey room. The smoke in fact coming from Sam and Mr. Watterson themselves smoking cigars as Kendra is hitting the punching bag in her ring gear. She coughs as she continues punching the bag.
Kendra: Dad... is the loads of smoke really necessary? It's burning my eyes and my throat while I work out...
Sam: Absolutely necessary, Sis.
Mr. Watterson: Yes. Sure is.
He says as he blows a cloud of smoke in his daughters face.
Kendra (coughing): Really, it doesn't seem like it's needed...
Mr. Watterson: IT IS GOD DAMN IT! AND DON'T CALL ME, REALLY! I am father or Mr. Watterson to you missy. Now keep punching.
Sam: You never know what you will run into in Seattle for this Carnage show. It's a filthy, filthy city. Haven't you ever heard a single Pearl Jam grunge song? It's all about smoking cigars and stabbing young pretty women with a sharpened toothbrush, such as yourself Kenny.
Kendra: I... I don't think that's true. I'm no music expert but I think you got your bands mixed up.
Sam looks through his ipod. And nods when he finds the song he was looking for.
Sam: Yep. My bad. I got Pearl Jam mixed up with the Metal band, "Cigar Smoking Women Stabbers." I think they come from Seattle though... which makes my first point valid.
Sam starts scratching is amputated leg stump fiercely causing a unpleasant smell.
Kendra: C'mon, Bro. This is disgusting... You're going to get that, um, leg?... infected again. Don't scratch, put some cream on it or something. Dad. Sam is being gross.
She looks over at her father who is hawking up some phlegm due to the heavy cigar smoking. With a loud SPLAT sound it falls to the floor out of his mouth. He looks at his daughter confused.
Mr. Watterson: Ahhh? What did you say, darling? Don't worry I hear urine is great for flushing out the poison and cleansing the wound... move away.
Kendra's father than rushes over to his one footed son and proceeds to urinate on his stump leg. Kendra looks a way disturbed.
Kendra: Gross, dad! C'mon guys... this isn't right... that's only for snake bites or something... there is no snake... guys!
Mr. Watterson: No snake you say, huh? What about that pack of pythons over there...
Mr. Watterson points to a bunch of bananas rotting in the corner, making its own unique stench.
Kendra: Those are clear as day, rotten stinky old bananas, dad.
Mr. Watterson: Then why are they hissing at me.... ughhhh.
Mr. Watterson begins dry heaving to the point where his son, Sam, cups his hands under his mouth potentially to catch whatever comes out.
Sam: I got ya Dad... I think... I think... I think the urine... it's making it more itchy. Kendra... maybe you should pee on it too. Just to make sure... if you can't go, have some of my 2liter jug of Apple juice over there. That'll do it, sis!
Kendra: GUYS! I am not pissing on your leg, Sam. Dad... put it away. This is too creepy. And I hate to do this... but I think I'm going to go for a quick jog... alone. I have this huge match at Carnage that I need to be mentally prepared for. And honestly. I appreciate you helping out with your best intentions. But the smell in his barn is disgusting, those bananas are making me sick. Not to mention the smoke, gagging and urination won't help me win the battle royal. I think it's better if we just take a break, you guys chill out here. And i'll just go for a quick jog...
Mr. Watterson: What are you saying?
Sam: Yeah, what you sayin' sis?
Mr. Watterson: Yeah, whatchu sayin' daught?
Sam; Yeah, what you be sayin' to us, Kenny?
Mr. Watterson: Yeah, what are you tryin' to be sayin' now?
Sam: YEAH!
Kendra(shouting): GUYS! ENOUGH! I'm saying i'm going to work out the rest of the day by myself... I am sorry...
Kendra grabs her ipod, jug of water, a piece of paper and a towel and heads out the door jogging.
Sam: Hmmm... that wasn't very nice of her...
Mr. Watterson: No she is right...
Sam: Kendra is our last hope, dad.
Mr. Watterson: No... there is another....
Sam: Another what? Kendra? She has a TWIN!?!?!
Mr. Watterson: Huh? Nevermind. Where is that 2 liter jug of apple juice...
Mr. Watterson rushes over to the jug of juice and pours it down his mouth as Sam watches on scratching his stump.
40 MINUTES LATER
We see Kendra jogging in a park punching the air as she runs. She takes a seat on a bench in the small park. She takes a drink of water as she pulls out the piece of paper. On it. The participants in the CBS Showcase Battle Royal. She looks it over while drinking and talking to herself.
Kendra: Okay... so we got Chris Eno... I wonder if his family is the creator of that stomach pill? Or is that Uno? One of them is a game and one of them is to help us burp. Either way, I gotta watch out for this guy. He seems legit. Ms. Monster. Well... she is just scary. Scary works sometimes. She reminds me of something that would haunt me in my nightmares. Like the killer in Nightmare On Elm Street. Crazy Scissor Hand Man was his name. Hopefully she has regular hands and not knife fingers. Her profile doesn't really state that she does or doesn't. Which is kind of odd. Speaking of Odd. Odd is odd. He creeps me out too.
Kendra gets cold shivers thinking of Odd as she continues looking at the list.
Kendra: Frankie Harewood. Now this guy seems legit. Boxing background, nice. Seems like he might be the most serious threat in this match. Taking pro wrestling very seriously. I like that. I'm gonna keep my eye on you good sir. Then we got Hajeet, Petrov and Ultimate Destroyer. Damn. This is going to get real. All seem capable foes. I mean i'm sure like me, they are a bit bummed that we're on the CBS broadcast and not the official Pay Per View. But this is Carnage... and I will bring all that I can to these fine athletes. The Watterson name will be known throughout the industry. And not just because of our infamous Watterson versus BEE trial that never came to justice. I guess even in 2018 you can't sue a the bee! Stupid law. No! The Watterson name will be famous because I Kendra Watterson will become the biggest star in Action Wrestling today!
A little girl and her mother walk pass Kendra who is now standing on the bench talking out loud to herself.
Little Girl(pointing at Kendra): Mommy! Mommy! That retarded lady is talking to herself!
Mother: It's not nice to point and stare at them, hunny. And god forbid you show them some cake.
Kendra: No, no, no ladies. I am not a mentally challenged mongoloid. I am a pro wrestler, here in Seattle for this A.W. Carnage show. Sure, the doctor said I have a learning disability due to the heavy smoking and drinking my mother drove into her body when carrying me. But I'm sure your mommy did the same thing with you.
Mother: Never... please stop talking to us. Suzy, let's go...
Kendra: Nice to meet you Suzy! And when I become a huge A.W. star, i'll be sure to give you an autograph sometime!!! Now, I just have to prepare myself for the battle royal on CBS. Where Family matters again... and...
She puts in her Ipod ear plugs as FIRE and RAIN by James Taylor starts to play. She sits down dramatically with a sad face. She looks in the sky thinking of her father and brother.
Kendra: Family.... Matters... Again... What have I done? I need them... they need me... I also need them. Wait I just said that... we need each other. SAM! DADDY! I'M COMING BACK!!!
She takes off running and into the grass where she steps into a pile of dog crap. She looks at her sneakers and begins smearing it into the grass as she begins running back to the ol' training barn.
LATER
Kendra runs into the barn all sweaty and tired, also shoes reeking of dog crap. She takes a deep breath and opens her eyes. To her surprise she finds no one in the smelly barn but the punching bag creaking back and forth. And the smell of urine and rotten bananas hitting her in the nose like a brick wall.
Kendra: Damn... I missed them! I pissed them off so much that they took a plane back to Newfoundland. Adopted another daughter to train and to let her pee on them to disinfect a amputated foot. I blew it...
Sam: Hey Kendra...
Kendra heard her brothers voice from behind her. She spun around to see her father and brother eating beans and wieners from a can with their bare hands. Sloppily putting the food into their mouths. Making a mess.
Kendra: I'm so happy to see you guys didn't ditch me. I'm sorry about earlier. I think we make a great team and you know... um... guys... we have money you know? We can afford, um, real food? Not cans of pork and beans...
Mr. Watterson: Yeah... we know. We used that MONEY to BUY the BEANS and WEENIES ! Understando englas-ious?
Sam(laughing): Hilarious dad...
Mr. Watterson tosses a can of beans to Kendra. Who looks at them suspiciously .
Kendra: You did remember to wash your hands, right? You know after pissing on each other and picking scabs with your hands right?
Sam and Mr. Watterson laugh awkwardly as they dig in to their cans with their filthy fingers.
Sam: Sure did.
Mr. Watterson: Yep...
Kendra: Cool...
Kendra shrugs and joins them sitting on the dirty barn floor as it pans out to a wide shot of them. Continues to zoom to where they are out of focus and the rotten bananas are as clear as day, just as a snake slithers around the fruit. The scene fades with FIRE AND RAIN by James Taylor.