Post by Gerard Angelo on Apr 7, 2024 5:27:56 GMT -5
(The following video was posted to X @thegerardangelo)
I’ve reached a point in my career where I only care about the main events and the World Championship. If it is neither of those things, I don’t give a fuck. Last week I wasn’t booked so I didn’t show up. I’m too big of a star to pack my bags and travel out of my way to the arena just for them not to put me on the show. I ain’t like the rest of y’all who need to beg that fuckface Brady Bolt for TV time. You want my star power on your show? You book me properly and promote it. You want an interview? You be like Jade and call my publicist to set it up.
I’m a future fucking Hall of Famer for this place. I should be getting treated like one. Not thrown into random multi-man tag matches. I had to watch as an Action Wrestling PLE main event was Teo Blaze vs Jaice Wilds. That’s a real thing that happened and not a fever dream. You’d think they’d want to make some motherfucking money and give the top guy his rematch instead of booking for the niche internet audience that wanted to chant fight forever at two vanilla midgets.
I know some dipshit is saying “Well ackshully, you have the All-In briefcase.” That’s not the fucking point. I’ve never gotten a fair one-on-one rematch for any title I’ve lost here in ADub. Instead, they make me jump through hoop after hoop trying to get back to my spot that they keep trying to fill with people that can’t handle the goddamned role. It’s like they're trying to humble me because they don’t want me to be the face of the company and by they I mean middle managers like Brady Bolt and his ilk. I’m very much the face of Action Wrestling which means I’m the face of the business and no jealous geek with a bad haircut will ever change that.
But this week isn't about that mush-mouthed idiot. It’s about the Road to Havoc tournament, Jesus fucking Christ, Brady loves tournaments so much you’d think he owned an NFL team in Florida but I digress. This week on Clash I face off against two well-decorated competitors. Jessie Lee and Karlie Nash.
You’re quite the difficult one to figure out, Karlie. You say you don’t care but yet you continue to show up week after week. Sometimes you want championships other times all you’re worried about is getting your box licked by a bitch with wrinkles. Are you a superior athlete or are you a cult leader? No wonder you’re stuck in a fucking rut. You can't even decide who you are on any given day. You might as well retire and go film smut films with TFK.
Now, I’m sure you’re trying to do the Leo meme and point at me saying I’m in a rut after big-time losses to Teo and Odin but here’s the thing, even on my worst day I’m still better than you. You’ve been here fighting the good fight from the beginning, Karlie, and I became a literal legend not even six months into my tenure here. Without Nikola, you’re a fucking joke. Sure you can win a couple of Women’s Championships here and there but that title comes and goes as much as Jessica Cannon.
Talk to me when you’re winning a World title, or even competing for one. There are levels to this shit, Karlie, and you’re a thousand percent not on mine nor are you on the level below me. If you knew what was good for you, you’d stay in Minnesota and scissor with a soccer mom. You don’t want this fucking smoke.
Jessie Lee, the girl ADub tried to make a thing so bad I’m surprised they didn’t change your name to Fetch. I’m deadass, I’ve never seen someone do so little with so many opportunities. Yet, you kept getting them like you had a picture of Pasternak pissing on a litter of puppies. How many Hardcore title shots did you get? CBS title? United States? Television? I’m sure you’ll say something fucking dumb like “It’s not my fault I’m bloody great” or some shit without realizing how protected you are here, Jess. You’re like a GM’s first-round draft pick. Somebody high up so some potential and staked their reputation on ya so you’re gonna get shot after shot until you either stumble into your potential on accident or they quietly release you. When you don’t succeed in one division they move you around until you win something so they can go “SEE?!?!” despite your batting average being below the Mendoza line.
You were supposed to be somebody already. People were supposed to pop when they so you and go “Hey that’s Jessie Lee.” Now they just go “Oh that’s Jessie Lee.” Whatever happened to that little faction you had? I’ve had shits that lasted longer than you tailor-made dorks. Just another thing Jessie Lee failed at I guess. I at least thought you’d be the one to think you’re too good for those two doofuses but hey even the GOAT is wrong sometimes. I bring this up to show just how lackluster you’ve been. I may be in a cold streak but you’ve been locked in the freezer you’re entire ADub career. The only thing we have in common is we both let that geriatric fuck Odin beat us in Match Madness. I promise you, I ain’t losing to the front office’s pet project.
I’m moving on in this tournament. I’m making my way to Havoc and winning the damn thing like I should’ve last year. I’m going to main event Evolution and go down in history as the greatest wrestler in the history of Action Wrestling. Because that’s the Hollywood Ending I deserve.
I’ve reached a point in my career where I only care about the main events and the World Championship. If it is neither of those things, I don’t give a fuck. Last week I wasn’t booked so I didn’t show up. I’m too big of a star to pack my bags and travel out of my way to the arena just for them not to put me on the show. I ain’t like the rest of y’all who need to beg that fuckface Brady Bolt for TV time. You want my star power on your show? You book me properly and promote it. You want an interview? You be like Jade and call my publicist to set it up.
I’m a future fucking Hall of Famer for this place. I should be getting treated like one. Not thrown into random multi-man tag matches. I had to watch as an Action Wrestling PLE main event was Teo Blaze vs Jaice Wilds. That’s a real thing that happened and not a fever dream. You’d think they’d want to make some motherfucking money and give the top guy his rematch instead of booking for the niche internet audience that wanted to chant fight forever at two vanilla midgets.
I know some dipshit is saying “Well ackshully, you have the All-In briefcase.” That’s not the fucking point. I’ve never gotten a fair one-on-one rematch for any title I’ve lost here in ADub. Instead, they make me jump through hoop after hoop trying to get back to my spot that they keep trying to fill with people that can’t handle the goddamned role. It’s like they're trying to humble me because they don’t want me to be the face of the company and by they I mean middle managers like Brady Bolt and his ilk. I’m very much the face of Action Wrestling which means I’m the face of the business and no jealous geek with a bad haircut will ever change that.
But this week isn't about that mush-mouthed idiot. It’s about the Road to Havoc tournament, Jesus fucking Christ, Brady loves tournaments so much you’d think he owned an NFL team in Florida but I digress. This week on Clash I face off against two well-decorated competitors. Jessie Lee and Karlie Nash.
You’re quite the difficult one to figure out, Karlie. You say you don’t care but yet you continue to show up week after week. Sometimes you want championships other times all you’re worried about is getting your box licked by a bitch with wrinkles. Are you a superior athlete or are you a cult leader? No wonder you’re stuck in a fucking rut. You can't even decide who you are on any given day. You might as well retire and go film smut films with TFK.
Now, I’m sure you’re trying to do the Leo meme and point at me saying I’m in a rut after big-time losses to Teo and Odin but here’s the thing, even on my worst day I’m still better than you. You’ve been here fighting the good fight from the beginning, Karlie, and I became a literal legend not even six months into my tenure here. Without Nikola, you’re a fucking joke. Sure you can win a couple of Women’s Championships here and there but that title comes and goes as much as Jessica Cannon.
Talk to me when you’re winning a World title, or even competing for one. There are levels to this shit, Karlie, and you’re a thousand percent not on mine nor are you on the level below me. If you knew what was good for you, you’d stay in Minnesota and scissor with a soccer mom. You don’t want this fucking smoke.
Jessie Lee, the girl ADub tried to make a thing so bad I’m surprised they didn’t change your name to Fetch. I’m deadass, I’ve never seen someone do so little with so many opportunities. Yet, you kept getting them like you had a picture of Pasternak pissing on a litter of puppies. How many Hardcore title shots did you get? CBS title? United States? Television? I’m sure you’ll say something fucking dumb like “It’s not my fault I’m bloody great” or some shit without realizing how protected you are here, Jess. You’re like a GM’s first-round draft pick. Somebody high up so some potential and staked their reputation on ya so you’re gonna get shot after shot until you either stumble into your potential on accident or they quietly release you. When you don’t succeed in one division they move you around until you win something so they can go “SEE?!?!” despite your batting average being below the Mendoza line.
You were supposed to be somebody already. People were supposed to pop when they so you and go “Hey that’s Jessie Lee.” Now they just go “Oh that’s Jessie Lee.” Whatever happened to that little faction you had? I’ve had shits that lasted longer than you tailor-made dorks. Just another thing Jessie Lee failed at I guess. I at least thought you’d be the one to think you’re too good for those two doofuses but hey even the GOAT is wrong sometimes. I bring this up to show just how lackluster you’ve been. I may be in a cold streak but you’ve been locked in the freezer you’re entire ADub career. The only thing we have in common is we both let that geriatric fuck Odin beat us in Match Madness. I promise you, I ain’t losing to the front office’s pet project.
I’m moving on in this tournament. I’m making my way to Havoc and winning the damn thing like I should’ve last year. I’m going to main event Evolution and go down in history as the greatest wrestler in the history of Action Wrestling. Because that’s the Hollywood Ending I deserve.