Post by Jessie Lee on Mar 10, 2024 13:01:54 GMT -5
'EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY YO!
We DID IT, ladies an' gents!
We ~and I mean ME~ beat that silver-tongued serpent that is Cipher and have OFFiCIALLY moved on to the second round of the March Madness tournament! I'd be lyin' through my teeth if I said I wasn't excited!
However!
The REAL work begins now if I want to make it to rounds three an' four.
An' I'm fuckin' HERE for it!
But the question is; are you?
We DID IT, ladies an' gents!
We ~and I mean ME~ beat that silver-tongued serpent that is Cipher and have OFFiCIALLY moved on to the second round of the March Madness tournament! I'd be lyin' through my teeth if I said I wasn't excited!
However!
The REAL work begins now if I want to make it to rounds three an' four.
An' I'm fuckin' HERE for it!
But the question is; are you?
Victory.
It was one of the sweetest things a girl could get when entrenched in such a highly competitive business. But do you know what made it better? When that girl's boyfriend decided to surprise her with a date to celebrate! And so, that is where we find our favorite belligerent young Gothie Aussie, clad in a fancy black dress while her golden retriever boyfriend sat across from her; a genuinely happy smile on his face.
"You didn't have to do this, Micheal, really," Jessie said with a touch of nervousness in her voice; a rush of emotions swirling within.
"Momsense! After that performance last Monday, how could I not take you out for a celebration?" Micheal replied with a comforting squeeze of his hand.
"Thanks," she said with a smile "Pretty sure I still got bruises in some spots."
"Oh? I might be able to help with those." he said in the most obvious cheesy tone that got a laugh out of her. However, the flirtatious time was not to last as things were about to take a turn on an otherwise happy evening.
ODIN BALFORE!
The WORLD CHAMPION that Action Wrestling NEEDS!
Just like he was the TAG TEAM CHAMPION that Action Wrestling NEEDS.
An' the UNITED STATES CHAMPION.....
An' the TELEVISION CHAMPION......
Is anyone else sensing a pattern in your flagrant bullshit or is it just me? Other than your very CLEAR and PRESENT problem with simply being just ANOTHER casual belt mark that hasn't EVER added to the legacies of any of the straps you've had the misfortune of holding. 'Cause, you know, you can't handle the IMMENSE responsibility of reppin' a championship with fire that you SHOULD.
Did you ADD anything to the World strap other than a short twenty-day reign that nobody fuckin' remembers?
What about the Television strap ~the one that I JUST REBUILT THE DIVISION of~? Did you ADD anything to it OTHER than the fact that Jolee kept kickin' your ass; outclassin' YOU, the MIGHTY ALL-FATHER.
How about the United States strap; the one you got by puttin' that fat fuck Sitcom on the shelf for? Did you contribute ANYTHING to that or did you just let Doc, the guy I BEAT so badly he NEEDED to challenge a retired Thaddeus King to soothe his broken ego, drop a fuckin' Pepsi machine on you for shits an' giggles?
See the issue yet, mate?
Action Wrestling doesn't NEED Odin Balfore; Odin Balfore NEEDS Action Wrestling.
You can verbally swing your dick whichever way you want an' you can try to melt the brains of the fans with the toddler-like ramblings that you're known for as many times as you like. However, the fact remains that you've never been anything more than the sticky afterbirth from WCF that we've just never been able to rid ourselves of. Maybe it's because my critical comprehension skills are higher than those of a primary schooler, but I don't think you've made nearly a difference in this company like you THINK you have. In fact, with the exceptions of beatin' WALTER and Sitcom, you're what most would consider a BENCHWARMER at best.
Need a quick team to hold the Tag Team straps for a hot minute?
Call Balfore!
Need someone to hold the Television strap till someone reliable appears?
Get Balfore!
Need someone with a World strap to their name to help fill out a tournament in a division that's otherwise too fuckin' shallow?
Odin. Balfore.
Fuck, the ONLY reason you're IN this tournament is 'cause Corey Black ain't HERE. You didn't EARN it by doin' anythin' SPECIAL that ya haven't done before; you didn't WORK your ass off to PROVE that you're THE GUY THAT ACTION WRESTLING NEEDS. You were just AROUND doin' the same ol' worn-out shtick that's carried you since the ONE PLACE where you were EVER important CLOSED.
Fuckin' PATHETIC.
But hey; here's a thought!
Instead of BEGGING Torture for better booking slots how about you BE that big bad bastard an' BECOME the guy that Action Wrestling can't SURVIVE without. You've got the fuckin' chance right here! All you HAVE to do is BEAT ME, then either Addy or Gerrie, 'fore the finals.
Quit actin' like a semi-sober ZMac an' just fuckin' DO IT.
'cept you WON'T.
'Cause ya CAN'T.
The WORLD CHAMPION that Action Wrestling NEEDS!
Just like he was the TAG TEAM CHAMPION that Action Wrestling NEEDS.
An' the UNITED STATES CHAMPION.....
An' the TELEVISION CHAMPION......
Is anyone else sensing a pattern in your flagrant bullshit or is it just me? Other than your very CLEAR and PRESENT problem with simply being just ANOTHER casual belt mark that hasn't EVER added to the legacies of any of the straps you've had the misfortune of holding. 'Cause, you know, you can't handle the IMMENSE responsibility of reppin' a championship with fire that you SHOULD.
Did you ADD anything to the World strap other than a short twenty-day reign that nobody fuckin' remembers?
What about the Television strap ~the one that I JUST REBUILT THE DIVISION of~? Did you ADD anything to it OTHER than the fact that Jolee kept kickin' your ass; outclassin' YOU, the MIGHTY ALL-FATHER.
How about the United States strap; the one you got by puttin' that fat fuck Sitcom on the shelf for? Did you contribute ANYTHING to that or did you just let Doc, the guy I BEAT so badly he NEEDED to challenge a retired Thaddeus King to soothe his broken ego, drop a fuckin' Pepsi machine on you for shits an' giggles?
See the issue yet, mate?
Action Wrestling doesn't NEED Odin Balfore; Odin Balfore NEEDS Action Wrestling.
You can verbally swing your dick whichever way you want an' you can try to melt the brains of the fans with the toddler-like ramblings that you're known for as many times as you like. However, the fact remains that you've never been anything more than the sticky afterbirth from WCF that we've just never been able to rid ourselves of. Maybe it's because my critical comprehension skills are higher than those of a primary schooler, but I don't think you've made nearly a difference in this company like you THINK you have. In fact, with the exceptions of beatin' WALTER and Sitcom, you're what most would consider a BENCHWARMER at best.
Need a quick team to hold the Tag Team straps for a hot minute?
Call Balfore!
Need someone to hold the Television strap till someone reliable appears?
Get Balfore!
Need someone with a World strap to their name to help fill out a tournament in a division that's otherwise too fuckin' shallow?
Odin. Balfore.
Fuck, the ONLY reason you're IN this tournament is 'cause Corey Black ain't HERE. You didn't EARN it by doin' anythin' SPECIAL that ya haven't done before; you didn't WORK your ass off to PROVE that you're THE GUY THAT ACTION WRESTLING NEEDS. You were just AROUND doin' the same ol' worn-out shtick that's carried you since the ONE PLACE where you were EVER important CLOSED.
Fuckin' PATHETIC.
But hey; here's a thought!
Instead of BEGGING Torture for better booking slots how about you BE that big bad bastard an' BECOME the guy that Action Wrestling can't SURVIVE without. You've got the fuckin' chance right here! All you HAVE to do is BEAT ME, then either Addy or Gerrie, 'fore the finals.
Quit actin' like a semi-sober ZMac an' just fuckin' DO IT.
'cept you WON'T.
'Cause ya CAN'T.
"FU~TILE TO RESIST! FU~TILE TO RESIST!"
"Daryl! Would you settle down, you're embarrassing us!"
"FU~TILE TO RESIST"
"Daryl, honey, PLEASE stop."
"FU~TILE T-"
"OH WOULD YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Jessie shouted; turning in her chair to face the drunken fellow who had her upcoming opponent's entrance bit on repeat in low IQ brain. The man, in all his smelly glory, dared to act offended by her reaction to his otherwise obvious intentional provocation. I mean, why else would you ruin someone else's night unless it was on purpose? Because you were a moron? Wait, he was doing the Balfore chant so both easily track.
"Honey, list-"
"No!" Daryl bellowed as he pushed himself away from his table to stand; swaying dangerously "Dis bitch don't wanna listen to the All-Father! She's just some brainless emo bimbo that don't know what REAL shit is! Kinda like you! When was the last time you su-"
THWACK!
IN an eye-opening display of speed and agility, Jessie had sprang to her feet, closed the distance, and knocked Daryl flat on his ass with a swift punch to the nose! How scandalous!
"Listen here, ya egomaniacal fuck," Jessie said sternly "I couldn't give two shits if you're an Odin Balfore fan, but don't be a self-centered jackass, yeah? Your delusional idol might be able to get away with it, but you ain't a seven-foot-tall force of nature. But ya gotta understand that I don't have ANY problem committing Violence Against Nature." Ready and willing to throw hands, Jessie brought her arm back to throw another punch as Daryl aimlessly sputtered something behind the blood pouring from his broken nose.
"C'mon now, Jess," Micheal said as he gently pulled his date away from the situation "He ain't worth it. Save for the dude that makes it okay to act like a dumbass. Beat the hell out of Odin and knock him out of the tournament."
"Oh, you don't have to worry about that," she growled as she allowed herself to be led away "It's just ANOTHER reason to take him down."
"Again."
"Again." she said in agreement.
Don't get it twisted now.
I ain't sayin' that you don't have the physical capability to beat the shit outta me or to knock me the fuck out. 'Cause ya do an' I REMEMBER EVERY we're been in; even the one where I BEAT you. So, much like with DRAUGR, I UNDERSTAND very well what sort of fight I'm walkin' into Monday Night at Coca-Cola Coliseum; a right fine name for a buildin', eh? I know that it'll be "FUTILE TO RESIST" but the simple fuckin' fack is that I just don't CARE.
Not about the shit you have to SAY.
Not about what you THINK.
'Cause, unlike YOU, I ain't COMPLACENT on where they put me on the card. I ain't lookin' to be that BENCHWARMER they can just socket in whenever some whiny cunt realizes they can't handle the PRESSURE of Action Wrestling an' bails. Yet, MORE THAN ANYTHING, I want to be the ONE that Action Wrestlin' NEEDS when shit NEEDS to be done; when all their "pillars" fuckin' leave for the umpteenth time an' they someone to CARRY the company.
I WANT to be the ONE you THINK you are.
Fuck it.
I AM that cunt.
Whether YOU, Addy, Gerrie, or ANY motherfucker on the other side of the brackets wants to admit it or not, I have shown TIME and TIME AGAIN that I AM just that. For MONTHS I MADE the United States strap worth watching an' I WASN"T even the champion. I, just a few weeks ago, MADE the TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP an' MADE EVERY CHALLENGER BETTER. I'M the ONE out here making the ENTIRE COMPANY BETTER.
I CAN'T BE STOPPED.
I WON'T BE STOPPED.
So BEAT me ~END my world with a RAGNAROK~ but you haven't a fuckin' clue WHAT I'm willing to go through to get this opportunity. Mangled flesh an' broken bones are merely the BEGINING and I can assure you that the HUNGER I have to win Monday Night is DEEPER than Fenrir's appetite an' my bite does MORE than KILL GOdS.
It ERASES THEM.
Just like I'm ERASING YOU from March Madness.
I ain't sayin' that you don't have the physical capability to beat the shit outta me or to knock me the fuck out. 'Cause ya do an' I REMEMBER EVERY we're been in; even the one where I BEAT you. So, much like with DRAUGR, I UNDERSTAND very well what sort of fight I'm walkin' into Monday Night at Coca-Cola Coliseum; a right fine name for a buildin', eh? I know that it'll be "FUTILE TO RESIST" but the simple fuckin' fack is that I just don't CARE.
Not about the shit you have to SAY.
Not about what you THINK.
'Cause, unlike YOU, I ain't COMPLACENT on where they put me on the card. I ain't lookin' to be that BENCHWARMER they can just socket in whenever some whiny cunt realizes they can't handle the PRESSURE of Action Wrestling an' bails. Yet, MORE THAN ANYTHING, I want to be the ONE that Action Wrestlin' NEEDS when shit NEEDS to be done; when all their "pillars" fuckin' leave for the umpteenth time an' they someone to CARRY the company.
I WANT to be the ONE you THINK you are.
Fuck it.
I AM that cunt.
Whether YOU, Addy, Gerrie, or ANY motherfucker on the other side of the brackets wants to admit it or not, I have shown TIME and TIME AGAIN that I AM just that. For MONTHS I MADE the United States strap worth watching an' I WASN"T even the champion. I, just a few weeks ago, MADE the TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP an' MADE EVERY CHALLENGER BETTER. I'M the ONE out here making the ENTIRE COMPANY BETTER.
I CAN'T BE STOPPED.
I WON'T BE STOPPED.
So BEAT me ~END my world with a RAGNAROK~ but you haven't a fuckin' clue WHAT I'm willing to go through to get this opportunity. Mangled flesh an' broken bones are merely the BEGINING and I can assure you that the HUNGER I have to win Monday Night is DEEPER than Fenrir's appetite an' my bite does MORE than KILL GOdS.
It ERASES THEM.
Just like I'm ERASING YOU from March Madness.