Spoiler Alert Battlefield
Mar 11, 2023 10:16:03 GMT -5
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Karlie Nash, Teo Blaze, and 1 more like this
Post by T.F.K. on Mar 11, 2023 10:16:03 GMT -5
Lights!
Camera!
ACTION!
Live Crowd: “AC-TION WREST-LING! AC-TION WREST-LING! AC-TION WREST-LING!!!”
The godlike camera runs through the live studio audience while “Moves Like Jagger” by Maroon 5 plays leading to TFK walking onto the stage wearing his sharpest dark blue Armani suit with a red tie, an early throwback to his early US title campaign as an beacon of American Made and Freedom Bred. TFK pulls his hair back into a ponytail and smiles at the crowd on his way to his desk made of mahogany.
Craig Lewis: “Ladies and gentleman, you’ve been without a true voice of the people for far too long and you have been following this industry without a true trajectory… But I, Craig Lewis, TFK’s personal Theatrical Movie Voice Guy, am PLEASED to bring you YOUR DIRECTOR OF ACTION WRESTLING!”
The applause light turns on and the audience clap along and cheer for TFK, who basks in their admiration.
TFK: “Thank you, thank you everyone and thank you Craig for that brilliant introduction as always and yes we are AC-TION WREST-LING, BAY BAY!! And this is TFK’s SPOILER ALERT! We are so pleased to have you with us tonight as we run down the results of our ‘predictions’, deliver upon you a new SPOILER for next week’s Battlefield, and we bring out a new guest for my Casting Couch!”
Craig Lewis: “I’ve got a guest tonight that’s looking to blaze a trail unlike any other, Thad.”
TFK: “Is that right, Craiger?”
Craig Lewis: “Yes, sir, he made a huge statement by jumping from CruiserClash to Clash last week.”
TFK: “You got me sitting on pins and needles, Craiger…”
Craig Lewis: ”He knows how to dress to impress, I can tell you that.”
TFK: “Hmm… Interesting clue.”
TFK rubs his chin.
TFK: “I guess I should’ve really caught up on CruiserClash’s Youtube channel…”
Craig Lewis: “It’s all good, this is why you have me, it seems.”
TFK chuckles.
TFK: “Craiger, you make a great point there.”
Craig Lewis: “I only speak truths.”
TFK: “Seems like it.”
The godlike camera pulls back getting Craig, Thad, and the Casting Couch into frame.
Craig Lewis: “Without further adieu”
TFK sits back in his seat.
Craig Lewis: “Ladies and Gentlemen, let me introduce you to This Is War himself,Doc Holiday and his main man Jens.”
TFK: “Doc and Jens, welcome!”
Craig nods along.
Craig Lewis: “Come on out, fellas!”
“Ambitionz Az A Ridah” by 2Pac plays and from stage left enters Doc and Jens, both dressed in the sharpest Armani that money can buy. They nod to Thad and Craig before looking over the Casting Couch and sitting down.
TFK: "Welcome to the show, Doc and Jens."
Doc: Thanks, pleasures all mine
Jens: Ditto
TFK: Jens, did you end up giving my number to Ferrari at Exchange?
Jens: Your boy recognizes talent and I always share *Fist bumps TFK* It ain't no fun if the homies cant get none! Nawmean
Doc just smirks and shakes his head
TFK: Good man. Now I gotta get to the good stuff, because you know how short of attention spans people have nowadays... Doc, you took Action Wrestling by surprise by jumping from CruiserClash to Clash this past week... Why the change of scenery, sir?"
Doc: Its pretty simple, T. Time is money and I ain't got time to waste with irrelevancy. I'm someone who needs to be on Primetime, not opening up for the main attraction.
TFK: No, I totally get that, but you had some pretty harsh things to say about ZMac, Lissie, Lazaro, Jaice, and the entire CruiserClash roster... Ha, you gotta tell us how you really feel."
TFK chuckles.
Jens: You keep naming names but all I hear is...MID!!!
TFK: Doc, you really gonna let Jens steal all your Thunder here?
Doc: Before I was rudely interrupted. Lets face it...I never took an L, I've never been pinned on CruiserClash. They're all D list actors living out a fantasy that they're still relevant. That just isn't me, I'm a franchise player, the missing puzzle piece, The saving grace!
TFK moves to the edge of his seat.
TFK: I gotta say, you truly mic dropped the Clash roster when you showed up Monday night and I gotta know... Who are you eyeing first?
Jens interrupts again!
Jens: We're going straight to the tiz-op dawg!
Doc: Yo, can you chill for a second?
Jens motions with is hands like he's zipping his mouth shut
Doc: Anyways, obviously the goal is to be World Champion, but I'm a man who knows that there certain steps you gotta take to get there. You gotta pay dues. I think my actions spoke loud enough when I took out Niobe, but after Battlefield, it'll be where ever they think I fit and just keep climbing from there. I might need a tag partner when I make that run, you think you got some gas in the tank?
TFK looks at Craig and laughs.
TFK: Craiger, I think he's talking to you, man.
TFK: Serious though, if I were step back in the ring, it'd be to slap the taste out of CJ Walker's mouth.
Jens: That dudes over the top aggressive, dude needs a dance from Ferrari.
TFK: Come on, Jens, you know CJ couldn't handle Ferrari... He couldn't even handle Craiger. Ha!
Jens: To be fair, it might be what ole Ceej is looking for!
TFK: Now Doc, around here we like to play a little game called, Marry, Fuck, Kill, Cuck, and Film… Are you game?
TFK gives Jens a stern look.
TFK: And I mean, Doc, on this one.
Jens: Got it!
Your choices are... Zombie McMorris, Lissie Hope, Lazaro Vicente, Jaice Wilds, and your opponent this week, Niobe Martin.
Doc: This game be hella weird, only 2 chicks? I guess we fuck Lissie Hope, I have this feeling she's wild in bed, We marry Niobe I guess since she's better looking than Lissie, but shits debatable. We cuck Lazaro, because he's all about his "familia", but probably gets hard thinking about watching a woman getting plowed while he watches. Honestly I would've said Z Mac there but he'd probably make it awkward for all parties involved, so we should probably just film him and market as some fetish shit. It's all about marketing T.
TFK: Yeah, ha, the game isn't for everyone, Doc. So that means you'd kill Jaice Wilds. I'm sure he is on more people's list for that than you'd think. Hahaha.
Doc: Yeah, I knew I was forgetting something, but yeah. He's not really that interesting and aint nobody watching him fuck. I mean if he stepped into The Exchange he might start climbing the poles and swinging from shit like the dancers.
TFK: "I appreciate you coming onto the show, Doc and I wish all the best in creating WAR at Battlefield against Niobe Martin."
Doc straightens his tie and flashes a smile.
Doc: "No luck needed, T, AW knows when it's WAR, I'm running this shit on a whole other level."
Jens: He's a War-Monger, nawmean?
Thad nods and smirks.
TFK: Yes, he most certainly is, Jens."
Craig gives TFK the wrap it up hand gesture.
TFK: Eh-gain, it was a pleasure to have you fellas on the show.
Craig Lewis: “That's right, Thad and I figure it is time to move onto your Spoiler Alert Predictions for this week’s show then, yeah?”
TFK: “Right, uh yeah, but before we get into that, I’d like the AW Universe to see the results of my previous prediction from Clash and CruiserClash Monday 3/6/23. Throw those results up on the screen, Stage Monkeys!”
Clash and CruiserClash 3/6/23 results
Clash and CruiserClash 3/6/23
Main Event
Alister McKissick & Ellie Austin vs. CJ Walker & Tatiana Jolee
Winner: CJ Walker & Tatiana Jolee :I No Contest
I Quit Match
Max Daemon vs. Roddy Zalez
Winner:Max Daemon
Frank Patrick Venable vs. Joey Scala
Winner: FPV
Tyler Walker vs. Niobe Martin
Winner: Niobe Martin
Main Event
Lazaro Vicente vs. Doc Holiday vs. Jaice Wilds
Winner: Lazaro Vicente :I No Contest
201 Championship Open Challenge
_____ vs. Remy Neaveau(c)
Winner: Remy Neaveau :I No Contest
Azurine Vebbins vs. Alex Marley
Winner: Azurine Vebbins
Results: 3/4
Craig Lewis: “Wow, 3 out of 4 thanks to crazy no contests, but I have faith in your abilities here, Thad. I know you will have a clean sweep with this next batch of matches?”
TFK: “Come on, Craiger, I am still a damned professional. Of course I will.”
Craig Lewis: “Do you all believe, Thad has it in him to redeem himself with a clean sweep this week?”
Live Crowd: “WOOOOOOOOO”
TFK:“See, they DO believe, now, Stage Monkeys bring it out!”
The geeky interns roll out a large dry erase board with all of the matches listed on it with names circled with Thad’s choices.
Battlefield
World Championship
ELIMINATION CHAMBER
Sam Kidsgrove vs. Spencer Adams vs. Gerard Angelo vs. Regan Voorhees vs. Addy A vs. Jill Park(c)
Winner: Sam Kidsgrove
Reason: Finish your MOVIE, SAMMY!
Hardcore Championship
Dionysus vs. Downfall(c)
Winner: Downfall
Reason: Downfall is vicious and proven overly so… I’m just not sure if the Dion has his numbers this time around.
Tag Team Championships
No-DQ
Odin Balfore & Corey Black vs. "Light" Wesley & Carter Shaw(c)
Winner: Wesley and Shaw
Reason: I’ve read the writing on the walls at the local Waffle House and it said there will be some underhanded shenanigans and Black and Oldin shouldn’t trust one another… We shall see, hmm….
United States Championship
James Freedom vs. Brandon Leno vs. Jessie Lee vs. Jonny Cedrone vs. Alice Gemini(c)
Winner: James Freedom
Reason: Hands down, The President is what’s best for my precious Action Wrestling United State’s Championship.
Good Housekeeping Match
CJ Walker vs. Ellie Austin
Winner: Ellie Austin
Reason: The knuckle dragging glass jawed idiot, has proven time and time again that he isn’t capable of beating his meat, let alone Ellie Austin.
Cruiserweight Championship
Bryan Blaze vs. Lissie Hope vs. Zombie McMorris(c)
Winner: ZMac
Reason: ZMac butchers the english language as bad as he butchers curtain jerking pleebs… His title reign will not end at Battlefield.
Cruiserweight Tag Team Championships
Two Gents vs. The Undrafted(c)
Winner: The Undrafted
Reason: The Undrafted have proven to be able to go the distance as a team that was reluctantly thrown together and they’re proving their ability to gel together.
Womens Championship
Azurine Vebbins vs. Lissie Hope(c)
Winner: Azurine Vebbins
Reason: It’s Scissoring AZZurine Vebbins walking out and it’s Jergens stock GOING WAY UP!
CBS Championship
Tatiana Jolee vs. Alister McKissick(c)
Winner: Tatiana Jolee
Reason: I saw McKissIT getting his hands on the CBS title, but I didn’t see him having the time to relish in his reign. Jolee isn’t done yet and she’s going to push McKissIT way over his limit.
The Ultimate Challenge
Masks vs. Career
Deathstars vs. Red White & Bruised
Winner: Red, White, & Bruised
Reason: Ms. Nash and crew will become Red, white, and GREENGO after they take those masks off the Deathstars. Watch and see, people!
Television Championship
Frank Patrick Venable vs. Chase Jackson(c)
Winner: FPV
Reason: Frankie came back for titles and it starts with the TV title.
Showtime Championship Unification Match
Showtime Hardcore title vs. Showtime title
Billy Ray Cash(c) vs. Hot Shot Wayne Austin(c)
Winner: Hot Shot Wayne Austin
Reason: Don’t let that sun go down on you, Hot Shot! Keep fighting, boyoh!
201 Championship
Big Harper vs. Remy Neaveau(c)
Winner: Remy Neaveau
Reason: It’s hard to give up on Remy, the kid has heart and he truly believes the 201 Championship means something. He will prove it against Big Harper.
First Blood Match
Lazaro Vicente vs. Jaice Wilds
Winner: Lazaro Vicente
Reason: Lazaro is fighting for his Mami’s sake and I personally wouldn’t want to stand on the other side of a Latino Temper, my friends.
Doc Holiday vs. Niobe Martin
Winner: Doc Holiday
Reason: Doc jumped to Clash and he did it for a reason. He has a chip on his shoulder due to how his tenure on CruiserClash went and he’s going to prove that he’s on Clash to make an impact.
TFK: “The Action Wrestling Universe has a hell of a Monday night for wrasslin coming up on our way to Battlefield and I know I’m really looking forward to it. How about you all?”
Live Crowd: “WOOOOOOOOOO YEAH!!!!”
Craig Lewis: “As the kids say, LET’S GO!!! Ladies and Gentleman, thank you as always for joining us on Action Wrestling's Spoiler Alert. That was your host TFK, Doc Holiday, his main man Jens, and I am as always your loveable sidekick… Um hmm… (Theatrical Voice) CRAIG LEWIS!
TFK: “That’s right and wr will see you all BATTLEFIELD, NOW HIT THE MUSIC, STAGE MONKEYS!”
Moves Like Jagger from Maroon 5 starts to play as TFK starts to dance through the live crowd.
As we fade out to black.