Post by Teo Blaze on Nov 6, 2022 13:54:36 GMT -5
“Love, ladies and gentlemen! That is the subject of our discussion today!”
The words are rather striking, seeming to come from out of nowhere- the scene that opens is a rather peculiar and yet familiar sight, and though the source of the words is as of yet unseen, the viewer is treated nonetheless to a virtual buffet of images and sounds!
“Ah yes, that ever-present, ever sought after little drug that we throw ourselves through hell and back in pursuit of. Take all the prizes in the world, all the fame, glory, and riches, and at the end of the day, what is it without that precious little commodity that we so often take for granted?”
The scene that Teo now finds himself in is now remarkably clear to the viewer: a large fairground within which an elaborate carnival has been laid out. Booths of colorful games and merchandise, large metal rides groaning in the way that can only come from a local carnival, and the red-lensed Cruiserweight champion is practically beaming as his eyes wander over the attractions.
“You know, I’m glad we get to have these little talks- just you and me, you know? And it just so happens that while I was waiting on you, I came across the perfect attraction to discuss it. Watch your head-”
An errant baseball flies almost directly into the camera lens as Teo smiles at the camera, shrugging his shoulders at the apologetic child who lost control of the projectile before gesturing the cameraman to follow.
“I believe it was the great scholar Haddaway who first asked ‘what is love?’ and it’s a question that has struck me ever since I’ve heard it…and truth be told I’d wager that the question has crossed your mind a few times at least as well. Now, I’m not claiming to have an answer to this question, but upon realizing that my opponent for this year’s first round of Turmoil is Adelaide Ainsworth, well…who would I be if I passed up a perfect subject for such a question?
Let’s talk for a moment about dear Addy, why don’t we? The weakest link of that soap opera known as the swallowing- and you know soap opera is the best way to describe that train wreck of a tag team. The tawdry innuendo, the hacky, profanity-laden promos, and the cheap plot twists that anyone with half a brain could see coming from a mile away!!
It’s trash TV, quite frankly, and much like those soap operas, it’s gone on long after anyone stopped caring. Oh! Here we are!”
Teo smiles, walking up to an old classic attraction common at any fairground. A heart-shaped pink tunnel with a swan boat labeled “Tunnel of love” with a flourish, Teo leaps onto the boat, encouraging the cameraman to join him. After a few moments, there’s a loud metallic CLUNK as the boat begins to move into the tunnel.
"But then being second banana to Lissie Hope, the very woman that Addy swore on multiple occasions never to forgive, only to then go crawling back to her the moment that she started to struggle, that’s well trodden ground by this point- we all know that the only thing Addy is swallowing is her pride every time she has to carry Lissie’s bag through the airport.
So the question is why, then? Why would Adelaide Ainsworth continually allow herself to be trotted out like a prize pig each week, and gaslight the fans and herself in the pursuit of a Trios trophy, or another tag belt? Especially when she’s demonstrated that she’s a capable Television Champion?
If why is the question, then Love is the answer.”
Teo, as if on cue, points to one of the exhibits as the boat passes by. A pair of young, animatronic lovers sharing a classic scene, as a young man hands a blushing blonde a red rose. The pair’s doe-eyed expressions conveying an immediate attraction, as much as one can.
“Our self-proclaimed ‘baddest bitch’ would probably never admit this to herself, but the simple fact is that Adelaide Ainsworth desperately, wants to be loved! Adelaide has positioned herself in a way that practically guarantees perpetual isolation, shutting out everyone around her with this facade, this veneer of being too good for anyone, above it all! She’ll tell you without hesitation that she is beyond these pitiful emotions, when in actuality, everything she does betrays just how badly she wants the very thing she shuns!
Adelaide Ainsworth is a fundamentally broken person, so desperately attached, so determined to maintain this persona of being too cool for the room that she actively pushes away everyone around her! Look no further than her time on Cruiserclash for proof positive of that. After being welcomed, cheered, heralded as the next big star, she immediately turned on the same fans that welcomed her with open arms. She had the chance to be the star of the show, to make Cruiserclash into Addyclash, and instead?
She turned on the fans. She took them for granted. So desperate was she to maintain that persona, that she spurned the people who had finally accepted her as something other than a bootlicking, gaslit failure whose momentum was stolen time and time again by the same Lissie Hope who treats Addy like a booty call with every career stall. A toxic cul-de-sac of a friendship that only lasts until something better inevitably comes along!”
As Teo’s voice echoes through the ride, the next exhibit appears, a family now sits around a thanksgiving dinner, their expressions showing a different kind of love- no longer romantic, but now simply a warm feeling of fellowship as they share a meal. Teo grins, looking at the scene before turning back to the camera.
“You see what I mean when I call Addy fundamentally broken? She is someone who claims to be above it all, to be the ‘baddest bitch’ on the roster, to be free of the need to be loved…and yet these cracks appear with every word that spills out of her mouth. Every one night stand, every attempt at seduction, every time she holds that belt above her head, it’s all the same. She wants that warm feeling, to know that there’s someone out there who cares about her.
You’ve got to read between the lines. She may call herself ‘baddest bitch’ but she carries that title not because she wants to be hated, or feared, but because she wants to be recognized, acknowledge, I daresay even…loved? To know that she’s the one that people can’t quit, that others care enough about her that she can mistreat them and they’ll still come crawling back.
And she will let you know it, too. She will bandy about every title defense, every victory, she will loudly proclaim the Swallowing to be the greatest tag team in Action Wrestling history!”
Teo chuckles as the ride approaches the next exhibit.
“I knew Addy was freaky, but who’d have guessed she was such a big fan of autofellatio?
It reeks of desperation, of insecurity. No true champion should have to remind people of their accomplishments. No champion should have to brag about the number of days they’ve held the belt, and most importantly, the ‘baddest bitch’ on the roster should not give a god damn whether anyone acknowledges them.
But you do, don’t you Addy?”
The tunnel of love approaches its final exhibit, an animatronic, looking eerily similar to the very woman that Teo has been talking about, looking into a mirror. Unlike the first two exhibits, where the faces were smiled, the Addy lookalike’s face is etched with a profound sadness as she considers her own reflection.
Teo steps out from the boat onto the stage, and for a brief moment, the expression on his face drifts to almost sympathetic…before returning to the serious stare.
“Let me be very clear, Adelaide. When I look at you, I don’t see someone who is malicious, cruel, sadistic. I don’t see a killer that needs to be stopped. I see someone who deeply, on a fundamental level, does not know what she wants. All of this grandstanding, this persona, your desperate bouncing from division to division, from show to show? It tells me that you have no control, no idea what you actually want. Right now that Television Title allows you to see yourself as a champion, and you have found some comfort in it. But there’s still that voice in the back of your head, still that little insecurity who won’t let you forget about each past failure, each time that it all came crashing down around you.
You’re running, Adelaide. Fleeing something inside yourself, looking for any distraction you can find, any way to stretch that persona you have built for yourself.
A paper tiger, telling the world how vicious she is while desperately trying to hide the fragility that lies beneath the bravado.
Because you know that even as people grant you accolades, friendship, even if the whole world decided that they would be able to meet you on your own terms, to finally accept Adelaide Ainsworth for who she is unconditionally!
That you know you would screw it up. It is what you do. It is what always happens, Addy.”
Teo takes a deep breath, walking back towards the boat.
“And this? This is Turmoil. This is, bar none, the hardest, most unforgiving tournament this company has. You cannot afford to be broken, Addy.
Because people will always capitalize on it. Sharks smell blood and they attack, nothing else. And your weakness will be exposed in this tournament.
You’ll make excuses. You’ll whine. You’ll lash out. But it will happen nonetheless. And people around the world will shake their heads and wonder why they ever bothered wanting to love someone who clearly won’t allow herself to accept it.
It’s almost tragic, when you think about it.
But then, I can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be saved.”
Teo exhales deeply, sitting back down as he seems to consider the exhibits, rolling his words over in his mind.
“This match, Addy, it’s a reminder. For you, for the world. It’s a reminder that your latest reinvention, your desperate run as Television champion? It’s just another ploy. A way to try and gain the acceptance and love you claim to be above.
After all, we can’t change what we are, can we?
You can put on all the different faces you want, but it always comes through in the end.
You’ll still be Adelaide Ainsworth.
And that still won’t be good enough.”
As Teo finishes, the boat leaves towards the exit, the camera fading as it turns towards the final exhibit one last time.
