Post by Tatiana on Oct 16, 2022 11:44:37 GMT -5
You wanna talk about Action Wrestling, then it all starts with the one championship that matters the most - The AW Television Title - Yeah, I know you’re rolling those eyes right now, probably telling yourself that Gerrard Angelo’s World Title or perhaps Jill Park’s United States Championship are the upper tier of this juggernaut promotion
See, we do live event's every week. We travel the United States and occasionally the GREAT and BEAUTIFUL country of Canada - we draw HUGE crowds and generate massive amounts of fanfare. But at the end of the day, we’re still a television-based company which draws much of its revenue through TV rights
We draw huge numbers, which attracts sponsors and stimulates PPV buys. And though we do make a ton of money at the gate - it PALES in comparison to what we get from Television. That’s not hyperbole, it’s the truth - you can look it up all you want… And so, the TELEVISION Title is the TOP Title in the federation.
Whatmore, everyone has a quote/unquote “World” Title - Most have a regional championship. But few have a TELEVISION Title - nor the capacity to draw the sort of numbers that we do here in AW, therefore the ACTION WRESTLING TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP is the TOP title to hold in this media powerhouse.
Ah… And that brings me to our television show, Monday Night Clash where your FAVOURITE Canadian hero will go into a battle against that one guy from Mortal Kombat and somebody called… Nibole?
Whatever… It’s whatever. That’s not important, nor is her generic high-flier approach to pro wrestling. I’m not impressed with your tight outfit, your pink hair, or your stupid name. And that nickname… “The Living Nightmare” ... What the frick is that supposed to be? You’re not all that scary looking, unless of course you’re talking about the way you made your poor father feel in your junior year of high school.
At least Kano has a more serious approach to this business that I’ve busted my ass to contribute to for the past 23 years. I know I joke about him being in the OG Mortal Kombat… And to be honest - that outfit doesn’t help matters. But at least he isn’t a vapid, pink haired wannabe rip-off of just about everyone’s worst and most boring CAW wrestler in AW 2k21. She’s what you get when you go with the default template and then dress it up with some pink hair and a slutty outfit.
Sorry (not sorry)
Kano, you at least try to do good by yourself in this business. You’ve got some international clout and a reputation for being hard-nosed. I got a pretty good read on you last week, and if we’re being real right now… This thing is going to come down to me and you, pal. The two biggest, best warriors clashing on the big stage for the RIGHTS to challenge for the TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP!
Just like Nublets, you’re a clown… And I don’t mean like Bozo the clown, either - somehow that dude is over (WHY!?) - no, no… I mean like a juggling fool looking to fall on his ass. And because I’m so accommodating, I’m going to help you do just that while making you “TV Famous” for twenty-odd minutes. You should be thanking me; I’m going to actually make you look like you belong in the same ring as myself and generic Barbie (Barbloe?) … But it’s all just for show - at the end of the day, I'm gonna plow my foot so far up your jabroni ass that you’ll have to have my shoelaces untied from your tonsils by your orthodontist.
I’m sick and freckin’ TIRED of being in this purposeless loop around here and complaining about that trash isn’t doing me any favors. So, I’m taking matters into my own hands. On Clash, I’m going out there to absolutely absolve Nibole and Kano of any reasonable claim to MY Television Championship - and then, I’m going to slap Addy-A around like a rockem’ sockem’ robot to reclaim the MOST important and influential championship in the HISTORY of professional wrestling.
The TV Title BELONGS around my perfect Canadian waist - it’s a part of MY legacy here in Action Wrestling, and I’ll tear through any one of you pricks in order to get MY property back.
I am the greatest TV Champion in this federation's history.
Past, present, and future
That belt is the Jolee Championship
They might as well call it the TJ Championship
Or maybe the Tatianavision Championship
Ohhh snap… That’s a good one, I’m gonna keep that in my back pocket
Until then… Kano, Niblet…
I’ll see you two goons on Clash
Get ready to meet GREATNESS
But you’d be wrong.
TOP show on CBS by the way
We draw huge numbers, which attracts sponsors and stimulates PPV buys. And though we do make a ton of money at the gate - it PALES in comparison to what we get from Television. That’s not hyperbole, it’s the truth - you can look it up all you want… And so, the TELEVISION Title is the TOP Title in the federation.
Whatmore, everyone has a quote/unquote “World” Title - Most have a regional championship. But few have a TELEVISION Title - nor the capacity to draw the sort of numbers that we do here in AW, therefore the ACTION WRESTLING TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP is the TOP title to hold in this media powerhouse.
Ah… And that brings me to our television show, Monday Night Clash where your FAVOURITE Canadian hero will go into a battle against that one guy from Mortal Kombat and somebody called… Nibole?
Like, what?
Who calls themselves Nibole?
Were her parents conflicted between Nicole and Nipple for a baby name?
C’mon… Look at her
She’s that girl
Hands down
Sorry (not sorry)
Kano, you at least try to do good by yourself in this business. You’ve got some international clout and a reputation for being hard-nosed. I got a pretty good read on you last week, and if we’re being real right now… This thing is going to come down to me and you, pal. The two biggest, best warriors clashing on the big stage for the RIGHTS to challenge for the TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP!
LMAO just kidding… YOU’RE A JOBBER, BRAH!
J O B B E R
Just like Nublets, you’re a clown… And I don’t mean like Bozo the clown, either - somehow that dude is over (WHY!?) - no, no… I mean like a juggling fool looking to fall on his ass. And because I’m so accommodating, I’m going to help you do just that while making you “TV Famous” for twenty-odd minutes. You should be thanking me; I’m going to actually make you look like you belong in the same ring as myself and generic Barbie (Barbloe?) … But it’s all just for show - at the end of the day, I'm gonna plow my foot so far up your jabroni ass that you’ll have to have my shoelaces untied from your tonsils by your orthodontist.
Savage… That’s savage
But honest
I’m sick and freckin’ TIRED of being in this purposeless loop around here and complaining about that trash isn’t doing me any favors. So, I’m taking matters into my own hands. On Clash, I’m going out there to absolutely absolve Nibole and Kano of any reasonable claim to MY Television Championship - and then, I’m going to slap Addy-A around like a rockem’ sockem’ robot to reclaim the MOST important and influential championship in the HISTORY of professional wrestling.
The TV Title BELONGS around my perfect Canadian waist - it’s a part of MY legacy here in Action Wrestling, and I’ll tear through any one of you pricks in order to get MY property back.
I am the greatest TV Champion in this federation's history.
Past, present, and future
That belt is the Jolee Championship
They might as well call it the TJ Championship
Or maybe the Tatianavision Championship
Ohhh snap… That’s a good one, I’m gonna keep that in my back pocket
Until then… Kano, Niblet…
I’ll see you two goons on Clash
Get ready to meet GREATNESS
#TatianaVisionChampionship
