Post by Azurine Vebbins on Jan 23, 2022 6:08:58 GMT -5
A ravishing redhead ruminates how to rally amplified audience applause for Monday night. Even though she’s wicked worn out from frivolity on Friday night, the recently revealed Miss May of TIA Promotions 2022 Women of E-Wrestling Calendar doesn’t want to display one decimal of deterioration. To further retain resolution, “Da Hardheaded Housewife” gently guffaws before heckling a hit squad of hardasses.
Azurine Vebbins: Bountiful ballyhoo, Beantown! It’s “Da Hardheaded Housewife” Azurine Vebbins wid pragmatically positive promotional material dis week. My troupe of “Da Bad Apple Bottom Gene” Aphriya Adler, “Six Foot Dun-der-bolt” Krystal Halestorm, and “Horrorcore Hotti” Jessie Lee are brilliantly balanced to deflate Bungle’s Blowhards. We each have our own oratory for obliteratin’ opposition. Aphriya chose to cripple our competition wid kindness which works since she’s not gone haloed head to twirlin’ toe against Addy A, Teo Blaze, “Da Shade” Grady Kilbride, or da dame I’m determined on demolishin’: Spayde Foxtrottin’ Martinez.
I might’ve mentioned it’s National Compliment Day when CruiserClash airs, but my sentiments shall be seasoned wid sufficient salt. It’s a natural nutty notion to regard rivals since dey routinely reduce relevance. Again, my quaint quartet features dree dames proficient in powerbombs and plenty plexin’ pursuits. Briefcase in point, Krystal Halestorm struck da sensationally skilled Kitsumi wid dat precise punishment on last week’s show. Jessie Lee, meanwhile, is fully focused on finishin’ foes via fatality-flexible flourish. Dat’s what makes her horrorcore. Chanters could also consider us a hybrid peanut butter sandwich. Halestorm’s da top slice, Lee’s chunky ’cause she provides protein-packed pummelin’s, Aphriya’s creamy since she smoods din’s over, and I’m da power bottom slice which keeps us contained.
Conversely, deyr’s our General Manager’s gaggle of miscreants. Kilbride became Cruiserweight Tag-Team Champion purely based on random timin’. When Aphable Azzumption sets da tempo, dough, he’s not gonna match da rhy-dim of our metronome. Adelaide Ains-word, meanwhile, likens our main event merengue to pourin’ gasoline. Sounds fair given da combustible combination of herself, Teo Blaze, and Spayde Martinez. She wants to win, but deyr’s just not enough compatible chemistry to conquer. Speakin’ of conquer, I’ll commend dat respectable rogue Teo Blaze on havin’ da gnarliest knack of kneein’ my cranium. Difference now is dat I’ll be slippin’ on a Boston Black Mambas football helmet before we flamenco onto da field, fool. Finally, deyr’s Spayde Martinez. She’s a confident choker. However, when my entire ensemble eliminates Grady, Addy, and Teo, Martinez shalt be like a burst balloon. She’ll be da one unable to oblige oxygenation.
“Da Adorkable Angel” smirks, snickers, and then slaps on the aforementioned football helmet. The camera stream fades out with Azurine Vebbins’ trademark smile of saccharine satisfaction.
Azurine Vebbins: Bountiful ballyhoo, Beantown! It’s “Da Hardheaded Housewife” Azurine Vebbins wid pragmatically positive promotional material dis week. My troupe of “Da Bad Apple Bottom Gene” Aphriya Adler, “Six Foot Dun-der-bolt” Krystal Halestorm, and “Horrorcore Hotti” Jessie Lee are brilliantly balanced to deflate Bungle’s Blowhards. We each have our own oratory for obliteratin’ opposition. Aphriya chose to cripple our competition wid kindness which works since she’s not gone haloed head to twirlin’ toe against Addy A, Teo Blaze, “Da Shade” Grady Kilbride, or da dame I’m determined on demolishin’: Spayde Foxtrottin’ Martinez.
I might’ve mentioned it’s National Compliment Day when CruiserClash airs, but my sentiments shall be seasoned wid sufficient salt. It’s a natural nutty notion to regard rivals since dey routinely reduce relevance. Again, my quaint quartet features dree dames proficient in powerbombs and plenty plexin’ pursuits. Briefcase in point, Krystal Halestorm struck da sensationally skilled Kitsumi wid dat precise punishment on last week’s show. Jessie Lee, meanwhile, is fully focused on finishin’ foes via fatality-flexible flourish. Dat’s what makes her horrorcore. Chanters could also consider us a hybrid peanut butter sandwich. Halestorm’s da top slice, Lee’s chunky ’cause she provides protein-packed pummelin’s, Aphriya’s creamy since she smoods din’s over, and I’m da power bottom slice which keeps us contained.
Conversely, deyr’s our General Manager’s gaggle of miscreants. Kilbride became Cruiserweight Tag-Team Champion purely based on random timin’. When Aphable Azzumption sets da tempo, dough, he’s not gonna match da rhy-dim of our metronome. Adelaide Ains-word, meanwhile, likens our main event merengue to pourin’ gasoline. Sounds fair given da combustible combination of herself, Teo Blaze, and Spayde Martinez. She wants to win, but deyr’s just not enough compatible chemistry to conquer. Speakin’ of conquer, I’ll commend dat respectable rogue Teo Blaze on havin’ da gnarliest knack of kneein’ my cranium. Difference now is dat I’ll be slippin’ on a Boston Black Mambas football helmet before we flamenco onto da field, fool. Finally, deyr’s Spayde Martinez. She’s a confident choker. However, when my entire ensemble eliminates Grady, Addy, and Teo, Martinez shalt be like a burst balloon. She’ll be da one unable to oblige oxygenation.
“Da Adorkable Angel” smirks, snickers, and then slaps on the aforementioned football helmet. The camera stream fades out with Azurine Vebbins’ trademark smile of saccharine satisfaction.
