Blew my chance, sorry! Aug 29, 2021 3:25:34 GMT -5 Action Reel, Claire Hawkins, and 1 more like this
Post by Quixote Della Torre on Aug 29, 2021 3:25:34 GMT -5
I'm sorry to say that I won't be able to produce a RP for the Uprising World Title match Not even a rush job.
I must have spent 30+ hours in preparation over the last week (typically in the early hours of the morning), including reading every single Dune RP (including his 2 from UCI... the dude's so good, I was captivated) and most Philidor related RPs. I was planning an all nighter last night but still had to do lots of research to feel ready. The structure and narrative of my RP was all planned out, and was quite elaborate. Probably too elaborate. All this preparation without having started actually writing reflects 1) a lack of confidence currently and 2) a lack of proper reading throughout the year, hence having to cram it in last minute.
I have to go to work now and will be busy until the new deadline so, needless to say, I'll be a no show. As an aside, if it were the usual deadline, I'd make it but I more than understand why it was changed and I think it's a good idea to protect the phenomenal Torture and our amazing admins.
In my personal life, we moved out of our house on Wednesday/Thursday and are staying with my parents while we await the build of our new house to be complete. That purchase was only secured on Friday too, so we've had lots of stress on that front (stupid expired mortgage offers, stupid Covid delays...). Combined with having small children and starting 3 new job roles this Summer, my time for AW has been minimal.
To say I'm disappointed in myself is an understatement. Since I joined in October 2018, this was my first World Title shot. I got close a few times but then sabotaged myself or had to take time away. This does seem a psychological pattern with me, and I was in the same pattern in WCF too with my one shot there which I also blew.
I certainly really appreciate the opportunity at Uprising and am very very sorry to no show. I think, given all this, it's going to be hard for me to continue on here in AW but we'll see. Maybe I'm a Cruiserweight guy and need to stay in my lane. I'll need to think about my future in AW but no showing my biggest opportunity is not a good look and I'm not sure I can stay, especially as QDT.
Thanks all for making this such a great fed. I appreciate you. If this is the end for me here, thank you and all the best. If not, see you soon I guess.