Post by Carter Shaw on Feb 28, 2021 10:41:34 GMT -5
“If you don’t heal what hurt you, you’ll bleed on people who didn’t cut you,” -Kyle Kemp
“...and when do you think the last time was in your life that you felt purpose, Carter?”
“I...I’m not so sure I've ever felt purpose. What is purpose, ya know?”
“Well, our purpose is whatever we decide to define it as. A reason, a motivation, a muse.”
...
“Do you feel that your sponsorship with Philidor Holdings has provided you with a sense of purpose?”
“Yeah, I do.”
“Let’s try that again, and this time don’t answer like a child being asked if he did his homework...Do you, Carter, feel a sense of purpose through Philidor?”
“Yes. I’ve had support from them in my life that I never thought I’d ever have. And in AW? I help them, they help me, simple as that.”
“Good, that’s good. Support is important. When are some other times you’ve felt supported in your life?”
Silence follows, Shaw’s eyes dancing around the room a bit.
“I, uh...I guess I’ve always been the supporter, Doc. I don’t think I’ve ever looked to be supported.”
“We all need support, Carter. It is the key foundation to a strong mental being. You feel supported by Philidor Holdings, that’s good. You also get to support Philidor, which will satiate your natural direction as a strong human being. Each side needs each other, Mr. Shaw. What good is a car with no road?”
“You met me at a very strange time in my life”
This is what Tyler Durden says to Marla at the end of Fight Club; after his reality crashes down all around him and he comes to find who he may really be. I think of this climax when I think of the first time I met Ash Blake. Corey Bull had attacked my personal life, I found out about a half-sister that I wanted to get to know (Bull ruined that too)...I had lost my mother to cancer, I had started to truly succeed in Action Wrestling, while still striving for so much more…
Ash Blake met me at a very strange time in my life. When my reality was crashing down. And when we first spoke, she asked me questions about me. Not about AW, not about my All-In briefcase possibilities. Not about fighting or forming tag teams. For the very first time, a fellow AW competitor asked me about me. It was refreshing and off-putting; simultaneously.
I wonder how Dandy DiVito’s first sitdown with Kyle Kemp went. A year prior, going back to Dandy reigning over AW as World Champion, he would’ve called Kemp out for the megalomaniacal wannabe-overlord that he is. But then things changed for Dandy. After all the highs of his success, he started to lose that edge that set him apart. He started to falter a bit in the ring, he started to lose more matches, and suddenly, for the first time in his spoiled life, he had to face *gasp* adversity.
And Kyle Kemp smelled that shit a mile away.
It’s interesting. Getting to talk with Kyle Kemp a couple times during our Battlebowl journey together, I can certainly vouch for one solid characteristic of his. He’s certainly not a bad guy. But to think of how he came to Dandy from the light, arms extended with that smirk that just cries out God Complex...It’s really not that different then Philidor when it comes to my story, is it? Ash Blake sat me down, offered me a sponsorship, offered me a friendship and did so with a rare decency you don’t find much in this sport.
So why do The Following make Philidor out to be the bad guys? Why does Dandy dislike me so much that all he did was snarl at me while I walked the Following compound? He was like the family dog, untrusting of the mailman. Just a bit territorial there, Dandy? Dandy needed a bit of a direction and Kyle Kemp appeared. I needed a bit of help and Ash Blake appeared.
Not that different, you and I, Dandy. Just on different teams. And you can clamor for the sweet taste of revenge all you want when it comes to the night Wesley got wrecked by our H.R. Department...but don’t act like your team is a collection of kings of the high road. You’d go back in time and flip roles in an instant. Both of us want to make that kind of an impact. Turns out that Philidor is just a little more efficient than you.
The only other difference is that The Following caught you in a net on your descent, Dandy, while Philidor found me on the rise. Kemp got to play nurse to your broken ego while Ash Blake? Saltair? Garvey? They got to add fuel to a fire that was already burnin’. Like I told you several months ago, before beatin’ your ass and getting to add you to the list of “AW OGs bested by Carter Shaw”...You never lost your step, you were just getting caught off guard by the surrounding talent catching up with you.
Like me. I’m that talent. I’m that ‘next generation’ of Action Wrestling that will leave you in the filth of the memories you’ve created. Me. Carter Shaw. I’m one of several passing you by, but hey...as long as you’ve got The Following and I’ve got Philidor? Maybe we stick around on the same level for a little bit longer and duke it out a few more times. It won’t hurt my stock. Because I’ll just get to finally put you down like the Following family dog that you are.
And Kemp? Well, as I’ve gotten to do more research on you boys since we’ve been working together and all, I see right through the “Dandy’s saviour” schtick. Kemp, with his selfless offerings and Self-Help 101 teachings, needed Dandy just as much as Dandy may have needed him.
And now I know why.
It wasn’t for his talent. It wasn’t for another ace up his sleeve.
Dandy’s fuckin’ loaded. And in order for Kyle Kemp to continue to evolve the empire he dreams of? He needs money.
Hey, I offered a very mutually-beneficial deal that would help alleviate what will soon be the weight of debt’s reality crashing down. I tried to help you guys, I really did. Don’t mistake Kemp’s stupidity for pride. And Dandy, know that Papa Kemp will say ‘no’ to your financial offerings a couple more times before finally accepting that green backbone.
Because a true con man always makes sure that it feels like your idea.
As far as CJ Phoenix goes, that man is training like every AW Clash is the goddamn olympics, and I respect that effort and drive. I respect it very much, and this BattleBowl finale? A great opportunity for Project Greenlight himself. Cause right now? He’s stuck being just a ‘number’ in order to +1 Kemp’s private detail. Kemp could’ve gone at those Tag Titles with Phoenix by his side in true protege style, but nah. He knew Dandy would get the job done.
Do you know how many chances Kyle Kemp has had at a fuckin’ match like this? Kyle Kemp’s been failing in BattleBowl battle royals since the beginning of AW time. The man succeeds with his boys by his side, but when it comes down to Kyle Kemp Vs The World? He finally realizes just how small he is. Sure, this time he’s got the whole gang (atleast, the gang left standing) in the match with him, but they ain’t gonna be looking to be Kemp’s enforcers and then toss themselves out of the ring in ritual sacrifice.
You know CJ Phoenix wants this as a chance to show he can hang at the next level.
You know Dandy needs this for the pride he’s still trying to piece back together for himself.
And Kyle Kemp will be on the outs. Again. Because the only time Kemp truly stands on his own two feet is when it’s on someone else’s shoulders. This Sunday at Battlefield, i’m gonna line up all 3 members of The Following like the fuckin’ 3 little pigs and wreck their shit one by one.
I’ll blow down CJ Phoenix’s house of straw when I catch him with a quick dodge and send him toppling over the top rope, cause he just ain’t ready yet for this gale-force type of wind.
I’ll blow down Dandy DiVito’s house of sticks when I haul that carcass over and out, because it will never stop being entertaining to see just how easy Dandy breaks these days.
And I’ll bulldoze through Kyle Kemp’s house of bricks when we stand face to face, exchange a few words and then realize we ain’t gotta pretend to be friendly anymore. Kemp’s bricks are more fragile than he thinks. He wouldn’t know. He didn’t build it. He sat back in that nice La-Z-Boy recliner and watched his followers build for him.
This story ends realistically. Philidor stands tall. The Big Bad Wolf gets the job done.
And in the end? Y’all Following pigs can just retreat back to the compound and blow each other.
“This is your life and it’s ending one moment at a time.”
“And how did that make you feel, Carter?”
“...powerless.”
“That’s a powerful thing to feel.”
“I had no way to protect my property, my family. All because of Corey’s lack of morality. I’d never come across anything like that before, and i’ve seen it happen, still happening, all over AW. I mean, look at Nightingale and FPV.”
“I understand why you’re going there, but we’re not talking about any of them. We’re talking about you.”
Shaw moves uncomfortably with an adjustment of the neck. He leans back in the chair with a sigh, letting his eyes float to the ceiling above.
“Let’s go back to what you said before. Let’s look at what Kyle Kemp said to you, let’s identify why it’s resonating with you so much. If you don’t heal what hurt you...identify something that hurt you.”
“I...losing my mother. Losing my mother hurt me.”
“Good, Carter, good! That’s a true identifier, nothing resonates more than the loss of a loved one. You’ll bleed on those that didn’t cut you...does this identify with something in your life? People you have wronged or…”
“Yeah. My brother, for one. Chris. I’ve pushed him out of my life and any attempt at truly caring for him as my brother feels exhausting. The AW fans? They weren’t too happy with my Philidor decision.”
“There’s millions of fans for both you and AW, Carter. Don’t worry about their reaction, they will look to steer you in very selfish direction.”
Shaw nods slowly, fighting hard to maintain an open mind; trying hard to break through the natural reaction to shut down and shut Dr. Brower out.
“...Philidor. I may bleed on Philidor?”
“Are you asking me?”
“I...I don’t know.”
“We talked about the importance of a support system in life, and that’s exactly what your mother was. That’s a big loss, Carter, I don’t need to tell you that. But it’s more than just a face you still wish to see. It’s a life adjustment. It’s a change in behaviour, a change in purpose. Not a loss of purpose, a change. I think you’ve done well shifting that purpose with Philidor, Carter, I think they’re good for you. And you are certainly good for them.”
“Appreciate it, Doc”
“Come see me next week, in person or on Zoom, whatever you want Mr. Shaw. I am here for you. I am here to support you.”
Shaw gets up from the chair and nods with a slight smirk, his eyes a bit lost as this type of discussion was never in his element. Dr. Brower stands from his desk and extends a hand, Shaw grasping it quickly before leaving the room. The Doc sits back down in his chair and swivels it around to face the window, as he opens the blinds and looks outward with a satisfied grin.
The name plate, sturdy with pride, at the front of his desk read:
Dr. Jared Brower
Psychologist
Around the back of it, etched into the bronze, was:
Philidor Holdings, L.L.C.
I’d like to thank Corey Bull and Sam Kidsgrove for the little momentum boost going into this battle royal. And with that said, I guess I should address the snake in the room.
Some may not have liked my methods, I didn’t know winning could be questioned so much. I am a man looking for results; to solidify my status as your inevitable future AW World Champion. To remind the world that Philidor is ruling the wrestling world through its sponsorees, let alone Ash Blake herself besting Corey Black and holding that World Championship.
Kyle Kemp and myself rolled back into the ring in time to get a countout victory.
I caught Frank Lowe with the ROLLUP OF DEATH for us to continue to advance.
And here I am. In the Battlebowl finals. Thanks to results.
So me throwing Kidsgrove over the top rope in a foreshadow and getting the 1,2,3 on Corey Bull after the Box Office Smash? Some thought it felt cheap. You go ahead and think that. I’d call it a message. A perfect message, a deeper foreshadow then the surface even shows.
It’s a good reminder that when multiple bodies are flying around that ring? When there’s fists coming from each direction, when there’s more than 2 intentions-for-victory in one match...anything goes to grab that victory. How I won wasn’t cheap, it was efficient. Picking up the scraps handed to me by my opposition. Seizing the opportunity in the moment it presented itself.
That’s how I won. That’s how I will win the battle royal this Sunday to cap off the OG Bishop Battlebowl Memorial...and hell, that’s how I’ll keep carrying that momentum to a Havoc Rumble win when it’s all said and done.
And was I scared of Corey Bull? No. I’m not physically scared of Corey Bull. But my nose would grow if I said I wasn’t still a bit weary of him. Bull got to feel powerful for all of a month toying with my life. But just like at Execution last year, when he finally had to come face to face with me...and just like this past week at Clash...I will best Bull. 10 times out of 10. This one was with a little more strategy peppered in.
He wants so badly to hit that next threat level. He wants so damn badly to be able to execute his diabolical plans and dreams fully. And maybe one day, hell breaks through and he does indeed do that.
But it ain’t gonna happen while he’s stuck on the wrong end of Frank Lowe’s leash. Lowe ain’t gettin’ that 30 spot through Bull, because Bull will NEVER...achieve that success when it has to go...through...me…
And Kidsgrove? The king of making noise that never quite qualifies as hype? Well, just like Kyle Kemp, he’ll continue the pattern of letting himself down in these types of situations. 2021 ain’t gonna be different for those of you that have been stuck under the glass ceiling since 2018. Just like for Dandy Divito?
Things just get worse as those around you keep getting better.
Howard Black and Spencer Adams are a completely different story. They ARE that glass ceiling. Spencer, the man of 1,000 title shots, and Howard Black, your 2020 WRESTLER OF THE YEAR.
They are the bar. A couple of measuring sticks. It was natural that they got to this point side-by-side, unwillingly, and it didn’t bust any brackets to see them be in this 8-man battle royal to finish it all off.
But.
That’s why this opportunity is mine. Because while Howard Black tramples a few more bodies under the feet of his metaphorical horse as he rides off to that planned sunset, I need to be one of the last ones to get one over on him. I’ll do so by nabbing that 30th entry spot, crushing his perfect plan of checking the Havoc Rumble off of his career bucket list. And Spencer Adams?
Well he’s been here before, hasn’t he? Just never with me in his path. You know I have the utmost respect for you, Spence, but that will slow me down less than ever come Sunday. You both have the experience for sure. You two, Kemp, Dandy, Kidsgrove, Bull...you’ve learned from a handful of trials and tribulations over the years in this match environment. And where I come from, there’s a cage surrounding you that stops you from taking the tumble that ends dreams in this situation.
But I’m no longer the guy that comes from cage fighting.
No.
AW is in ShAW for a reason.
Because I’m an AW guy now, like it or not. And while I won’t be taking the coined phrase of Action Original…
When I survive, once again, this time as Battlebowl’s last man standing? Over the likes of Howard Black and Spencer Adams...Of Dandy, Kemp and Phoenix...Of Bull and Kidsgrove...
Just like standing over the likes of Wesley and Crow McMorris when I became Mr. All-In…
I’ll coin the phrase Action Original Killer.