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Post by Action Reel on Feb 23, 2021 1:28:30 GMT -5
Johnny Bacchus vs. Mr. Abraham vs. Nate
Rules: You get six posts containing 200 words or less.
You ONLY get to use TWO images.
No posting back to back ever.
Good luck.
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Post by Johnny Bacchus on Feb 23, 2021 2:12:12 GMT -5
uh oh…
…u friccin morons…
….u just activated CHIMP MODE. And here I was thinking they’d try to give me a challenge after I ran a train on this division like BART. Well you carry around a child’s toy belt, they give you the child’s play. But doesn’t matter if you’re bullying two guys who wouldn’t have the brain cells to rub together to start a survival fire in Austin – always go in. And like Rich Homie Quan once said, I Promise I Will Never Stop Going In.
NATE my dude, Mr. Abrahams, congrats on getting shine after doing absolutely nothing. I mean. I respect people who commit welfare fraud: takes cunning, commitment, and courage. I think both you are cool for this fleecing..
But? Yung Toon Summoned Skull finna rain on you like the Pee Tape. (It’s real), I wish you were honest, Abe. Then you wouldn’t waste my time in this match with a winless record and would send Bishop instead. I wish you weren’t funnier than me, NATE. But I’m gonna beat the dogshit outcha because being funny doesn’t make you an AW Champ.
Not unless you’re JBac. #KingsDead I made this division sing last week.
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NATE
Professional Wrestler
Posts: 182
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Post by NATE on Feb 24, 2021 6:14:24 GMT -5
High Jon E Bak Us Wot R U Tolkin Abawt Eye Hav Atcheevd Lotz Inn Akshun Resslin Eye Beet Da Bigg Fatt E Bamm Biefa An Olso Ostraylier Loowez Datz Kwite A Illustreeus Kareer Eye Amm Shaw U Wil Agrie Wen Yoo Fink Abawk Itt Itz O Kay Dat U Didnt No Tho B Coz May B U Hav Nott Herd Ov Mi B Coz Eye Hav Noe Eye Deer Hu U R Eeva Matty Ass Showd Mi A Pick Cher Ov U Eye Fink Yor Redd Hare Iz Sill E U Luk Lyk Ronn Ald Mac Donn Ald An Un 4 Chewnatly 4 U Eye Lyk Eetin Hambergers Dat Linkz Eezily 2 Miss Der Ay Bra Hamberger U R Ver E Owld Eye Onli Sau Wun Pickcher Ov U Az Wel Sow Sori Iff U R Nott Owld May B Da Lite Woz Badd U R Lyk Owld Mac Donn Ald An Jon E Iz Lyk Ronn Ald Mac Donn Ald Eye Wil Sae Sum Maw Meen Fings Abawt U Bowf L8r Butt Naw Eye Hav 2 Goe B Coz Eye Am Ver E Hungree Eye Wil Goe 2 Burga Kingz 4 A Woppa Tho 2 Mayk U Angree
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Post by Johnny Bacchus on Feb 24, 2021 13:17:29 GMT -5
god finally one of you says something ffs. What did I say? You’re funny NATE. Funny like a clown, like ha-ha you amuse me. Unfortunately, I don’t have that juggalo drip yet – I’m not opposed to it, though, so Twiztid Insane if you’re reading this: book me on the show.
I do understand the confusion, considering the twisted chaos I’ve wrought on the Pure Title. It was not lost on me either:
Da Freakin’ Joker Bay-Bee. Clown Prince of AW and Soviet GAWD of Toon World. In smaller words, I’m gonna take a big mallet and bop you on the head Tom & Jerry-style. You’re a big guy – you’ll probably just see a bunch of birdies flying around or fold up like an accordion.
Please don’t eat at Burger King, NATE. I don’t have any stake in the matter, but Burger King is depressing – I have never seen anyone smiling in a Burger King. You deserve at least Carl’s Jr. I’ll pay for it with my Champion bonus. It’s mascot is a happy star.
You ain’t gonna be happy when I beat that ass. I ain’t gonna be happy either.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Tears of a clown.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Feb 24, 2021 19:18:02 GMT -5
I have no idea what either you are trying to say about each other... as for you, Johnathan, it was by the extracurriculars of the Corinthians to abase themselves with the quaking of soul, wit and smattering of spoken word. So called "tongues" as expression for the moment at which epiphany reached euphoria.
That said, one's willingness to subvert language and speak - fast forward or not - on another's mission takes more than gusto, my friend. I takes literal courage. Sadly, and I do say so sincerely, the good fans of action wrestling are not bought by the dismantling of Zombie McMorris. They worship those whose struggle is their own. Something, you sir, are sidestepping because you believe rules do not apply.
Well they do. Soon, I'll get a chance to right the ship and it begins by snapping your chicken neck.
NATE - a phonetic nightmare, but all-around good person - I hope you're doing well today. You didn't come here to hurt anyone. No, you see, this man wants think you're simple. That you are duller than a ploughman's scythe at dusk. I beg you humbly to hear my reason and stop listening to his attempts to torment you. Let me deal with this yapping yuppie. You focus on becoming the better you, and when you're ready, we can discuss something amazing.
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Post by Johnny Bacchus on Feb 24, 2021 23:59:24 GMT -5
el em aye oh
Fucking spare me, Abe. Shit, spare NATE more than me. The moment you prattled off your Sunday morning radio shtick, the average IQ of the match dropped a tens digit. I say that with a straight face.
NATE is endearing. I like NATE. I talk playful shit to NATE because I like him. You? You say whatever you want – patronize and condescend all of us, and act like I’m commuting some egregious insult to our opponent telling him I’m gonna beat his ass and buy him a Famous Star – I’m not gonna talk playful shit to you. I’m gonna spell this out as clear as I can.
We are not the same. And it’s not because you’re righteous and I’m a little shit; it’s because I would never be anything but me. I don’t even wanna fight a pompous loser I’ve fucked up before – you go get Kevin Bishop to come out of retirement.
Here’s some honesty, Abe: I’m looking forward to this more than last time. I’m gonna send you back to whatever forest cult compound you came from in an ambulance. Give the Plague a kiss for me.
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NATE
Professional Wrestler
Posts: 182
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Post by NATE on Feb 25, 2021 7:24:01 GMT -5
O No
Eye Am Sori Miss Der Ay Bra Hamberger Eye Dowt No Wot N E Ov Dat Meens
Eye Herd U Say Chikin An Den Eye Woz Lossd
Eye Fink U R In Da Rong Job U Shood B A Politishun Eye Neva No Wot Der Sayin Eever
Senitor Hamberger Loll
Wen Eye Woz Bay Bee NATE Inn Tode Suk Der Woz Dis Sheap Hu Kepd Tolkin 2 Mi An sayin Meearehehrehehrhehehrhhrrrrr An Eye Dident No Wot It Ment U Remynd Mi Ov Dat Sheap
Sadlee 4 U Eye Amm Da Peek Ov Sportin Perfekshun Sow U Woant B Taykin Da Pyoor Champeeunship Bak 2 Ur Sheapy Parlehment Bildin
Jon E Fanks Sow Mutch 4 Ur Advyse Eye Luvd Mi Berger Att Cahl Jooniers Eye Toald Dem U Wil Pae Lyk U Offerd
Eye Downt No Wot Obnockshus Meenz Butt Eye Fink U R Misunderstood
U R Jus A Lyttl Boi Hu Lykes Hambergers
But Dat Meenz Eye Wil Win Da Pyoor Tytle B Coz Eye Amm A Bigg Boi Hu Lykes Hambergers An U Woant B Abel 2 Stopp Mi
Olso Pleez Downt Tolk Abawt Wot U Wana Du 2 Mi Asse In Publik Eva Agen U Purvert
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Feb 25, 2021 13:12:05 GMT -5
Ham... burger... I suppose the venue is all its own.
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NATE
Professional Wrestler
Posts: 182
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Post by NATE on Feb 26, 2021 7:00:24 GMT -5
Wot
Onistly Eye Hav Noe Eyedear Wot Ur Onn Abowt Ay Bra Hamberger Peeple Sae Eyem Dum Butt Eyev Askd Jeevz An Hi Kant Tel Mi Iver
Matty Ass Saze U Mite B See Nial
Eye Towld Hym Da Nial Iz In Eejipt Butt Hi Sed U R Itt N E Way
Iff U R Tryin 2 Du A Joak Abawt Bergers Den Stopp Itt Sum Fings R Moar Impawtent Dan Resslin An Eye Fink Yoo R Taykin Fings 2 Fah Eye Noe Wi R Suppowzed 2 B Ryvels But Stil Der Iz a Lyne
Iff Ur Tolkin Abawt Sumfin Els Dats O Kay
Eyem A Bitt Wurryed Dat Eye Mite B Da Moast Normle 1 Inn Dis Mach
U Keap Sayin Fings Day Mayk No Sens An Jon En Kieps Tolkin Abawt Mallits, Chim Panzies An My Asse
Yooshully Eye Stik Owt B Cos Eye Am Sow Eksepshunal Butt Peeple Wil B Ekspectin Mi 2 B Da Sensyble 1 Att Battlfeeled Wiv U 2
Sow Eye Wil Tayk Da Hi Grawnd An Say Dis
Eye Wil Jumpp On Bowf Ov Ur Heds At Battlfeeled Dats Da Nyoo Moov Eyem Praktisin An Itz Perfikt 4 Winnin Da Pyoor Tytl
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Post by Johnny Bacchus on Feb 26, 2021 11:20:12 GMT -5
NATE, my dude, it is 2021. Calling someone wanting to do someone’s ass a pervert? Not gonna lie pretty yikes 😬. Jimmy Nights don’t seem the type to dole out sensitivity training shy of Philidor’s brand, so I’m here to help. But you gotta do better, NATE. Don’t let NATE rhyme with hate.
That said, I may have let my San Francisco Bay Area freak flag fly a little too much – I could’ve been a little more subtle. I’m sorry. I don’t wanna do anything to your ass, NATE; I’m pretty sure I’m taken.
Take by the Pure Title. Married to the Game. (This gonna get me in trouble later.) Only thing I’m interested in doing to you is giving the ol’ one-two one-two #KingsDead ding-ding-ding (and I’m not talking about the Hostess). I’ll buy you another Famous Star afterwards – you went to the Carl’s Jr. on Telegraph Ave, right? It’s the only one I’m not banned from. Can’t help you otherwise.
You’re probably the most normal guy in the match, yeah, especially since we got Abe drooling on himself already. But I’m not misunderstood – there’s no misunderstanding me winning the Pure Title.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 26, 2021 14:24:18 GMT -5
Psalm 118 - 121
I won't recite for those whose attention spans, well, they span less than a book's width. I am here to teach the same as a stain glass window: May our intricacies beset our idiosyncrasies, then alas we are bound to what makes us... us.
I assume Johnny will continue to tell NATE what is right by popular culture, which by association is boiled and bland like Buffalo Wild Wing's chicken. As one man from - or more less, an expat of Upstate New York - should express, truly, I am not a fan of what culture does to already perfect things. You Johnny will continue to tell people that creating your own rules is a foundation of success. One day... and it might not be me... but you will have a meal composed of your own teeth. Searching then, you won't find a mouthpiece. Only the small bit of career defined by a bite of burnt steak with ketchup.
NATE: Please continue to do what you do. Destroy this man because he thinks you're unworthy. Unfit for the ring. Stop listening and crush him! The Savior loves what you do. Don't. Stop. Being You!
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Post by Johnny Bacchus on Feb 27, 2021 11:29:15 GMT -5
You leave B-Dubz out of this. We wanna talk bland? You’ve been slatherin’ mayo on your wings like a sauce and dippin’ them in Ranch – least that’s what that gut suggests, fat boy.
If I moved down South, they’d call me the Carolina Reaper. I kiss the girls and make them cry. I also deliver dropkick to the teeth of annoying blowhards – you wouldn’t know that cause I don’t King’s Dead peasants. You just gonna get hucked out the ring like a sack of potatoes, same as last time.
Here I expected divine retribution from you, Abe – this is the shit we get? Impotent Bible thumping and cowering behind NATE? Talking sweet on my references? Sorry my reference pool is greater than one book – my wrestling pool is also greater than one move. I’m only sad to say you’re both probably a little too hefty to bust out the Northern Lights with the bridge pin Trey was helping me with. We’ll just have to suffice for the Guillotine.
NATE, this dude wants you to eat teeth. That’s weird. If you beat him up, I’ll take you and Matthias to B-Dubz. No Jimmy Nights tho. He’s sus.
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NATE
Professional Wrestler
Posts: 182
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Post by NATE on Feb 27, 2021 12:23:52 GMT -5
Downt Wurry Ay Bra Hamberger Eye Wil Neva Stopp Beein Mi B Cos Eye Am Mi Sow Dats Reeli Eezi Ha Ha
Eye Fink Eye Amm Gowing 2 Hav 2 Tayk Matterz In 2 Mi Oan Hanz Hear B Cos U 2 R Beein Ver E Un Prowfeshenul Tolkin Abawt Chikin Wingz Eye Wud Neva Gett Distraktid Bi Tolkin Abawt Fassd Foowd
Wi Havnt Reeli Tolkd Mutch Abawt Owr Mach Hav Wi
Mattyass Sez Eye Nied 2 Shoowt Moar Sow Hear Goaz Mi Gunn Goaz Pyowwwww O Kay
Ay Bra Hamberger U R Stupid Pyowwwww
Jon E Bakkus Ur Nott Kool Pyowwwww
Ay Bra Hamberger U R Sow Owld U R Neerli Ded Pyowwwww
Jon E Ur Hare Lookz Lyk A Tomahtow Pyowwwww
Vaykant U R Nott A Tru Champeeun Pyowwwww
Eye Fink Zom Bee Mak Morrys Wil B Sow Eksited Wen Hi Seez Dis Mach An Wot Hiz Tytl Haz B Cum Naw Eye Amm Shaw Hi WIl Feal Lyk Eye Am Da Natcherul Suksessor 2 Hiz Frone Wi Are Kwite Alyk In Men E Waze Wi R Bowf Ver E Kool An Danejerus An Angree Oll Da Tym But Eye Am Hyooman Not Zom Bee
Grrrrrr Branez Loll
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 27, 2021 14:59:56 GMT -5
The intensity and verbosity this week is not without an edifying experience in understand the youth. I will never say our young are wrong, even when they prove me right in their enthrallment to the flaws of pop culture. I almost certainly will attack you, Johnathan ... and while I have you ear, let's also abandon this leap from actual chicken to - Also, sorry that I must actually groan in word processor - but this new age of "Chicken Tendies" because I'm also aware that chicken tenders has become to posh for kids to say without recognizing their submission from adulthood.
NATE. He is not taking you to "B-Dubs" nor is he buying you an appetizer.
Johnathan's going to use you like everything else in life. He believes everything revolves around downloaded games off XBox Live - which puts Americans out of work - for convenience. Feels that Juul will not catch up to him because it's cool (he'll also misspell for effect). We are not impressed. Nobody will be either when you taste comeuppance. A day I shall enjoy with a cold glass of peach tea.
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NATE
Professional Wrestler
Posts: 182
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Post by NATE on Feb 27, 2021 18:43:14 GMT -5
Miss Der Ay Bra Hamberger Eye Wood Lyk 2 Hellp U
Eye Kan Teech U Haw 2 Speek Propalee B Coz Eye Fink U Havent Gott Da Hang Ov Itt An Eye Amm Ver E Artikulut
Tri Afta Mee
Da Rane Inn Spane Folls Manely On Da Plain
Du U Atchully Du Resslin Cos U Neva Tolk Abawt It
Matty Ass Sed U Lossd Ol Yor Maches Hear May B U Shud Stopp Sayin Sill E Wurdz An Practis Moar Eye Cud Trane U May B Eye Am Eksellent
Iff Not U Cud B A Common Tayter Coz Dey Hav 2 Sae Lotz Ov Fings Mi Favrit Iz Bil E B Coz Hi Olwaze Sez Shitfyre An Eye Luv Dat Sawt Ov Fing
Ud Hav 2 Practiss At Da Mowment U Sae Mutch 2 Men E Wurdz
Eye Downt No Y U R Heer Iff U Doant Lyk Resslin An R Badd Att Itt At Leest Jon E Iz Reeli Enfyooseastik Y Downt U Jus B A Tolky Man On Tee Vee Lyk Jer E Spinga Ore Owprer Winfree
Itz Yor Life Tho Hamberger Sow Downt Lissen 2 Mi Butt Eye Kant Lett U Beet Me 4 Da Pyoor Tityl
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Feb 28, 2021 15:25:55 GMT -5
Allow me then this benediction:
Hugh Blair spoke in these immortal words, telling us that "levity is frequently a stranger to cheerfulness", in that our happiness will be bested most often by the course of action we take. Mine will be swift and undaunted by my peers this week.
They move to confound us with trivial matters. Johnathan is my peer regardless of what I suppose of him on both a spiritual or conceptual level. I also acknowledge that he, unlike myself has found a recipe for success. One I cannot emulate unless I be undone in my mission. Nathaniel, likewise, has followed his own gospel to the ring. His group pins messages to his lapel... a tragedy most unworthy of this otherwise beautiful human. I see it is my place then to educate my foes so they may better themselves. Alas, there must be percussive maintenance in doing so. So let tonight defines us forever, gentlemen.
Action Wrestling's faithful: I love you and will never stop fighting for your dreams.
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NATE
Professional Wrestler
Posts: 182
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Post by NATE on Feb 28, 2021 17:48:02 GMT -5
Wot A Pleshur Dis Wiek Haz Bin Gettin 2 No U 2 Gies Iff Wi Wernt Gonna Hav A Bigg Fite Soun Eyed Eeven Fink Ov U Bowf Az Frenz
Not Reeli U Sow Mutch Miss Der Ay Bra Hamberger Eyed Fink Ov U Moar Lyk A Unkel Hu Olwaze Cums 2 Familee Partees An Drinkz 2 Mutch Wyne An Vodker An Startz Showtin Randum Wurdz Un Till Da Polees Hav 2 Kum An Tayk Hym Awae 4 Hiz Owen Gud
An Eye Supowz Nott U Eever Jon E Bakk Us U R Moar Lyk A Weerd Cuzzen Hu Diez Hiz Hare Redd An Keepz Sayin Weerd Kooki Fings 2 Mayk Hiz Pare Ents Angree Wiv Hym An Hi Finks Ol Da Peepl Att Skool Lyke Hym Butt Reeli Dey Fink Day Heez Weerd An Mite 1 Dae Attak Dem Wiv A Pensil
Sow Wee R Nott Reeli Frenz Afta Oll I Supows Butt Dats O Kay B Coz Itt Wil B Eeven Eezier Wen Eye Jus Hav 2 Beet U Bowf Upp 2 Wyn Da Pyoor Champeeunchip
Da Dayt Ov NATE Iz Neerli Hear C U Bowf 4 Yor Kornayshuns Az Loozers Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
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Post by Johnny Bacchus on Feb 28, 2021 19:28:23 GMT -5
Big day, gents 😬. And I’m not talking about the subpar Chance the Rapper album. Don’t worry, I wanted to make this a fair match for you two so I got good and drunk last night. Gonna pretty embarrassing when you get your face caved in by a dude wearing sunglasses in the ring lmfao.
Bottle ✅ Popped Conclusion ✅ Forgone Means of Production ✅ Seized It’s been fun and cute – maybe the real Pure Title was the friends we made along the way. But before we’re out there? Let’s go mask off.
There is nobody in this bitch with the momentum I have. NATE, my guy, I don’t know your fate – it ain’t here, though. Abe, you wouldn’t know momentum if it scooped them fat tits. If I lose, the narrative would be about how I choked rather than you won. You were behind the 8 Ball from the second that card dropped.
Don’t worry, I won’t spoil your moment – just deny it to you. I’ve had this division by the balls since I was floated for it. This Toon World – y’all just livin’ in it.
Not for long. 😘 See ya in the ring.
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