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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:38:08 GMT -5
Half Eaten Baked Ham on a Pole Match Capt Pelican vs Alexander Kanuck
Security rushes to the upper sections of the arena where a fight broke out between NBW faithful and those supporting the Insurgency. Dozens scatter with cops bearing down upon them while "We the People" plays over the chaos. Two members of this OG fan base - hefty, neck-bearded boys at that - rise bloodied while those dedicated to UCI's memory run away victorious. One hoists a plastic NBW title replica, presumably stolen as a winner's spoils. Rowdy patron mushroom to this fight area - completely ignoring the bum fight about to begin. No referees stalk the ring where Captain Pelican and Alexander Kanuck wait to brawl. A silvery pole, about twenty feet above the ring, extends above the top. Ham chunks swing from its base with visible bite marks all over its cured skin. Commish: Here we go, Sara. I was waiting all week for this. Sara Conway: Why's that? Commish: Because that Pelican is going to get what's coming to him. Sara Conway: Have something in store then? Commish: Maybe... hit that bell! Time to get this baby going. Kanuck flashes his hockey stick at the bell. Pelican ducks as runs for the ropes. He collides with Alexander's uncovered elbow, spurting blood from his lip. Pelican backs up and tries again; once more, and elbow catches him dumb and blind. Kanuck follows with a heavy boot, dropping Pelican to rising boos. Fan divert from it all - where it seems yet another scuffle has broken out along the entranceways. Secruity riles their growing audience, as the aggressor in Alexander goes straight for the pole. Sara Conway: Just so we're straight, Commissioner. These men not only earn the W, but also a free dinner? Commish: That's the kind of man I am. A generous soul when I need to be one. Sara Conway: Have you settle debts with Captain Pelican? Commish: Look - Kanuck is just wailing on him now. Man that Hockey boy is crazy! Sara Conway: Where did you get the ham? Commish: From our friends at Arby's. #WeGotTheMeats - Kanuck is going up. It's going to be quite the climb. Sara Conway: Why did you make it so high? Pelican may be too short to... oh... Commish: He'll be fine. If he can get off the canvas, Sara. Fans return to the match now that several have been escorted out of the gardens in handcuffs. Alexander drops his stick in favor of reaching the dangling ham. It takes a full extension but he manages to grabs its wire-trapped bone and meat. Sara Conway: I think this one was over before the bell - wait, Pelican is up! Commish: No! How on earth-- Sara Conway: Pelican just rammed the hockey stick between Kanuck's legs. That's, god that's awful. Commish: And downs goes the flannel fight boy. Sometimes, Sara, you have to do your own shit in this country. Sara Conway: Wait - what? Captain Pelican swings with his full weight pulling down the ham piece. The Commissioner leaves his seat and headset behind, entering the apron from Pelican's blindside. He swings but misses the pendulating madman. On a second swing around the pole, Pelican delivers a front dropkick to his boss and rival. Old Jo Lamarche falls to the floor. Sara Conway: It seems my partner has been incapacitated... but the ham will not come down! The Canadian back to his feet, feeling like his parts are futher apart than Newfoundland and Vancouver. He's going back for that stick! Captain Pelican looks down and sees the coming danger. In a desperate move, he pulls his entire weight again for a diving crossbody. This daring move not only sqaushes Alexander Kanuck, but it also pulls the entire pull - and indeed that ham too - down with his blubbery body. Fans begin a three count just the hell of it as "Pelicans We" blasts overhead. Sara Conway: Captain Pelican gets the ham, and I guess, a dinner too. What a match. Stay tuned folks-- Commish: Quiet... I want everyone at home to know. This man is finished. And I will be the one to do it. Sara Conway: Wow, strong words from the Commissioner of our bum fights. Will there be redemption? Will the disgraced and abused Captain Pelican regain that one dollar drop in pay? Join us next week for more bum fights. Now, we move on to tonight's main program. Stay right where you are because Monday Bloody Monday is coming your way, and it's all after these messages.
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:38:51 GMT -5
Ac/Dc’s “A Whole Lotta Rosie” plays and the crowd boos as Lucy The Fat Hooker waddles out from.the back wearing a tight fitting purple pleather dress with silver heels and she heads to the ring flaunting her stuff to the fans. Abbi Stein: Ladies and gentlemen introducing first, coming to the ring and threatening to disrupt the tectonic plates with every fall of her feet, is Lucy the Fat Hooker. She gets into the ring and mouths off at Remi. Charlie Hanson: Looks like she's got her eyes on Ol Remi… St. Remi: Oh god, I think I'm gonna be sick… Kick in the Teeth cranks up and the crowd cheers as Lisa emerges and riles them up into a deeper frenzy with a high tempo romp to the ring. She tags hands and hugs fans along the way, before making a lap around the ring and ending it at the ring steps. She back up to the barricade, flexes one of her impressive biceps and allows a lucky fan to kiss it, before she bolts up the stairs and enters the squared circle. Abbi Stein: And introducing her opponent, making her pro wrestling debut fresh from the MMA world, this is Lisa Fister… I mean Foster. Yeah. St. Remi: She does seem to be a fister kinda lady. Charlie: I see where his mind’s at. Sarah: Typical Remi. The bell rings and Lucy mocks Lisa by doing silly muscle poses, clearly making fun of Lisa’s muscular yet feminine physique, before finally daring her into a test of strength. Lisa checks with the fans first, to see if they would like to she her do it. They do, so she obliges. It’s all a ruse though. As soon as their fingers lock, Lucy fires a knee deep into her gut and begins clubbing the hell out of her with giant forearm smashes across her back. Lisa drops to the mat and is quickly greeted with punts to the ribs and stomps all up and down her back. Charlie Hanson: Welcome to pro wrestling, Lisa. Sara Conway: Ah, she can take it. You don’t succeed in the MMA world by being a wimp. Lucy yanks her up and lifts her overhead in a Gorilla Press position but Lisa wiggles free, slides down her back, and in a display of eye popping power she German Suplexes the obese woman twice her size. The ring rattles from the impact. The collision registers on the richter scale. The people in attendance let out a collective cheer. Lisa crouches in wait, and as Lucy gets back to her feet on wobbly, saggy legs, Lisa bolts forward and drives her pedals deep into her chest, driving her back into the turnbuckle. Not missing a beat, Lisa runs the expanse of the ring to the other corner, then speeds back toward her and delivers a brutal Flying Yakuza Kick that sends Lucy stumbling out of the corner but somehow remaining upright. Lisa whips the fans into a frenzy with some hand and arm gestures before summoning up all her strength and lifting the heavy woman up and over her head into a brief Military Press position before slamming her to the mat. Somehow the ring remains in tact, but the roof doesn’t, because the fans roar so loud it might as well come right off. Charlie Hanson: POP GOES THE WEASEL! St. Remi: HOLY SHIT ON A STICK! Sara Conway: She just lifted her over her head! UNBELIEVABLE!!!! Lucy panics on the mat and rolls toward the ropes. She tries to exit via the bottom one but she is too fat, so she scrambles to her vertical base and hurls herself over the top rope to the outside to escape and catch a breath. While Lisa pumps up the fans from inside the ring, Lucy ambles around on the outside, stealing food and drink from the fans and wolfing it down. Out of nowhere, a very thin man waves a thick roll of cash at Lucy the Fat Hooker and literally propositions her on the spot. She looks at him, then back to the ring, then back to him again. Lucy: “FUCK IT! THEY DON’T PAY ME ENOUGH TO GET MY ASS KICKED ANYWAY.” And with that, Lucy waddles over the guardrail, yanks up the scrawny man and heads toward the exit doors. Charlie Hanson: Did he? Did she? What the??? Sara Conway: They did! Lucy’s gonna get paaaaaaid! Lisa frowns as the referee rattles off the ten count. DING! DING! DING! Abbi Stein: Ladies and Gentlemen, the winner of the match via countout….. LISA! FISTER-HER! I mean… FOSTER! Foster
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:39:12 GMT -5
Because we out of #Commish (Pre-Filmed)
A camera crew cuts backstage as Fat Fuck Carl makes his way to Lucious Starr's office. A mixture of a sock on the handle and very specific sounds causes him to stop; waiting for a long *sigh* before he knocks. FFC: Lucy!! It's Fat Fu... Lucious Starr: Just one second... *muffled words* A click is heard, Lucious opens the door wearing jeans. Just. Jeans. Carl glances in, noticing as Abbi Stein finishes buttoning up her top. She pushes past Carl, giving Lucy a quick tap on the shoulder. Starr grins, winking as Abbi walks off. Lucy invites Carl into the office... And soon is bombarded by Captain Pelican as well. Lucious Starr: What in blue... Carl. Please explain. Before FFC can comment, Pelican slaps a hand on Starr's desk. Captain Pelican: Lucy boy. Let's chat. I appreciate you going above the Commish and letting me in that match last week... Lucious Starr: Actually, I just gave Bob free reign. I didn't... Captain Pelican: And further, I appreciate you putting me in this match tonight with Alex Kanuck. Lucious Starr: I legit threw darts at a list of na... Captain Pelican: But I'm getting REAL antsy. I want my shot at the Bum Fight Championship. Problem is, Commish ain't gonna give it to me. Some personal vandetta from when I plowed his mama. Lucious Starr: Did you really f... Captain Pelican: So I know, despite your authority, you'll likely back LaMarsh when he keeps me from a title that SHOULD have my name written on it. But you see the numbers. You cut good deals for the sake of the company. You HAVE to be logical enough to see that Bo is WAY outta line here!! Lucious Starr: Look, Commish asked me to wat... Captain Pelican: You see how the crowd reacts when I'm out there!! And NBW is all about blood thirst, right? NOBODY is more bloodthirsty than me with the Cardboard Crown. So please, please do the right thing here!! Lucious stares blankly at Pelican. The Captain stares back, anticipating. Lucious tilts his head, raising an eyebrow. Lucious Starr: You done now? Cuz I can let you finish. Captain Pelican nods, Lucious shaking his head. He takes a deep breath, trying to sort things out. Lucious Starr: Okay, look. I only took over the Bum Fights division cuz Commish was busy recruiting or some shit. Pryde was gonna just let it slide, but Jo personally asked me to keep it going. So I threw darts at names. That being said... Lucious takes a seat, spinning in his chair. He places his elbows on his desk, interlocking his fingers and resting his chin on his hands. Lucious Starr: Here's the deal. You have a point; my job is to bring the ratings. And any time you are personally advertised in a Bum Fight, more people seem to come to the pre-show. So what I'm gonna do is simple. Next week, score is settled. You and Ol Jo in the ring. I'll talk to your fellow hobos and figure out a decent stipulation. But for now... I'm just not having this kind of bullshit on my plate. Captain Pelican damn near leaps over the table, embracing Lucious. Captain Pelican: Oh, thank you thank you THANK YOU!! I knew you were a wise man, I kn... Lucious Starr: LET. ME. GO. Pelican chuckles weakly as he releases Starr, backing away. Lucious stands, turning away from the pair. Lucious Starr: Thankfully, I was getting a shower anyways... Damn. Pelican and FFC exit the room as Starr opens a nearby cabinet, grabbing a towel and Armani suit. The door closes as he heads into his personal bathroom.
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:39:26 GMT -5
St Remi: What a night we have had this far. And we're not even half done yet!!
Sara Conway: Lucious Starr has REALLY lived up to his hype in aiding our boss make some AMAZING things happen here in NBW.
Charlie Hanson: The devil brings the calm before the storm. And you applaud it.
Sara Conway: Shut the hell up.
"Big Rings" by Drake and Future hits the PA, Abbi Stein rolling into the ring with a mic.
Abbi Stein: This next match... Yadda yadda yadda. First up is a guy who used to be in football, now he's a woman-beating misogynist. Which would be kinda hot if it wasn't outside of the confines of plowin a bitch. Travis McKenna, people.
McKenna rushes out and hypes himself up on the top of the ramp. He then confidently struts down the ramp and puts his fingers to his lips to shush the crowd. "Big Rings" dies down as the opening strains of "Uprising" play out.
Abbi Stein: And his opponent... He wears a mask; which is also kinky when you're getting busy. A flippy-do fucker. It's Dark Spectre.
Spectre enters, his arms outstretched as he takes in the reaction from the crowd. He embraces some fans while ignoring the jeers of others as he makes his way to the ring, jumping onto the barricade. He proceeds to signal the rosarie, jumping from the barricade onto the ring apron and sliding under the bottom rope. He springs up, crouching in the middle of the ring as he awaits the start of the match.
St Remi: At the... Ecstatic... Announcements by Abbi Stein, these two men are ready for battle!!
Abbi Stein: I'm paid to announce 'em, Rem. Nothing in my contract says I gotta be happy about it.
Sara Conway: Unfortunately, she has a point.
The bell rings, the two men circling the ring. Travis lurches forward, Spectre backtracking and bouncing up to the second rope. Travis collides with the ropes as Spectre backflips over McKenna, landing on his feet behind the bigger man and charging to the opposite side. Travis attempts a clothesline on the rebound, but Spectre ducks under and rebounds again. McKenna with a full body block, but the Chaos Killer slides under his legs, twisting around and kicking McKenna in the back of the knees. Travis buckles, dropping to his knees as Spectre charges past him; the rebound...
St Remi: A beautiful shining wizard right there!!
Sara Conway: Travis McKenna highly underestimating his opponent this week, and Spectre is using his speed to make McKenna eat his words early in this match.
Charlie Hanson: Dark Spectre has proven that he can hang with the big boys; I think Travis might have overlooked the danger in this luchador.
Travis hits the mat, Spectre dropping for an early count. Not even one as McKenna tosses him off, Spectre using the momentum to roll up to his feet and hop to the nearest turnbuckle.
St Remi: And Spectre is ready to once again go aerial. He seems to feel at home when he's flying.
Charlie Hanson: I spoke with Spectre earlier, and he said he can allow his mind to free itself when he actually LOSES control. Fascinating.
Spectre spins around into a moonsault flip, but is caught in mid-air. McKenna turns it into a powerslam, standing and posing for the crowd.
Sara Conway: It was a nice counter there; but is gloating really a good thing when dealing with an unpredictable force like Dark Spectre?
Abbi Stein: Hey, Sara. Are you playing this pool game on the Facebook? I need an opponent.
Sara Conway: I'm calling a match...
Abbi Stein: I'll send you an invite.
Spectre kip-ups to his feet as Travis turns, the bigger man charges up for a clothesline. Spectre ducks Matrix-style beneath the blow, pushing through into a hurricanrana as McKenna spins around. Dark Spectre flies to the nearest set of ropes, attempting a phoenix splash. McKenna rolls out of the way, Spectre landing on his feet...
Sara Conway: McKenna has him!! German suplex!!
St Remi: I don't like the look of that fall; Dark Spectre might have taken some serious damage.
Abbi Stein: Okay, I sunk three balls. Your turn, Sara.
Spectre minds his left shoulder as McKenna stands defiant over his prey, starting to realize what he's dealing with. He snatches up Spectre's left arm, using his power to torque in an arm bar. Spectre reaches out, trying to reach the nearest set of ropes. The referee drops, Chandra asking Spectre if he wants to submit; the Chaos Killer vehemently denying. Spectre surveys the ring, slowly pushing up on his right arm. A few half-pushups later, Spectre rolls McKenna into a pin. He gains a two count before Travis releases the hold and pushes Spectre off. Spectre rolls to the ropes, nursing his arm as Travis gets to his feet; McKenna storms over and lays feet to Spectre's arm.
Charlie Hanson: Oh, that... That's just dirty. Just stomping a mudhole through Dark Spectre's injured shoulder...
St Remi: It's not pretty, but it's legal. Ish.
Bettz counts up to four before McKenna relents; she scolds him as Spectre starts pulling himself out of the ring. McKenna turns around, charging up to Spectre and lifting him to his feet by his mask... Spectre grabs McKenna around the neck and drops!!
Charlie Hanson: Dark Spectre trying to stay alive here!!
Sara Conway: Not the cleanest move in the business, but it should buy him a few seconds to recover!
Spectre to one knee on the apron, Travis shakes off the counter and charges up. Spectre pulls back, hitting McKenna with a shoulder block to the abdomen. McKenna falls back, holding his gut and rushing back up with a BIG BOOT...
St Remi: Dark Spectre drops the top rope and effectively groins McKenna!!
Sara Conway: That bought him precious seconds, what with his injured arm.
Charlie Hanson: I'm usually behind Spectre, but that might have been a little close to the line for my ta...
Abbi Stein: Sara! Come on! I'm getting bored.
Spectre stretches his arm out, getting feeling back into his shoulder. He starts climbing onto the apron as McKenna falls to the mat, clutching his nuts. Chandra Bettz starts to count Spectre down, getting to 3 as he stands on the apron.
St Remi: Looks like Spectre is setting up for the end here...
Dark Spectre pulls back, jumping to the top rope and attempting a springboard frog splash...
Charlie Hanson: Boot to the face! Travis just countered!! He's on his feet and Dark Spectre is dazed!!
Sara Conway: HEAVY HITTER!! Spectre is down after that discus clothesline!!!
Travis goes for the cover.
1!! 2!! THREee...
Sara Conway: SO CLOSE!! Split seconds from a loss, Spectre kicks out on what I can only believe is instinct!!
Charlie Hanson: This is why I'm a fan of Spectre. He's a smaller guy, but he can stand up to the best of them. Truly a future World Champion.
St Remi: Let's not get ahead of ourselves.
McKenna confirms the two from the ref, berating Bettz for a slow count. Chandra shakes her head, Travis turning around and picking up a near limp Spectre. He hoists the smaller man onto his shoulders, taking a few steps forward...
St Remi: Here comes that running powerbomb...
Charlie Hanson: McKenna is gonna end this with the Bluegrass Bomb...
McKenna releases Dark Spectre, throwing him with a... NO!! Spectre, by will or just dumb luck, locks his legs around McKenna's neck, using his own momentum to throw the bigger man across the ring!! McKenna hits the ropes neck-first, having the wind and his senses knocked clear out of him. Spectre comes to life, running up to grab McKenna by the neck and charging up the turnbuckle...
St Remi: Sliced Bread #2!! He's setting up for...
Sara Conway: DARKNESS ABOUNDS!! Spectre has the submission locked in!!
Spectre with the crossface locked in, flips over McKenna into a bridge. Travis tries to fight his way out, reaching for the ropes but to no avail. He struggles for a few more moments, but his shortage of air and stamina eventually forces him to give in.
*DING DING DING*
Abbi Stein: Damn, that is... Oh. There's the winner, folks! Mucha Lucha!!
"Uprising" hits the speakers as Spectre rolls out of the bridge. He takes a few moments to recover, winded and still hurting from the injury earlier on.
St Remi: Somehow, Dark Spectre took that beating and still came out on top!!
Charlie Hanson: The adrenaline rush from gaining his second wind had to have let him torque through the pain. He's barely moving now.
Sara Conway: Whatever it was, Travis McKenna put up a hell of a fight, coming this close on two occasions to taking this one. There is no shame in defeat here tonight.
Abbi Stein: I gotta use the little girls' room. Need to send a pic back to this dude.
Sara Conway: You're sending dirty pics to each other now??
Abbi Stein: No. I'm sending them to him. He's wearing Armani. Fucking delicious.
Charlie Hanson: Ladies... Ugh. I think it's time for a commercial break...
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:39:40 GMT -5
Charlie Hanson: Up next, we have ourselves a triple threat match, and honestly, I think I already know who wins this, folks!
Sara Conway: You see Chaos winning, don’t you?
Charlie Hanson: How did you know? Are you psychic or something!?
"I Will Show You" By From Ashes To New blasts from the PA system, Matt Angel walks out and with his arms raised he walks down the ramp way high-fiving the fans. He jumps onto the apron and climbs the turnbuckle and also celebrates cheering to the fans.
Abbi Stein: Wake up, idiots! We got a triple threat match happening! First dude is the flippy dippy Matt Angel!
Sara Conway: On the flipside, here comes the underdog of the match, but quite honestly, after his win last week, he may just have the momentum to gain another win this week.
St. Remi: There’s no way he’s getting a victory over two sick guys like Kraus and Chaos! He’s in way over his head, dude!
Sara Conway: Well, either way it goes, this will be a good bout.
Emmit Kraus steps onto the stage as “Getting Away With Murder” plays him out. As the music cuts, he stops at the edge of the ramp and looks out among the crowd. He smirks as the music picks up and he continues walking to the ring.
Abbi Stein: Next dude coming to the ring is the creepy stab happy Emmit Kraus that names his knife… fucking weirdo.
Kraus steps onto the apron and climbs in, waiting now for the match to begin.
St. Remi: There’s that sick bastard! That’s who I’ve got my money on!
Sara Conway: Kraus was in another triple threat match at Blood Moon Rising, this one for the First Blood Championship, against FarCry and champion at the time, Kid Decay. Ultimately, it would be FarCry to win the belt. We'll see if Kraus can turn things around in this triple threat match.
Hollywood Undead starts to play as Chaos slowly makes his way to the ring. As he walks up the ring steps to enter the ring the four corner post explode with blue flame. Chaos enters the ring as the flames die and stands in the ring waiting for the match to start.
Abbi Stein: Finally, the big scary dude, Chaoooos! I'm gonna go now, BYE!
Charlie Hanson: WOAH! Chaos wasting no time as he crashes through both Kraus and Angel! Flipping them inside out after a double clothesline!
*DING DING DING*
Sara Conway: Buckle bomb to Angel!
Charlie Hanson: Another one to Kraus! He's on a roll! The match is his for the taking! Chaos turning this match into his playground!
*SLAM*
St. Remi: CHOKESLAM TO KRAUS!
*CRASH*
Charlie Hanson: CHAOTIC SPIRAL TO ANGEL! … But he's not going for the cover! What the hellsinki?
Chaos looks at the destruction he's caused and gives off a big roar. He then exits the ring. A cameraman attempts to follow him, but he pushes the camera, causing the cameraman to fall down the ramp.
Sara Conway: I'm… confused here. He had the match won, but decided to just… leave? I don't understand.
Kraus and Angel slowly make their way up, holding on to the ropes for leverage. Both of them are as confused as everyone else, but Kraus takes advantage of the confusion, and attacks Matt Angel.
Sara Conway: Well, back in the ring, Kraus has taken down Angel, and is getting some good ground and pound in with some vicious closed fists!
St. Remi: Angel blocks some and reverses into a quick roll up!
ONE!
TWO!
THR-- NO!!
Kraus kicks out and repeatedly stomps on Angel. He picks him up and throws him head first to the middle turnbuckle.
Sara Conway: Oh no. Kraus realizing that, although Chaos has left, this is still a triple threat match. He's exiting the ring, and looking underneath the apron for a weapon.
Kraus takes out a steel chair from underneath the apron and slides into the ring.
*CLINK*
Charlie Hanson: WOW! Angel saw it coming! Jumping heel kick bounces the steel chair to the head of Emmit Kraus! Blood instantly pouring from his forehead!
This fuels Kraus. He grabs Angel's head and starts pounding it on the top turnbuckle.
Sara Conway: Someone stop him! Blood is beginning to dye the back of Angel’s hair red!
St. Remi: SEBASTIAN!!!
Sara Conway: Oh goodness, no…
Emmit grabs Matt by the hair and raises his knife up, causing the crowd to stand up in suspense.
Charlie Hanson: Pele kick to Emmit’s hand! And then a dropkick, sending Kraus to the corner!
St. Remi: Emmit's reeling. Trying to get back to the offensive.
Charlie Hanson: THE PROPHECIES END!
St. Remi: Pin him!
Sara Conway: He has other plans. He's going up top… but on the entire other side of the ring. Oh my...
St. Remi: This lunatic is on the top of the ring post!
Sara Conway: Kraus is making his way up. He's stirring.
Charlie Hanson: HOLY SHIT!!!
Crowd: HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!
Sara Conway: The crowd agrees with you! An amazing corner to corner dropkick into a footstomp, all the way from the top of the ring post to the other side of the ring! What athleticism from Matt Angel!
Charlie Hanson: He's going for the pin!
ONE!
TWO!!
THREE!!!
*DING DING DING*
Sara Conway: A fantastic win from Matt Angel! Overcoming the odds, and gaining the respect of all of these fans! They're going nuts for him!
Charlie Hanson: I will be the first to admit that this young man proved me wrong. What a crobber bonker of a move, from a crobber bonker of a competitor!
St. Remi: Oh dude, not that phrase again. As much as I hate to say it, Matt Angel proved me wrong as well. He almost reminds me of myself…
Sara Conway: Before he continues to make less, and less sense, let's move on.
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:40:54 GMT -5
max masked yells "who gonna holla at ya boooooooiiiiiiiiiii" into the mic and then “got your money” by dirty starts to play when max comes out smokin a blunt with three or four half naked babes with him. Abbi Stein: Coming to the ring with a buncha hoes is the Blue Power Ranger! St. Remi: That's not his name... All the fans explode with cheers and Max gets in the ring and throws up the double middle fingers causing the fans to cheer louder. Sara Conway: Max’s red light district entourage heads to the back and now the lights have been cut off. “Freak Like Me” by Halestorm starts to play as white strobe lights dance along the stage. Out of the curtain steps KiD DeKaY with his deranged Picasso-esque face paint smeared all over and he smiles wide. Abbi Stein: Introducing his opponent, the Bob Ross of pain, KiD DeKaY! Charlie Hanson: Ha, he puts the pain in painter. KiD strides down the ramp with wacky movements until he slides into the ring. KiD struts up to Max and tilts his head smiling creepily before backing away to the center of the ring. St. Remi: New Blood original versus a Harlem streets inspiration in Max Masked. Sara Conway: Well let's get this show on the road then. Charlie Hanson: Max hears your demands, Sara as he lights KiD’s chest up with an array of knife edge chops. St. Remi: Max backs KiD into the corner and now KiD is irish whipped across the ring to the opposing corner, followed up by Max with a running leaping drop kick to KiD’s brow. Sara Conway: KiD stumbled forward and falls to the mat allowing Max to take to the top ropes. Charlie Hanson: The Harlem Hero is going to prove he can fly… LOOK OUT KID! St. Remi: Max comes off the top with a big time Harlem Hangover dropping a leg across KiD’s throat. Sara Conway: Smart on KiD’s part as he rolls to the outside to separate himself from Max. Charlie Hanson: POP GOES THE WEASEL! St. Remi: Max clears the top rope and lands a perfect Spaceman Plancha onto KiD DeKaY. Sara Conway: Ain't no rest for the wicked there and Max is ON FIRE! Charlie Hanson: Max has begun a victory lap high fiving fans around the ring and as he circles the ring, he comes back to KiD with a running basement drop kick to keep KiD down. St. Remi: Max showing some veteran forward thinking out there and now he brings KiD back to the inside of the ring for a pin attempt. Sara Conway: Zander flops down for the count. 1! 2!! Noooo!!!! St. Remi: KiD gets his shoulder up and Max grabs a handful of hair, lifting KiD up to his dazed feet.
Charlie Hanson: A few well placed European uppercuts send KiD to the corner and Max salutes him with a double deuce before backing to the far corner. Sara Conway: Max points to KiD and screams KiD out loud as he runs across the ring. St. Remi: Max looking for a running big boot but KiD ducks it and Max is caught up on the top rope. KiD acts fact and wraps Max’s foot in the ropes before wailing on him with a barrage of hockey-esque punches. Charlie Hanson: High and low, high and low… Max is being lit up there. Sara Conway: KiD lifts Max to the rope now and he lands some well placed chops for good measure before hitting a leaping hurricanrana bringing Max to the mat. St. Remi: It looks like its KiD’s turn to fly as he takes to the top rope and he spreads his arms out to the NBW Thirsty. Charlie Hanson: POP GOES THE WEASEL!! Sara Conway: KiD comes down hard with a double foot stamp onto Max’s chest. St. Remi: KiD pulls Max up by the mask and he pulls him into a front facelock. Charlie Hanson: KiD is looking to put Max out here. Sara Conway: No! Max wiggles out and lands a Superkick that stuns KiD. St. Remi: Max kicks KiD in the gut and double underhooks KiD’s arms and he drills him to the mat with THE FACE OFF! Charlie Hanson: Max drops down for the pin followed by Zander making waves.
1! 2!! 3!!!!
DING DING DING! St. Remi: And that's all she wrote for the DeKaYdEnT one. Abbi Stein: The Blue Ranger wins, yay. Sara Conway: Here comes the ladies of the night to congratulate their pimp…
St. Remi: What the hell? The hoes were all shoved off the ramp! Charlie Hanson: Ex World Champion Cassidy Kaine plows them down as he runs to the ring and tackles Max to the mat. Sara Conway: Cass is relentless here trying to punch Max’s face off. St. Remi: Zander grabs up Cassidy with a bear hug and Max rolls out of the ring clinching his face. Charlie Hanson: Max will live to fight another day, but can we get his ladies checked on? Sara Conway: We had medics out there, but folks the show must go on, stay tuned.
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:57:13 GMT -5
Cameras open to the slimy grin of "Fat Fuck" Carl Penske with his gold "FFC" themed microphone.
FFC: Dave, we rolling? Yes? Goodie.... So I'm here with our Bum Fights Commissioner, Jo Lamarche.
Commish: I am here and I am damn angry.
FFC: Great, and why are you still trying to keep Captain Pelican down?
Commish: He thinks this is his division. He's not the champ - and he sure as hell is not the Commish--
FFC: Yes, but aren't you worried that he's obsessed? It seems everything makes the Captain keep coming back.
Commish: And more.
Carl motions for a close-up.
FFC: Commissioner, do you think that anything can stop this man?
Commish: I will stop him come hell or ice or--
FFC: And what about next weeks match?
Commish: What match?
FFC: Lucious just announced it on Twitter. You and the Captain are in a match.
Lamarche's eyes grows bigger than the moon.
FFC: Well the stipulation are not know yet. But you have to think Mr. #2 has, well, something in store for you both next week.
Commish: That son of--
FFC: All right, bye.... So that's the Commissioner everyone. And that should be the best reminder to arrive early to next week's show. Because we will see the anger rise again. Captain Pelican continues his run as Old Jo Lamarche returns after three years in hiatus. What else can we say, but let's get ready for the violence. I'm Carl Penske... back to you guys.
Cut back to the arena.
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:57:29 GMT -5
St. Remi: Ayyy, New Blood Thirsty! Let's hear it for ya boys in the office, booking the most exciting matches in the industry today!
Conway: This is the fight that's been brewing ever since Vincent Pryde bought out UCI and merged our rosters -- Bonnie Blue sees the Women's Division as a setback to equality, and she's looking to make an example of the former Women's champ here tonight!
Hanson: And our little Mexican firecracker has beef of her own with the Daughter of Time -- Vandalia almost singlehandedly created this division, and Bonnie Blue has done nothing but disrespect her hard work!
St. Remi: That was shockingly cogent, Charlie. Now… let's welcome our competitors to the ring!
The arena darkens as the first set of the heavy strums of “Big Gun” by Sonic Mayhem blast the PA system, only silhouettes are seen at different parts of the crowd. Once the first strum of the second set is sounded, L Verez is revealed from one side of the arena crowd. The second strum strikes, revealing Bonnie Blue on another side. The third strike reveals both Sam Kidsgrove and Andre Jenson.
Abbi Stein: The following match is scheduled for ONE FALL! First to the ring, being accompanied by the Insurgency -- BONNIE BLUE!!!
The music intensifies, as does the frantic lighting, as well as the expressions on the faces of The Insurgency, as they march down the stairs with authority, with the UCI faithful high fiving and fist bumping each member. The New Blood Thirsty showing disdain towards them, some even trying to get physical, until realizing that they're in over their heads.
Each member reaches the ringside area, surrounding the squared circle. They all quickly roll in and step up to the second turnbuckle, showing their three finger salute to the crowd. The UCI Faithful salute back, chanting “STAND. FIGHT. RESIST.” meanwhile, the New Blood Thirsty boo, some even throwing garbage at The Insurgency. As the music and lighting fade, the group get to the center of the ring and huddle up, discussing their game plan.
Conway: They may be banned from ringside during the main event, but the Insurgency aren't about to let this opportunity pass them by.
Halestrom’s “I am the Fire" hits the speakers as lights flicker across the stage in a hypnotic strobe effect. Intensifying rhythm builds to a dramatic drumbeat; the edge of the stage flares in an eruption of pyro and illuminates the solitary figure of Vandalia. A massive cheer rises from the crowd.
Abbi Stein: And her opponent -- the former New Blood Wrestling Women's Champion; she's the ever gorgeous Desert Rose -- VANDALIA!!!
Vandalia struts down the aisle, trading high fives and fist bumps with the fans along the way. At ringside, she leaps to the apron, turning with a whip of her hair to pose for the raucous audience. She slips through the ropes and jogs a quick lap around the ring, then ascends the corner. Leaning out, she shapes her hands into a heart in front of her chest, smiling brightly at her fans.
Hanson: This foxy lady doesn't let anything get her dow-- OHMYGAWD! The Insurgency attacking the former Women's Champ!
Bonnie Blue charges in first, pulling the other woman down off the turnbuckle with a modified slam. Immediately, she pops back up and starts laying boots to Vandalia, as Kidsgrove and L join in!
St. Remi: Here comes the official to break it up! Warning the Insurgency now as they leave the ring to prowl the outside!
Referee Zander Hobbs checks on Vandalia, who waves him off as she gets to her feet, glaring daggers at a cocky Bonnie Blue.
*DING! DING! DING!*
Conway: There's the bell, and now it's Vandalia on the offense with a powerful open hand strike to the face of Bonnie Blue!
Hanson: Blue shaking it off, answers with a big bitch slap of her own!
The two women back away, circling each other warily, Bonnie rubbing at her jaw as she eyes her opponent in calculating coldness. They charge -- lock up -- Vandalia struggling, but Bonnie Blue has the leverage and quickly shifts her hold; lifts and drops her opponent!
St. Remi: Snap suplex from Bonnie Blue; that ring experience on full display right now as she hauls the Desert Rose back to her feet -- and sends her right down to the mat again with a European uppercut!
Blue with a quick cover, and Hobbs drops to make the count!
ONE . . . TWO . . .
Conway: And a strong kickout just before the three!
Up to a vertical base again, Bonnie pulls Vandalia to a standing position, then slings her toward the ropes.
Hanson: Irish whip! Vandalia on the rebound with a clothesline -- DENIED! Blue ducks the attempt and sends the Desert Rose across to the far side! Another rebound!
St. Remi: Not quite, as her ankle is grabbed by Kidsgrove on the outside!
Vandalia stops herself, barely regaining her balance, and turns to scowl down at Sam Kidsgrove as he lets go. Turning on the full force of his celebrity charm, he winks and grins at her, keeping her distracted as Bonnie Blue takes several steps backward.
Conway: Look out!
Bonnie charges at Vandalia! Vandalia turns around to face her and sidesteps -- a split second too late! Both competitors tumble to the ringside mats!
Hanson: HOLY GUACAMOLE!
Bonnie Blue and Vandalia over the ropes to the outside! The Insurgency not interfering yet, but urging Bonnie to stand again! Blue uses the guardrail to pull herself upright. The Insurgency keep their distance under the watchful eye of Zander Hobbs as Bonnie grabs Vandalia by the hair, hauling her up into a bear hug from behind.
St. Remi: Blue with a bear hug, but the former Women's Champ comes back to life and elbows her way out of it! She shoves Bonnie Blue into the crowd barrier! To the apron!
Conway: Kidsgrove moving in!
Hanson: She sees him! These boots are made for stomping!
Vandalia sends Sam Kidsgrove to the floor! Vandalia now shifts her attention to Bonnie Blue. Sensing the window of opportunity closing, she jumps off the ring apron --
St. Remi: NO!! The Hardcore Queen out of the way just in the nick of time and Vandalia crashes into the ringside barricade!
Blue quick to capitalize -- ignoring the referee’s order to get back in the ring!
Conway: Bonnie Blue with a fistful of tights -- runs Vandalia into the ringpost!
Meanwhile, the official begins the count.
One.. Two..
Vandalia stumbles away from the post, dazed and favoring her shoulder. She drops to her knees and lifts the edge of the apron, trying to crawl under, but Bonnie drags her back out!
Three.. Four..
Hanson: That collision with the ringpost may have done some damage!
Blue staying in control as she lifts the Desert Rose and tosses her onto the ring apron!
Five --
St. Remi: The official's count broken up as Bonnie rolls Vandalia under the ropes and follows her into the ring.
Shaking off the cobwebs, Vandalia gets to her feet, not even waiting for the next assault as she hits the ropes. Conway: Springboard moonsault from the former Women's Champ! Halting the momentum of Bonnie Blue, she follows up with a victory roll!
Hanson: If Vandalia can put away the former UCI World Champion, what an upset that would be! Schoolgirl pin!
St. Remi: There's no ref to count the pinfall!
Andre Jenson on the apron, causing some kind of commotion! Hobbs has had enough of Jenson’s antics, and turns around just as Bonnie powers out of Vandalia’s hold. Blue springs to her feet, waits for her opponent to get back up, and…
Conway: Superkick!
Vandalia out of it now as Bonnie Blue sets up that infamous inverted mat slam -- WEEPING ANGEL! She rolls the Desert Rose over and hooks the leg!
ONE . . . TWO . . . THREE ! ! !
*DING! DING! DING!*
Rihanna’s “Same Old Mistakes" hits the speakers to a pop from the UCI Faithful as referee Zander Hobbs lifts Bonnie's arm into the air! Without warning, the rest of the Insurgency swarm the ring, chasing away the official as they surround Vandalia.
Hanson: I don't like the looks of this! Insurgency circling like a flock of seagulls!
St. Remi: One day, I'm going to get a Charlie-to-English dictionary and find out what the heck you're saying, bro. But either way, they have the former Women's Champ cut off from any help whatsoever!
The circling stops. Out of nowhere, L Verez rushes forward with a big knee strike!
Conway: To the face! That savage knee may have knocked Vandalia out!
Hanson: L isn't done yet, applying an armbar from behind that keeps Vandalia upright!
While Verez keeps pressure on the right arm of Vandalia, Kidsgrove and Blue take turns dishing out punishment to the former Women's Champ.
St. Remi: Where's security? Why isn't anyone stopping this?
At last, L releases Vandalia, who slumps to the canvas. Verez nudges the other woman underneath the ropes with her boot, before joining the others as they parade around the ring to a mixed reaction from the crowd. All four climb the turnbuckles to strike a triumphant pose.
Conway: The Insurgency standing tall here tonight as a battered Vandalia slips underneath the ring.
Hanson: What could she possibly be doing under there?
Confident in having made their point, Bonnie Blue, L Verez, Sam Kidsgrove, and Andre Jenson leap back down from their corners. They take another victory lap around the ring, when suddenly --
St. Remi: Here comes Vandalia again! Out from beneath the ring and looking fresher than the start of the match! Onto the apron and over the ropes!
Conway: Vandalia back in the ring and cleaning house! Forearm to Kidsgrove! Running knee to Verez! Stunner to Jenson!
Vandalia turns now to face Bonnie, fire blazing in her eyes as she charges across the ring!
Hanson: Stiff clothesline to the Daughter of Time, and now it's Bonnie Blue laid out on the canvas!
Vandalia stands over the fallen Bonnie Blue, a triumphant smile on her lips. Discretion being the better part of valor, however, she chooses not to linger as the Insurgency members pick themselves up, one by one. Exiting the ring, she flounces back up the ramp, thrusting three fingers overhead in mockery of the Insurgency salute as the four look on from the ring.
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:57:50 GMT -5
Andre Aquarius vs Mya Denton
New Freezer by Rich the Kid hits the arena. A thick smoke fills the stage and ramp areas and a ice blue lighting smothers everything as the beat starts to vibrate through the area. As the beat drops, Andre Aquarius emerges on the stage with his Tru Grit draped over his shoulder, hyping himself up and soaking in a chorus of boos. Abbi Stein: Introducing that Kunta Light skin Tru Grit Champion of ours, Andre Aquarius! He makes his way down the entrance ramp, pounding a fist against his chest. He steps through the ropes, surveying his surroundings. He climbs to the top turnbuckle patting his title, mouthing the words to the song as his shoulders shimmy back and forth before dropping down and leaning against the ropes. Andre hands his title to one of the ring monkeys before he chills awaiting Mya. St. Remi: Pryde is legit opening up about this whole women versus men thing, isn't he? Sara Conway: I don't know, he doesn't seem like a man who'd do this without having something up his sleeve. "Paint it Black" cues up as Mya walks out before either walking or skipping(mostly skipping) down to the ring. Abbi Stein: Hey guys its the crazy chick of NBW… aren't you excited? When she get's to the ring she steps inside after wiping her feet on the apron and then sitting on the middle rope. She stares awkwardly at Andre and then she smiles wide. Sara Conway: Zander Hobbs refereeing this one and he brings both opponents to the center of the ring. St. Remi: Well he calls for the bell and we are off folks. Charlie Hanson: I'm curious to see what Mya’s approach is going to be here… I'd guess a lot of leg kicks and schoolboy attempts. St. Remi: What are you a fortune teller, Chuck? Mya doing just that, she lands a flurry of kicks to Andre’s left leg and she rolls him up. Zander barely able to get done for the count. 1!!! Noooo!!!! Sara Conway: Too early and the bigger Andre is backup smirking at Mya. Charlie Hanson: I wouldn't have a smile off with a crazy woman like Mya… St. Remi: Andre approaches Mya but is met with a spin kick to the gut and a stiff European uppercut, but Andre doesn't take much force from it. Aquarius on the offensive here and he Irish whips Mya across the ring followed up by a knee to the gut. Andre casually backs away but throws an elbow back for good measure that rocks Mya. Charlie Hanson: Andre is vicious tonight… Think he's fighting for his lady? St. Remi: Well Mya’s bell sure got rang there, Chuck. Sara Conway: Andre is literally strutting away and showing that unmatchable swagger that the NBW fans love. Charlie Hanson: He sure be careful… Never take your eyes off an unstable woman… St. Remi: Well he's going to pay for it because Mya slithers toward Andre and she catches him as he turns around with a pop up hurricanrana that sends Andre skidding across the mat. Charlie Hanson: The pint sized psycho keeps on him with a follow up Bully choke that she pulls back as far as his small frame can. Andre his thrashing about and he moves Mya with ease here… Sara Conway: Well the move was short lived there as Andre gets his foot on the rope but Andre his holding his throat on the ground there as Zander pulls Mya back. Charlie Hanson: POP GOES THE WEASEL!!! MYA JUST KICKED ANDRE’S FACE OFF!! St. Remi: I suppose she didn't appreciate Zander stopping her lock as she just penalty kicked Andre in the teeth there… God that had to of hurt. Charlie Hanson: Andre is smart though, he rolled outside to get himself in order and maybe count the teeth he has left. Sara Conway: Zander looks to be scolding Mya like an overprotective father, but she doesn't look to be taking too kindly to his words. St. Remi: Sweet lord this chick IS CRAZY! Charlie Hanson: Mya leaps off of Zander’s fat stomach and she flies over the top rope onto Andre on the outside! Did that just happen, folks? Sara Conway: I give Mya Denton all the credit in the world for originality here and she really is stepping up her game. St. Remi: Mya lifts Andre up and she rolls him into the ring following up with ascending the apron. Charlie Hanson: Andre is playing opossum!!! Sara Conway: Andre thrust kicks Mya’s legs out and she lands face first onto the ring apron! St. Remi: Zander checking on Mya but she pushes him away and she's back in this thing. Charlie Hanson: Andre throws a kick to Mya’s stomach and she doubles over… Andre drops her with a stiff DunkInfusion! St. Remi: But no pin attempt? Sara Conway: Andre is looking to prove something here as he pulls Mya back to a dazed standing position… He makes sure she is standing okay and he backs away measuring her up… Charlie Hanson: POP GOES THE WEASEL! Andre hits the ropes and returns with RodneysRevenge!! St. Remi: Zander plops down for the pin attempt! 1! 2!! 3!!! DING DING DING! St. Remi: This one is over folks and Andre slides out of the ring grabbing his title from one of the ring monkeys. Abbi Stein: Your winner is our Tru Grit Champion, Andre Aquarius! Sara Conway: Plenty of ACTION here folks, stay tuned for even more!
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:58:08 GMT -5
Starr-nanigans!! (aka Watch Me Boss Man)
"One For The Money" by Escape The Fate hits the loudspeakers as a spotlight shines onto the entrance ramp. Lucious Starr emerges from the back, decked in a pinstriped Armani suit. He makes his way to the ring, handing out high fives and fist bumps. He climbs into the ring, waiting for the crowd to die down before raising a microphone to his lips. Lucious Starr: Good evening, Thirsty!! Have y'all enjoyed the show so far?? The Thirsty rain cheers and whoops, Lucious smiling as he takes it all in. He raises a hand, silencing the crowd. Lucious Starr: I'm glad. All of you here in the Garden, as well as the multitudes of Thirsty at home have made us what we are. Vincent Pryde and myself are so grateful for all the support you have shown us during this recent transition, and we are pleased to bring you more of the action and bloodshed that you love!! More cheers, Lucious nods. He reaches into his breast pocket, pulling out a piece of paper. He looks it over, then out to the crowd. Lucious Starr: Speaking of action, we have our second pay-per-view of the year coming up in less than two weeks. Belated Bloody Valentine will see many of our titles once again on the line. The question at hand is, who will be facing these champions? The crowd is a mix of names, some shouting "Shadowlove" or "Travis McKenna" or "Sam Kidsgrove". Lucious chuckles, holding up the paper. Lucious Starr: Ladies and Germs, we have it. Next week, in our main event. Corey Bull will be sitting in on commentary as his potential challengers duke it out- in a FATAL FOUR WAY MATCH!! The crowd is roaring; this certainly means bloodshed. Lucious grins, nodding. Lucious Starr: There are four names for this match. Vincent Pryde and myself have each personally chosen one competitor. A third was picked from YOUR influence over merchandise sales, Nielsen ratings and general social media involvement. And the fourth was actually a pick from our locker room itself; someone who several people picked over anyone else. The Megatron lights up with four shadowed figures, sublined with an image of the World Title. Lucious Starr: The first entry into the Main Event, the personal pick for Vincent Pryde- Special K, KENDRICK KROSS!!! Kross' picture illuminates over the first spot with cheers emanating from the crowd. Lucious Starr: Our second entry!! My personal choice, and the true underdog story... HUNG GARY!! Gary's picture lights up beside Kross', to a mixture of low cheers and murmurs of utter confusion. Lucious Starr: The third entry! Selling the most personal merch on NBWStore.com; lighting up Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, Snapchat, Tinder, TMZ.com and others... Thirsty, I give you YOUR choice- SHADOWLOVE!! The crowd is again all cheers and hollers as Shadowlove's image joins Kross and Gary. Lucious nods, scanning his sheet of paper once more. Lucious Starr: And last, but certainly not least. When asked "who, besides yourself, deserves a shot at our World Heavyweight Champion?" An overwhelming three people chose... Wait... Okay, look. St Remi is indeed a great athlete. But he isn't on the active roster. St Remi: Someone suggested me?? Abbi Stein: I heard Fat Fuck say your name. I figured I'd go along with it as a joke. Didn't know people were gonna end up giving you the majority. Lucious looks down to Remi, shrugging. Lucious Starr: Welp... You want the spot, Rems? Remi shakes his head, raising an active mic. St Remi: While I do appreciate the sentiment, Mr Starr, I prefer to be on THIS side of the ring nowadays. Lucious nods, shrugging. He turns to the Megatron, raising an eyebrow. Lucious Starr: Welp. In that case, I will be in serious talks with Vincent Pryde to determine the fourth entry into next week's match. For now... Well, we have the first three. So enjoy the rest of the show, Thirsty!! "One For The Money" hits the speakers, Lucious tossing the mic to a stagehand. He casually makes his way up the entrance ramp, doling out fives and handshakes as he makes his way to the back. Abbi Stein: Too chicken to step back in the ring, huh? St Remi: Hell no! I simply prefer not to get involv... Sara Conway: In a World Title Contendership match? Yeah, you're scared. St Remi: I'm not afraid of anybody! I'll face anyone you wanna throw... Charlie Hanson: Hey, Corey. St Remi: OMIGAWD NO... You're an ass.
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:58:26 GMT -5
My Own Summer plays loudly as a spotlight shines on a smoke filled entrance way. The smoke clears as the lyrics start and FarCry is seen standing in the smoke. He walks slowly down to the ring with his hair over his face.
Abbi Stein: The next match is scheduled...for one fall like always. First out weighing...I forgot my notes whatever it’s FarCry!
St. Remi: On his way to the ring for another one of Pryde’s fun intergender match ups.
He gets to the ring and jumps on the apron as the chorus blares and he rocks his head back revealing the bearded and brooding face of a man ready to fight. He climbs into the ring and finds a neutral corner, removes his shirt and prepares for battle. "Versace" by Migos plays as the lights in the arena dim, walking out from the back wearing a obnoxiously bright gold Versace robe, is Brooke Bell along with her Women’s Championship.
St. Remi: Neither competitor seems eager to have to fight one another, for different reasons.
Abbi Stein: And now coming to the ring is the Women’s Champion, since I don’t want to take it from her. Brooke Bell!
Looking down at some of the jewelry on her wrist, flossing it for the crowd. Starting her trek down to the ring now, taking her time ignoring the fans disdain. Stopping as she reaches the bottom of the ramp to do a little bit of a spin before walking around the edge of the ring. Sitting on the edge as she holds up a finger, telling the crowd to wait as she removes her necklace, her watch, and the rest of her extensive jewelry which she places in a bag that she sets in her corner. As she tosses off her robe before stepping into the ring where she proceeds to wait for the match to start.
DING DING DING.
The match starts but neither competitor makes a move, Brooke seeming slightly maybe nervous about facing a male. While on the other end FarCry seems very unwilling to fight a female. The fans of course eager for some violence start to boo as neither engages.
Charlie Hanson: It appears both are taking a stand against this!
They both circle around almost seeming ready to engage but neither do again, instead we hear the sound of Vincent Pryde as he walks out onto the stage with a microphone both Brooke, the ref, and FarCry turn to look up at him.
Vincent Pryde: Enough stalling we need to fight! If just a regular match isn’t enough to get you to going. Than I’ll allow the winner a special treat. The winner can select their opponent for Bloody Valentine, almost like you get to pick your Valentine!
Pryde laughs at his own joke as FarCry seems to continue to show his disapproval of the match, shaking his head. Brooke now with some motivation, comes behind him landing a big low blow right into a roll up. The ref only turning back in time to see the roll up.
1! 2! 3!
FarCry kicks out but it’s a moment to late as he kicks Brooke off and she rolls out of the ring smiling as she grabs her Women’s title.
Abbi Stein: Here is your winner, Brooke Bell!
Jumping up to his feet FarCry caught off guard a bit kicks the rope in frustration as Brooke walks around the ring clutching her belt laughing at how she just stole this one from him.
St. Remi: Got to give her credit for being clever she just stole that one away from FarCry to remain undefeated. FarCry will most likely come back more motivated than ever.
Brooke turns now dancing up the ramp pleased with herself as FarCry tries to discuss with the ref what happened but isn’t able to get through to him.
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:58:39 GMT -5
Shit, people gun get fucked, ya'll
St Remi: Ladies and gentlemen, it’s time for our main event as Corey Bull, our tremendous Champion takes on L Verez of the Insurgency!
Sara Conway: And let’s not forget, they are all banned from ringside!
Charlie Hanson: AND RIGHTLY SO! ALL THEY’VE DONE SINCE THEY GOT HERE IS FUCK THINGS UP!
St Remi: Well we’ll certainly hope that Corey can…..
Charlie Hanson: WHAT THE FUCK? WHAT IS IT NOW?
Sara Conway: Fire alarm I think…
Sure enough the fire alarm is going off around the entire arena.
WEEWAAWWEEWAAWEEWAAWEEWWAAWWEEWWAA
Abbi Stein gets on the mic
Abbi: Ladies and. Well, fuck it whatever., There’s a fire alarm or something why the fuck are you still standing there? Get out of the arena. SAVE YOURSELVES!
St Remi: Well this is a first! Do we have to evacuate?
Sara Conway: Yeah, I’m getting it in my ear now, we’ve all gotta go.
WEEWAAWWEEWAAWEEWAAWEEWWAAWWEEWWAA
St Remi: OK, We’ll be right back after these messages folks!
The commentary booth goes silent as the NBW commentary team follow the rest of the people out of the building as commercials hit.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
We return to absolute Chaos outside the arena as the fire alarm is still going on. Firefighters are at the scene, discussing with Vincent Pryde the options. Fans are milling around and no one knows what’s going on. There is no obvious fire.
WEEWAAWWEEWAAWEEWAAWEEWWAAWWEEWWAA
The firefighters after a few minutes finally get the alarm switched off, giving the go ahead for fans to re-enter the arena. When they reach the concourse, however, the doors are sealed by a few hundred LARPERs. Each one has home made armour and stand to attention at the door like sentries, not letting anyone through. The doors are locked and they are the gatekeepers. In fact, they forcibly move some fans away in order to keep anyone from getting through the doors to the arena. Suddenly, every monitor in the arena and concourse, as well as the ones outside the arena come to life with static. Eventually forming a picture. 4 people, standing in the ring of the now empty arena.
Jenson: Vincent Pryde. Your actions have consequences. I don’t care if it is you, Commish Lamarche, Lucius Starr, or whoever it is calling the shots. If you try to stop the Insurgency we will make a stand.
Kidsgrove: You see, UCI faithful. Whoever is running this shit show right now has banned your UCI Intercontinental Champion, one half of one of the most famous UCI tag champions, and a bonafide UCI hall of famer from ringside for this match. We think that is unacceptable and a flagrant abuse of power by the disgrace that calls themselves the managers of this organisation. If you abuse the Insurgency, we’re going to resist.
Bonnie: Ya’ll see, we’ll fight fire with fire. It’s pretty simple really. The Insurgency is banned from ringside. That’s fine. We play by the rules here, we got honour. However, if the Insurgency is banned from ringside, so are the NBW thirsty. So we’re not letting any fan in this here buildin’ unless they are UCI faithful. So I kindly ask for anyone wearing UCI merch...
Jenson: Or Insurgency merch.
Bonnie: Oh ye, or Insurgency merch. We kindly ask that you make yourself known to Amy over in block A. She’ll let you through. Anyone else, well, ya’ll need to stay out there and we’ll come join ya shortly.
Jenson: Let it be known that NBW will not push us around, if they stipulate unfair sanctions on this group, we will reply in kind. We will overcome. We will Stand. We WIll Resist and we will fight.
Kidsgrove: So, Vincent Pryde - you blood sucking piece of shit. It’s your move, play if you dare. Let’s get on with this match.
Kidsgrove drops the mic as Big Gun hits the arena, some of the UCI faithful are starting to trickle into the arena now and cheer as the 3 barred members of the Insurgency leave for the concourse area. The UCI commentary crew also come out and take the seats in the vacant commentary booth. The NBW crew being barred outside the arena like everyone else.
Jimmy Garcia: Well folks! We’re back! What a shocking turn of events. All of NBW, including the fans is barred from ringside thanks to Jenson’s LARPING crew.
Petrov: Jenson LARP fuck good, Petrov Happy.
Dani Applegate: Let’s get started with the match! Here is Taylor Lorde!
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Post by Action Reel on May 5, 2020 16:59:15 GMT -5
Taylor Lorde: Welcome back, UCI Faithful! The following main event match is scheduled for one fall! Already in the ring, representing UCI and the Insurgency -- she is the Protector of the Universe, the FemAlien… ELLLL VERREZZZ!!!
Jimmy Garcia: Verez looking focused in that ring right now!
Dani Applegate: Focused and confident, Jimmy! Coming off a tag team win over Corey Bull and Shadowlove last week will do that for a lady.
Petrov: Petrov like pretty alien girl. She fight like great Siberian bear!
"The Curse" by Disturbed plays over the speakers and the monster known as Corey Bull walks out to the top of the ramp, four feet of logging chain draped over his shoulder.
Taylor Lorde: "Coming to the ring at this time, weighing in at 385 pounds and hailing from the Great Northwoods.... Your NBW World Heavyweight Champion -- THE HATEBRINGER COREY BULL!
Bull whips his hair back and stretches his arms out to his sides and the ramp lights up as an explosion rocks the ramp area and a mushroom cloud floats to the ceiling. Bull marches to the ring, climbing in and walking to the center of the ring. He stares out at the crowd and raises his hands above his head and crosses the wrists and the crowd cheers him on.
Jimmy Garcia: Just a quick reminder, although Corey Bull is the world champ, the title is not on the line here tonight.
Dani Applegate: Of course not. This is all part of an obvious anti-Insurgency bias.
Petrov: Bias is for pussy fucks. Petrov observe that Bull also look focused. Is probably want payback for last week.
*DING! DING! DING!*
Jimmy Garcia: The Champ doesn't hesitate; Bull leaps straight into action, making a lunge toward L. Verez out of the way with a back handspring!
Dani Applegate: And back to her feet in an instant! The FemAlien charging in -- DROPKICK to the knee of Corey Bull!
Petrov: Alien girl pull big flashy moves right out of gate. Is good way to wear out early in match.
Jimmy Garcia: To your point, Petrov, that speed and agility are L Verez’s best weapons in this match! Verez delivers a series of swift kicks to the back of Bull's leg, concentrating her efforts on keeping him off his feet.
Dani Applegate: L going behind Bull now. She gets hold of his hand, and is pulling back mercilessly on his fingers!
In the background, fans continue to trickle in, all wearing their UCI or newly-purchased Insurgency merch. More of Jenson’s seemingly endless LARP security forces guide the fans to ringside. A cheer goes up from the crowd as, with a final stomp, Verez releases Corey Bull’s fingers.
Petrov: Is better strategy on display now from alien girl. Now she bend Hatebringer arm over shoulder. Is painful move -- even make Petrov uncomfortable! Only way out is --
*WHAM!*
Jimmy Garcia: -- is evidently a modified Judo throw! L hits the mat hard and Bull pops back to his feet!
Dani Applegate: There went L’s advantage! Bull now working a submission of his own as he pulls Verez into a figure four!
Petrov: Reversal! Velez turn leglock against Bull! In home country, this is marriage proposal!
Jimmy Garcia: Uh, good to know. Anyway, Bull powers out with ease and drags Verez up with him. He lifts the FemAlien up for a powerbomb…
Verez fights back, laying elbows to the head of Corey Bull. Bull rushes across the ring to drop L into the corner!
Dani Applegate: No! A bucklebomb! Bull now propping Verez up in the corner!
Petrov: Petrov cannot watch!
Petrov covers his eyes with both massive hands, peeking through tiny cracks between his fingers as the Champ takes several steps back. He pauses, measuring the distance and lining up his shot.
Jimmy Garcia: I hope L Verez likes trains, because Corey Bull has a head of steam, and he's charging in like a locomotive!
Dani Applegate: Big corner clothesline from Corey Bull!
Crowd: BOOOOOO!!!!
The impact lifts Verez off her feet. She slumps against the turnbuckles as Bull takes a step back.
Petrov: Champ loading big right fist… MISSES as Velez gets second wind and ducks under reach! Pretty alien behind Bull again! Stomp to back of knee!
Jimmy Garcia: Verez going back to work on that same leg she targeted earlier, doing everything she can to cut the big man down to size!
L breaks off the attack and makes a dash for the ropes; she rebounds --
Dani Applegate: Hurricanrana from L Verez and now it's Corey Bull slumped in the corner! Verez keeping up the assault, showing everybody in this audience that she is done playing nice!
Petrov: L now standing on ropes, landing punches on head of Bull. In home country, this is how you accept marriage proposal!
Jimmy Garcia: Probably not the case here tonight, buddy! Verez just raining lefts and rights down on Bull, and the referee finally coming over to give L a warning.
She seems to ignore the official, unleashing fist after fist -- only stopping as the ref’s count reaches four.
Dani Applegate: Verez close to a disqualification, now being backed off by the referee.
Unsteady on his feet, Bull uses the ropes to keep his balance, taking a moment to catch his breath as L argues with the official.
Petrov: Something happen in audience… man in gray hoodie just climb over barricade!
Jimmy Garcia: We can't worry about that, now! Corey Bull looking fired up -- here he comes!
Verez sees him coming, grabs the top rope, and drops, pulling down the rope as Bull crashes into the ref instead of L. The momentum carries both men down to the floor. The FemAlien leaps back up to a cheer from the crowd -- cut short when the figure in the hoodie climbs up onto the ring apron on the far side. Caught up in the moment, L doesn't notice the hooded figure. She backs across the ring, looking to build momentum for a plancha -- just as he springboards off the ropes!
Dani Applegate: Codebreaker!
The stranger rises, pausing dramatically as he stares at the downed Verez for a moment. Then, with theatrical flair, he draws back to hood to reveal the face of --
Crowd: *GASP!*
Petrov: NYET! NO WAY!
Jimmy Garcia: No -- BLACK DEATH! KEVIN BISHOP IS IN THE HOUSE THAT PRYDE BUILT!
Bishop climbs back out of the ring as Corey Bull rises once more. The two men hesitate, then, with a grin, Kevin Bishop helps his former tag team partner roll the groggy official back under the ropes, into the ring. Bull follows and rolls up Verez for an easy pin.
ONE . . . TWO . . . THREE ! ! !
*DING! DING! DING!*
Dani Applegate: What the hell did we just see happen? Taylor Lorde: Your winner, by pinfall -- your NBW World Heavyweight Champion, the Hatebringer…. COREY BULL!!!
“The Curse" by Disturbed hits the speakers as the official hands Bull his World Title. When his attempt to raise the big man's hand is shrugged off, the ref trashes takes the hint and drops out of the ring as the two men stand tall over L Verez in the center of the ring.
With the bell rung, and the ban lifted, Bonnie Blue, Sam Kidsgrove, and Andre Jenson come flying down the aisle to the ringside area -- where the trio are confronted by Shadowlove!
Petrov: Shadyguy come from under ring to intercept!
Immediately, Shadow starts trading punches with Kidsgrove, while Bull and Bishop both run across the ring to dive between the ropes, crashing into the Insurgency!
Jimmy Garcia: What the hell is going on? Kevin Bishop and Corey Bull helping Shadowlove to his feet… and now all three continue their assault on the Insurgency!
Bull pulls Kidsgrove up and plants him on the ringside mat with a suplex. Bishop and Jenson trade right hands, until Bishop finds an opening and drops the UCI general manager with another Black Death! Shadowlove puts Bonnie Blue out with a double underhook DDT!
Suddenly, Bull's music cuts, and Vincent Pryde emerges onto the stage. With a satisfied sneer on his face, he slow claps around the microphone in his hand.
Vincent Pryde: Excellent work, gentlemen. That'll teach these Insurgency upstarts what happens to those who step out of line and DEFY me!
He starts to walk down the aisle toward the three men.
Vincent Pryde: My new champion, already proving the wisdom of my judgement when I chose you, Mr. Bull. The initiative you've shown tonight! And Shadowlove -- as a longtime admirer of your work, I'm glad you've finally seen the light, made the right alliance.
He stops in front of them, looking Kevin Bishop right in the eye. A toothy grin splits his face.
Vincent Pryde: Kevin Bishop. I always knew you'd be back. You and me, Kevin, this company… it's destiny, my friend. You can't avoid it. Now, gentlemen, I believe the time has come to take out the trash!
Bull, Bishop, and Shadowlove all exchange questioning glances; in reply, Kevin Bishop gives a single nod of affirmation. For an instant, the trio gaze down at the fallen Insurgency… and then, lightning-fast, they shift their attention to the boss instead!
Dani Applegate: What the holy hell -- again? This is a night of twists and turns as Bishop, Bull, and Shadowlove are now assaulting Vincent Pryde!
A forearm smash from Shadow gets things started, leading into a chest chop from Bull, and then a European uppercut from the man himself, Kevin Bishop! They work him over by turns for several seconds, while the recovering Insurgency make a quiet exit through the crowd.
Meanwhile, at a signal from Bishop, Shadow and Bull pick up Pryde and roll him into the ring. Corey Bull picks up the boss one more time to deliver a flapjack -- right into a Codebreaker from Kevin Bishop!
Jimmy Garcia: The Means to Your End! That's the Harbingers tag team finisher!
Petrov: And Shadyguy add insult to injury with modified Dark Gift! In home country --
Dani Applegate: We know! That's how you celebrate honeymoon.
Petrov: What?! No! What is wrong with you? … is first anniversary.
Bishop picks up the discarded mic and climbs up onto the turnbuckles. Across the ring, Shadowlove follows suit while Corey Bull hefts his World Title over his shoulder.
Kevin Bishop: Listen up! We don't care if you're New Blood Thirsty or UCI Faithful! We don't give a damn if you're management or the lowest jobber on the roster! We sure as Hell don't give a fuck whether you're calling yourselves Guardians or the Insurgency -- if you get in our way, you're going down. It's just that simple. A change is coming to New Blood Wrestling; and WE'RE the Harbingers!
Bishop drops the mic and in unison, he and Shadow raise their arms, while Corey Bull lifts his World Title high overhead. After a brief moment of shocked silence, the crowd explodes in a deafening mix of cheers and boos.
Jimmy Garcia: Harbingers standing tall here tonight and we are out of time! For UCI -- I mean NBW -- and on behalf of my broadcast colleagues, I'm Jimmy Garcia signing off! See you next week!
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