Post by Wade Moor on Nov 11, 2018 21:48:12 GMT -5
Lookin' for all my real friends
How many of us? How many of us are real friends
To real friends, 'til the reel end
'Til the wheels fall off, 'til the wheels don't spin
><><><><><><><><><><><
“Daaaaamn what is this a Class C?!”
Alex Pasternak absolutely balked as Jared showed the formed #beachkrew their new whip, a luxury renovated VW RV nicknamed “The VolkSWAGGIN” - rip WINObago, you were too beautiful for this world! As they started showing themselves around, Lockhart immediately went for the built in mini fridge and pulled out four of Wade’s home brews, crackin’ em open and passing them out for the boys in celebration of their already piling victories. They raised their bottles, toasting to the glorious future of the stable.
Jared looked toward Wade - this is typically where he would make his “state of the stable” speech, where they were and where they were going, just to make sure everyone was on the same page. Times had changed though and with it the hierarchy. They both stood together now, leading the charge, learning from the mistakes of their past. This time they wouldn’t allow petty meandering arguments to rent them in twain. This iteration of #beachkrew was poised to take Action Wrestling by storm, and there was fuck all anyone could do but batten down the hatches. The storm would come - but first, a speech. That look from Jared gave way to a nod. Take it away, Swagrid.
(suck my cock JK Rowling)
“Sometimes, life hands you the toughest lessons. Some stick, some don’t. In all of my years, I’ve learned so much more from rejection and failure then I have from acceptance and success. I pride myself on my mind and the knowledge it possesses. I deride myself on complacency, that serpentine mistress that coils inside and makes her nest. The most recent lesson I learned came at the hands of Torture after I shouldered Action Wrestling’s burden of becoming a viable contender in the world of wrestling. I put this company in my arms and carried it to the heights it’s ascended to today as it’s Havoc Rumble Winner and World Champion. If it weren’t for me, I know for a fact that Action Wrestling wouldn’t be alive in this arena as it is today. A lucrative contract with CBS Sports cemented AW’s spot on the map after I placed them their in the first place. Of course, it wasn’t entirely of my own accord. I had help, other men who were willing to carry this company on their backs, Ryan Lockhart and Alexander Pasternak. Most people are probably asking what commonality the three of us share that we would even band together and reformulate #beachkrew...a stupid fucking question, but one I’m willing to answer regardless. It’s really quite simple, we’ve all been sold out by the very company we built. Hours of blistering hands and craned necks just to be...”
Wade points toward Pasternak.
“...released from our contracts...”
Wade moves his hand towards Lockhart.
“To be suspended after our hands were forced...”
Wade ends on Jared Holmes.
“Or to never even be given an opportunity in the first place. This is what we’ve been reduced to, through no fault of our own, and that’s the Godsnilla honest truth fams. Here we are now, the second week of the Wrestler of the Year Tournament, and instead of Action Wrestling getting the match they deserve in the finals, they’re getting it in the semifinals. Not that it won’t be match of the night or absolutely steal the show, but it’s doing a disservice to the talent that have worked so hard for you, bled and sweat for you. To give the main event to pederast Spencer Adams and L Verez is absolutely a slap in the face and will be dealt with accordingly. Before I get to that, I want to talk about my opponent this week, Ryan Lockhart. A lot of people believe we’re risking reigniting a heated rivalry this week by stepping into the ring with each other, but I’ll quell this doubters nonsense post fuckin’ haste. When you step into the fires of Hell against another man with the same quality of talent and hubris, you become forged in iron, your minds become one. It is a very common scenario where someone you share a mutual respect with becomes a fast friend. That’s exactly what happened with Lockhart and I as we did battle for the Action Wrestlings World Heavyweight Championship at Pandemic and put on the match of the decade. Also there was Spencer Adams.”
Behind Wade cutting that danklicious promo material is Alexander Pasternak testing the durability of the woodwork. You could feel his mind churning wondering whether it was rich mahogany or Nordic cherry. Jared was smoking a clove cigarette while Ryan pounded his ninth beer - the man a fuckin mensch frfr.
“Then, as we served our suspensions, we found ourselves in constant communication and he became an obvious pick for this reformed #beachkrew. We became friends, both of us had been screwed by the same company, I mean ya basically did it to your own fucking selves at that point. You gave Wade Moor and Ryan Lockhart the biggest bone to pick off of ya, and you better believe we’re going to wrench it from your still warm carcass. You seem to think that this match between the two of us is going to drive a wedge and force us to split one week going into our formidable super group, but i believe the exact opposite. I believe the two of us are going to go out there and do what we fucking do best and that’s put on an absolute wrestling clinic unmatched by any other two people on this roster. You have The Hart of the Sea, Ryan Lockhart. You have The Leviathan Wade Moor. Two monolithic men vying for a title both of them deserve any time they step into that ring. No matter what, one of us is going to lose on Monday, but regardless there will be a member of #beachkrew as Wrestler of the Year. If Lockhart were to beat me, I wouldn’t see that as a blemish on my career, I would take it as a point of pride. Someone that I’ve mentored personally stepped up his game and beat me? There’s no feeling more empowering and that’s something that Spencer Adams and his #fightsmart flunkies will never be able to understand. I give the men I lead the tools they need for success, and Spencer Adams uses his men as tools for his success.
“You hear that Kinkin Kuckly? Or maybe I should ask Kemp and Aquarius? Those fuckin’ #fakefriends latching on to Spencer Adams is the jobberest thing I can think of, and a punishment oddly befitting the crime perpetuated. Instead of riding and dying for #beachkrew, they let Adams stick his fingers up their poopers. Tell me, how does systematic failure taste? For thirty days I was suspended and for thirty days I watched as #fightsmart accomplished absolutely nothing. The biggest challenge they faced was that stem Karlie Nash and her vehemently lesbian tag team partner Nikki whatever the fuck and anyone with more than half a brain cell can beat the shit out of them. LickUp Cumly lost it to a fuckin’ promo about Elmer’s glue or something. A sad state of affairs that #fightsmart has found themselves in 2018. Can’t even force themselves to succeed so they’ve gone off the deep end trying to quell the rising tide that is #beachkrew with inane hashtags and repetitive semantics. These are all absolutely things I’ve heard before from men that are far greater than y’all in any capacity, and yet we still stand. It’s 2018 and #beachkrew is still a thing because the rest of you possess not the scruples to take our place, to force us out of action, to rise above it all and make a name for yourself.
“Not like Ryan and I. Two thicked dicked warriors who have transcended above the common Action Wrestling riff raff. There isn’t anyone I would rather share the ring with than him. Don’t think because I have respect for Lockhart that means I’m going to go soft on him. In fact, I’m gonna bring it harder than I ever have because I know he can handle it and can dish it back just as hard, if not harder. We’ll both step into that ring and once again enter the fires of Hell. We’ll fight tooth and nail because you best believe we both want that Wrestler of the Year - iffin you think we still ain’t a little greedy on that two Kay eighteen tip then you’re dumber than ya fuckin’ look (and that’s pretty fuckin’ dumb baybee). Action Wrestling thought they’d seen the end of us, but it’s really only beginning.”
“Good shit, Wade”, Jared said, “Cheers!”
The four of them clanged their glasses together in toast to the future. Wade locked eyes with Ryan, that glint of hope in them, but underneath something else burned. It was faint, dim even, but he spotted it all the same. Wade had spent his most formative years watching from the depths, a coiled Leviathan. He noticed things that others couldn’t see, or willfully refused to.
A tinge of jealousy?
Wade smiled a toothy grin at Lockhart, tossing a wink in his direction. The kid wanted to test his mettle against Wade Moor once again? Then he was going to let him. He almost silently dared him to call for the ref, start the match right here in the VolkSWAGGIN and continue it all the way until Monday in Oxford.
No such luck, though.
Wade polished off his beer as he kept his gaze burning towards Lockhart.
How many of us? How many of us are real friends
To real friends, 'til the reel end
'Til the wheels fall off, 'til the wheels don't spin
><><><><><><><><><><><
“Daaaaamn what is this a Class C?!”
Alex Pasternak absolutely balked as Jared showed the formed #beachkrew their new whip, a luxury renovated VW RV nicknamed “The VolkSWAGGIN” - rip WINObago, you were too beautiful for this world! As they started showing themselves around, Lockhart immediately went for the built in mini fridge and pulled out four of Wade’s home brews, crackin’ em open and passing them out for the boys in celebration of their already piling victories. They raised their bottles, toasting to the glorious future of the stable.
Jared looked toward Wade - this is typically where he would make his “state of the stable” speech, where they were and where they were going, just to make sure everyone was on the same page. Times had changed though and with it the hierarchy. They both stood together now, leading the charge, learning from the mistakes of their past. This time they wouldn’t allow petty meandering arguments to rent them in twain. This iteration of #beachkrew was poised to take Action Wrestling by storm, and there was fuck all anyone could do but batten down the hatches. The storm would come - but first, a speech. That look from Jared gave way to a nod. Take it away, Swagrid.
(suck my cock JK Rowling)
“Sometimes, life hands you the toughest lessons. Some stick, some don’t. In all of my years, I’ve learned so much more from rejection and failure then I have from acceptance and success. I pride myself on my mind and the knowledge it possesses. I deride myself on complacency, that serpentine mistress that coils inside and makes her nest. The most recent lesson I learned came at the hands of Torture after I shouldered Action Wrestling’s burden of becoming a viable contender in the world of wrestling. I put this company in my arms and carried it to the heights it’s ascended to today as it’s Havoc Rumble Winner and World Champion. If it weren’t for me, I know for a fact that Action Wrestling wouldn’t be alive in this arena as it is today. A lucrative contract with CBS Sports cemented AW’s spot on the map after I placed them their in the first place. Of course, it wasn’t entirely of my own accord. I had help, other men who were willing to carry this company on their backs, Ryan Lockhart and Alexander Pasternak. Most people are probably asking what commonality the three of us share that we would even band together and reformulate #beachkrew...a stupid fucking question, but one I’m willing to answer regardless. It’s really quite simple, we’ve all been sold out by the very company we built. Hours of blistering hands and craned necks just to be...”
Wade points toward Pasternak.
“...released from our contracts...”
Wade moves his hand towards Lockhart.
“To be suspended after our hands were forced...”
Wade ends on Jared Holmes.
“Or to never even be given an opportunity in the first place. This is what we’ve been reduced to, through no fault of our own, and that’s the Godsnilla honest truth fams. Here we are now, the second week of the Wrestler of the Year Tournament, and instead of Action Wrestling getting the match they deserve in the finals, they’re getting it in the semifinals. Not that it won’t be match of the night or absolutely steal the show, but it’s doing a disservice to the talent that have worked so hard for you, bled and sweat for you. To give the main event to pederast Spencer Adams and L Verez is absolutely a slap in the face and will be dealt with accordingly. Before I get to that, I want to talk about my opponent this week, Ryan Lockhart. A lot of people believe we’re risking reigniting a heated rivalry this week by stepping into the ring with each other, but I’ll quell this doubters nonsense post fuckin’ haste. When you step into the fires of Hell against another man with the same quality of talent and hubris, you become forged in iron, your minds become one. It is a very common scenario where someone you share a mutual respect with becomes a fast friend. That’s exactly what happened with Lockhart and I as we did battle for the Action Wrestlings World Heavyweight Championship at Pandemic and put on the match of the decade. Also there was Spencer Adams.”
Behind Wade cutting that danklicious promo material is Alexander Pasternak testing the durability of the woodwork. You could feel his mind churning wondering whether it was rich mahogany or Nordic cherry. Jared was smoking a clove cigarette while Ryan pounded his ninth beer - the man a fuckin mensch frfr.
“Then, as we served our suspensions, we found ourselves in constant communication and he became an obvious pick for this reformed #beachkrew. We became friends, both of us had been screwed by the same company, I mean ya basically did it to your own fucking selves at that point. You gave Wade Moor and Ryan Lockhart the biggest bone to pick off of ya, and you better believe we’re going to wrench it from your still warm carcass. You seem to think that this match between the two of us is going to drive a wedge and force us to split one week going into our formidable super group, but i believe the exact opposite. I believe the two of us are going to go out there and do what we fucking do best and that’s put on an absolute wrestling clinic unmatched by any other two people on this roster. You have The Hart of the Sea, Ryan Lockhart. You have The Leviathan Wade Moor. Two monolithic men vying for a title both of them deserve any time they step into that ring. No matter what, one of us is going to lose on Monday, but regardless there will be a member of #beachkrew as Wrestler of the Year. If Lockhart were to beat me, I wouldn’t see that as a blemish on my career, I would take it as a point of pride. Someone that I’ve mentored personally stepped up his game and beat me? There’s no feeling more empowering and that’s something that Spencer Adams and his #fightsmart flunkies will never be able to understand. I give the men I lead the tools they need for success, and Spencer Adams uses his men as tools for his success.
“You hear that Kinkin Kuckly? Or maybe I should ask Kemp and Aquarius? Those fuckin’ #fakefriends latching on to Spencer Adams is the jobberest thing I can think of, and a punishment oddly befitting the crime perpetuated. Instead of riding and dying for #beachkrew, they let Adams stick his fingers up their poopers. Tell me, how does systematic failure taste? For thirty days I was suspended and for thirty days I watched as #fightsmart accomplished absolutely nothing. The biggest challenge they faced was that stem Karlie Nash and her vehemently lesbian tag team partner Nikki whatever the fuck and anyone with more than half a brain cell can beat the shit out of them. LickUp Cumly lost it to a fuckin’ promo about Elmer’s glue or something. A sad state of affairs that #fightsmart has found themselves in 2018. Can’t even force themselves to succeed so they’ve gone off the deep end trying to quell the rising tide that is #beachkrew with inane hashtags and repetitive semantics. These are all absolutely things I’ve heard before from men that are far greater than y’all in any capacity, and yet we still stand. It’s 2018 and #beachkrew is still a thing because the rest of you possess not the scruples to take our place, to force us out of action, to rise above it all and make a name for yourself.
“Not like Ryan and I. Two thicked dicked warriors who have transcended above the common Action Wrestling riff raff. There isn’t anyone I would rather share the ring with than him. Don’t think because I have respect for Lockhart that means I’m going to go soft on him. In fact, I’m gonna bring it harder than I ever have because I know he can handle it and can dish it back just as hard, if not harder. We’ll both step into that ring and once again enter the fires of Hell. We’ll fight tooth and nail because you best believe we both want that Wrestler of the Year - iffin you think we still ain’t a little greedy on that two Kay eighteen tip then you’re dumber than ya fuckin’ look (and that’s pretty fuckin’ dumb baybee). Action Wrestling thought they’d seen the end of us, but it’s really only beginning.”
“Good shit, Wade”, Jared said, “Cheers!”
The four of them clanged their glasses together in toast to the future. Wade locked eyes with Ryan, that glint of hope in them, but underneath something else burned. It was faint, dim even, but he spotted it all the same. Wade had spent his most formative years watching from the depths, a coiled Leviathan. He noticed things that others couldn’t see, or willfully refused to.
A tinge of jealousy?
Wade smiled a toothy grin at Lockhart, tossing a wink in his direction. The kid wanted to test his mettle against Wade Moor once again? Then he was going to let him. He almost silently dared him to call for the ref, start the match right here in the VolkSWAGGIN and continue it all the way until Monday in Oxford.
No such luck, though.
Wade polished off his beer as he kept his gaze burning towards Lockhart.