Post by Azurine Vebbins on Oct 9, 2022 5:00:38 GMT -5
Azurine Vebbins: Supersonic salutations and scintillatin’ sentiments, Seattleites! Knights of Vespucci, deyr’s a cornucopia of celebrations coincidin’ wid SuperCruiserClash dis upcomin’ Monday. Da two obvious ones bein’ Native American/Indigenous Peoples Day and T’anks-givin’ for our nord-ern neighbors. Additionally, deyr are days commemoratin’ World Mental Healin’, kickin’ butt, da Metric system, handbags, and angel food cake. Basic as da computer language, October 10 should be about any-din’ but cruel conquistadors. Maybe dat’s why I’m dancin’ dree-way wid “Da Silver Statue” and my estranged mod-der’s pouncer?
Leadin’ off, let’s discuss Indigenous People’s Day. Here in Washin’-ton State, dat’s what da holiday has been transformed into. Makes da day happier goin’ wid da honorable instead of horrible heritage. Dat’s why I’m gonna High Stick Superkick dat gold-guardin’ goon known as Lázaro Vicente. Much like a certain Christopher, he’s da odd man out. I’m pursuin’ pole position in dis tango. Da best way to achieve dat is tusslin’ dat game token-totin’ totem out of alignment. Should be grateful Karlie and I are grapplin’ him back to anonymity.
Of course, now you’re askin’: why celebrate T’anks-givin’ so early? Number A: My supportive spouse Corrie’s Canadian. Your city’s also two degrees latitude below deyr border line. Letter 2: Between Geno Smid recently bein’ a surprisin’-ly sufficient startin’ Seahawks quarterback and your Mariners experiencin’ SoDo Mojo, you’re blessed beyond belief wid dose modern miracles. For dose curious, locals referred to deyr winnin’ ways as “Soud Downtown Magic.” Den again, da last time dis ferry weather franchise was last relevant happened to be twenty-one years ago. Number C: I appreciate havin’ one heckuva hootenanny at da new hockey rink in town. It’s billed as da Climate Pledge Arena. However, since chanters here cheer for da Krakens, most would prefer it be known as “Da Krak Den.” Letter 4: Wid no disqualifications, countouts, or five minutes majors for fightin’, I can check dat nasty Nash into da boards wid-out penalty.
Speakin’ of wid-out penalty, I must make sure dis promotional material’s streams out on time. Dat bein’ uttered, here’s where dose odd-er observances come into power play. World Mental Healin’ Day? What’s better for dat dan maulin’ da menacin’ manifestation of an Oedipal complex? Kick Butt Day works itself into sudden dead double overtime since I’ve got bode feet and two rivals. Now, da metric system’s perfect for perspective change when you want anoder way to go yard. National Handbag Day since I’m earnin’ da winner’s purse and I’ve got plenty of tricks. Finally, deyr’s Angel Food Cake Day considerin’ I’m “Da Adorkable Angel” who enjoys bakin’? Dat should cover all da proverbial bases. Actually, one more din’...you could also watch multiple episodes of Peter Falk's "Columbo" on October 10.
Leadin’ off, let’s discuss Indigenous People’s Day. Here in Washin’-ton State, dat’s what da holiday has been transformed into. Makes da day happier goin’ wid da honorable instead of horrible heritage. Dat’s why I’m gonna High Stick Superkick dat gold-guardin’ goon known as Lázaro Vicente. Much like a certain Christopher, he’s da odd man out. I’m pursuin’ pole position in dis tango. Da best way to achieve dat is tusslin’ dat game token-totin’ totem out of alignment. Should be grateful Karlie and I are grapplin’ him back to anonymity.
Of course, now you’re askin’: why celebrate T’anks-givin’ so early? Number A: My supportive spouse Corrie’s Canadian. Your city’s also two degrees latitude below deyr border line. Letter 2: Between Geno Smid recently bein’ a surprisin’-ly sufficient startin’ Seahawks quarterback and your Mariners experiencin’ SoDo Mojo, you’re blessed beyond belief wid dose modern miracles. For dose curious, locals referred to deyr winnin’ ways as “Soud Downtown Magic.” Den again, da last time dis ferry weather franchise was last relevant happened to be twenty-one years ago. Number C: I appreciate havin’ one heckuva hootenanny at da new hockey rink in town. It’s billed as da Climate Pledge Arena. However, since chanters here cheer for da Krakens, most would prefer it be known as “Da Krak Den.” Letter 4: Wid no disqualifications, countouts, or five minutes majors for fightin’, I can check dat nasty Nash into da boards wid-out penalty.
Speakin’ of wid-out penalty, I must make sure dis promotional material’s streams out on time. Dat bein’ uttered, here’s where dose odd-er observances come into power play. World Mental Healin’ Day? What’s better for dat dan maulin’ da menacin’ manifestation of an Oedipal complex? Kick Butt Day works itself into sudden dead double overtime since I’ve got bode feet and two rivals. Now, da metric system’s perfect for perspective change when you want anoder way to go yard. National Handbag Day since I’m earnin’ da winner’s purse and I’ve got plenty of tricks. Finally, deyr’s Angel Food Cake Day considerin’ I’m “Da Adorkable Angel” who enjoys bakin’? Dat should cover all da proverbial bases. Actually, one more din’...you could also watch multiple episodes of Peter Falk's "Columbo" on October 10.
